Elfie Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 I think liars have to have good memories, and one thing the MM said was word for word the same as another time: I saw him with some groceries one Saturday, and a bottle of wine. In my insecurity, I pictured them curled up drinking it, so I asked who the wine was for. He said "Oh I just came out for some milk and she rang and said pick up a bottle of wine while you're out". A few months later, the ssame thing happened, but this time I said "wine again, must be Saturday night" (it was) and he said the EXACT same reply! When it happened a 3rd time (!) with the exact same reply, I thought of all the times he was able to think like a switch to cover his tracks, thinking of long rehearsed excuses I'd been fed. A genuine person would use a bit of variety in their answers would they not? Or jsut say yes, we have wine at weekends. he was probably lying to protect himself, or me, maybe. Another time he rang on his way home, told me where he was, and told me he needed to get some fuel but didn't know whether to get it on his way home or on the way to work next day (why tell me, he drives for a living) but knowing wehre he was, I knew he was passing a filling station. Then, he told me his evening plans - do his pack up, watch TV and go to bed. Very odd, as I knew by then his evenings were pretty much the same as what he'd described, but why make a point of telling me all this...? A few mionutes later he arrives home. An hour later he goes out with his wife. I guess he was doing the classic lie thing - where you say too much, give to much information, in an effort to cover yourself. I'd guess he was thinking if I saw him out I would think he was getting fuel (like 2 miles from where he lives, even though he passes it going to and from work!) or that if I hadn't seen him go out, I'd guess he was at hme, doing his pack up, watching tv. The lines he told me about when he was and wasn't physicla with his W didn't ring true either - I know it's classic, but I wanted to believe him. I do't have actual facts, but I'm taking more notice of my gut instinct but also couldn't cope with the constant doubts each day. I'm pleased to say I have made an appointment to seek therapy, so even though I live opposite him and am still vulnerable to his charm, I know I'm now arming myself with the relevant tools to keep him away. 1
skywriter Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 I am so glad to hear this Elfie! You can be done with this dead end and on to something real. Keep posting and let us know how the therapy goes.
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