Ready36 Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 My question is, is it possible for feelings to ever come back once you feel differently about someone? i.e. the romantic feelings became more like 'friendship' love? I'm thinking really about in the future - if you have been broken up for some time, months or perhaps even years later? Basically here is my story. Going out with a girl, about 7 months. For the first 5 months (approx) we were both crazy about each other and very attracted to each other. She was just turning 23 and I am just turning 29, so there is a bit of an age gap. She ended it, saying she woke up one morning and felt different about me. But there was more too it. Firstly, she said it really was her not me, that she has issues and is struggling with a lot of stuff at the moment. She said wehen she ended it that she wants to be by herself, is thinking of going away for a while and is happier being in relationships with her friends. She also said that she thought about 2 months before ending it that she wasn't ready for a relationship. I do remember now things she said towards the end, red flags that you just don't spot when you are in love. She said that I did nothing wrong at all, I was the perfect boyfriend, one in a million and any girl is lucky to have me. We had some contact after, intiated by me and unfortunately one encounter that ended up with me acting like an idiot because I was drunk and founf her with a guy she was seeing (but I know for a fact this only started about 5-6 weeks after she ended it with me because he told me!) and I have found out that she is now dating someone else too. She said the first guy was nothing. Now from what I can make out from her backstory, she is rarely without a guy. But, she hasn't had a realtionship (or anything serious) for a long time before me - just causual stuff. She does have issues, and I think they revolve around commitment. Her dad left her when she was little and send her horrible messages, her first boyfrind of 3 years was cheating on her for like 6 months and the last guy she saw before me had unprotected sex with her when she was drunk, didn't tell her he wasn't wearing anything and she ended up pregannt and had to have an abortion and counselling. Then I came along tried to be a god guy, make her happy, spoilt her a bit and did things for her that she said no one had done before. Once she even said I don't deserve it! I think if I can be criticised for anything, it's that I stopped playing it cool and perhaps did too much and showed too much. I always tried to be thoughtful, I just thought that's what good boyfriends should do - but perhaps I started to be too 'nice' and not sexy?? Then BAM, it's over. This guy she is now seeing is friends with her sister, a really good looking lad too. She has wished me well but has basically emplied we won't ever talk again. We are no contact and not planing to remain friends. Now, I am clearly going to have to move on. BUT would like to think that my bridges aren't totally burnt and that perhaps in time when she is older (and if of course we are both single) she might, MIGHT be able to feel the same way about me.
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