farmkid Posted September 7, 2004 Posted September 7, 2004 i have recently discovered that my roomate and his girlfriend are still in close contact with my x-girlfriend...... we broke up about three months ago...not on good trems and my roomate and his girl friend were never really friends with her before..... but after we broke up it seem as though she didn't want to be out of my social circle so she has been slowly befriending my roomates girlfriend...and now its gotten to the point where i am getting cut out because she is getting invited instead.... i can sort of understand because my roomates girlfriend has few friends...so she is excited about all the attention she is getting from my ex but im a little disappointed that my roomate has not been more upfornt with me.... my ex was great so i can see why they would want to stay in touch but ive been friends with my roomate for 7 years and should be able to expect a tad more loyalty.......not that i want him to stand up to his girlfriend for me but at least be upfront with me.... am i just way off base or do i need to find better friends????? and if so since i own our apartment is it out of line to ask him to move out????
YellowLioness Posted September 8, 2004 Posted September 8, 2004 My best guy friend and I met through one of my exes, whom he was friends with at the time. They all owned this huge house together. I still came to visit after the ex and I broke up, and that caused some trouble between my ex and my best guy friend. My ex was really immature about the whole thing, even when he had another girlfriend. My opinion is that they should be able to have over whom they wish as they help out with bills, too. I think that kicking them out would be too extreme because then you really would lose the friendships. Maybe you can set some ground rules about when she is allowed to come over, (ie when you're not there). However, if they wait for you to leave before making plans then that is a problem, which seems to be the case. You should be honest with them about how you feel, and then go from there. If she really makes you that uncomfortable, then tell your friends that you need equal time with them as she gets, but that you are not willing to be around her because you are not yet to the "friends" stage.
farmkid Posted September 9, 2004 Posted September 9, 2004 thanks for replying.......it seems as though you sympathize with me even though we seem to have been on the opposite sides of the same situation... which is nice to know... it just hurts to think that as a couple they are choosing her friendship over mine..... ive always bent over backwards for them...... part of it may be that my ex is extremely rich.... and sometimes money speaks pretty loudly.... i know that it is probably pretty extreme to ask them to leave but when i feel like they dumped me for her and i have her rubbing it in my face....yes she always calls to find out why i wasn't out with them or if i was invited....it really burns....
YellowLioness Posted September 9, 2004 Posted September 9, 2004 yes she always calls to find out why i wasn't out with them or if i was invited....it really burns.... Dude, don't put up with it. Tell her that over is over, and that you don't want any more contact with her. If she keeps putting herself in your way, then she is just being vindictive and bitchy. Tell her to stop the bullcrap. I would. Then again... I don't put up with a whole lot, which is why I have like 5 friends total. LOL.
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