AwptiK Posted March 13, 2013 Posted March 13, 2013 After a really wonderful 3 months, my ex broke up with me yesterday around this time. It was legitimately out of no where, despite some of the thoughts that dumpers usually deal with the feelings for a while before the breakup. Not to say it wasn't across her mind, but the real thought wasn't put in until yesterday morning.. Everything was cool up until the middle of yesterday. The morning text exchange was fine, the day before, she was same as always. She's pretty readable when it comes to emotions. She's in nursing school and has a 2-year old. That's a lot of time-commitment and that's why she left me. She's been really stressed lately with school, and I could tell it was piling up on her. She just started a new 5-week block of classes and didn't do too well on a test. If anyone knows nursing school, failing a class = no more nursing school. When that's her future (her words), she needs to focus on it. So I take it that she was overwhelmed with stress and needed to find a way to focus more. I hate being a "scapegoat" or whatever, because I legitimately helped her with class as much as I could. I helped her study, and every night around 8 she'd sit down to study, so we wouldn't text until bed. No where in there was I like "Hey let's hangout instead". If anything, she needed to try studying at 7, or earlier, and I wouldn't have minded that extra hour at all. Haven't talked since the end of the breakup talk. The next few days will probably be hard on her, she's moving Friday and at some point is going to unpack my shirts she has and various cards from flowers, vday, etc that I've given her. Not to mention, Monday is the actual date of our 3rd month. I know a lot of readers would jump to the "it's a bs reason" idea, but knowing her and how she is, I don't see it being anything but truth. She's blunt enough to have told others, "it's not working/we don't work". Everyone i've talked to who knows her, says that she will likely come around when she finds a better way to manage school. I'm not waiting around though. If she comes around soon, great. Otherwise my feelings, VERY strong ones at that, still diminish over time.
OwlSoul Posted March 13, 2013 Posted March 13, 2013 It was legitimately out of no where, despite some of the thoughts that dumpers usually deal with the feelings for a while before the breakup. Depends on the person and how much do you know her and love. Sometimes the dumpees just ignore all the signs, or see them and make everything even worse. She's in nursing school and has a 2-year old. That's a lot of time-commitment and that's why she left me. Most likely she was not giving you as much as you were expecting from her. Might it be that you were showing a lot of care and pressuring her by doing this? I helped her study, and every night around 8 she'd sit down to study, so we wouldn't text until bed. Sadly, I think, this was driving her away I know a lot of readers would jump to the "it's a bs reason" idea Tbh, there is no other reason for a break-up if both partners love equally. Distance/religions/work and etc. usually mean nothing for already emotionally tied people. I think you need to learn to get over her and never ever repeat the behaviour of yours for the last month before you both broke up. Most likely she will be back to you soon, if you were not acting needy and showing her that you'll always be around.
Author AwptiK Posted March 13, 2013 Author Posted March 13, 2013 Yeah... I saw the stress increases, not so much anything with us though. So I think it's all just a stress-overload that hit her yesterday. Curious as to how not texting and giving her the time to study would drive one away? It's just the simple understanding that I respect her priorities and how important school is. Thanks for the advice though, I haven't been needy or changed in the last month from the usual. Although I could see her stressing more and me being the same, coming off with the same results.
OwlSoul Posted March 13, 2013 Posted March 13, 2013 Curious as to how not texting and giving her the time to study would drive one away? It's just the simple understanding that I respect her priorities and how important school is. Sorry, I misread the helping out with studies part as in you was actually helping.
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