Berrie26 Posted March 13, 2013 Posted March 13, 2013 I've been dating a man for almost 2 years. He often disappears for a week or so when he gets upset about something. He has awful communication skills and disappearing for a week doesn't even phase him. He has issues with fear, abandonment and being a textbook fear of commitment. He hasn't spoken to me in 11 days now...I'm at the point where I've had enough in this relationship. I can't live my life being ignored every couple weeks. So I know I need to write that dreaded letter. Ugh! Problem is A TON of my stuff is at his house as we were preparing to move in together...I mean my kids beds, my bed, clothes that are mine and the kids, other furniture, kitchen stuff, toys, ect. Do I ask him to drop this stuff off? He lives about an hour away and there's no way I could get all the furniture myself. Can someone help me draft a letter?? I have no idea where to start without coming off like an emotional mess.
oldschool1 Posted March 13, 2013 Posted March 13, 2013 Berrie, It sounds like a very good idea to break up with this man. A guy who wanders off for weeks is probably not responsible enough to live in a household with children. So, this seems like a smart decision! Do you think he's vindictive or violent? Some people behave wonderfully day-to-day but become raging lunatics when insulted by a breakup. I think you should get a friend or mover to help you (for physical protection and to help with your furniture), and go over there as soon as possible. It seems like a good idea to let him know that you are dissolving the relationship, and don't give him any room for negotiation. Just be businesslike, rational, polite and calm. This could come as a surprise to him, so be prepared for odd reactions. Ask him if you could come when he's NOT there. That would be ideal. 2
Treasa Posted March 13, 2013 Posted March 13, 2013 He isn't really responsible for your stuff. Do you have access to his house without him there? Or is your stuff there, and he's there? Either way, I think you need to call him and tell him, and then rent a U-Haul, get a friend, and go get your stuff. The friend will help you move your furniture and be there for support.
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