Revolver Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 is because men are simply more open and honest about being shallow. You simply see male shallowness more out in the open. A man will say the reason I didnt date her or want to be with her is because she's ugly(in his eyes). But for women it's different, they're more indirect and flat out lie more. Women will say things like "he lacked confidence", " didnt show great body language", "I think your attractive but i don't want to ruin our friendship", "Your too good for me" "you'd make someone a great BF" But 95% of the time ^^^is just bull****. She just didnt find that guy attractive, it's that simple. Let me be clear, theres nothing wrong with this, just be honest. But she's not going to say that for fear of hurting his feelings. I've always said the rejection stories of men saying women were mean and that they EMBARASSED them on purpose was overblown. The Majority of the time if your respectful, and aren't too pushy even if you get turned down most women aren't going to go out of their way to flat out crush your soul. They'll just politely turn you down and lie about the reason The thing is tho, alot of those men don't know the real reason why they're being rejected(they're ugly). And I think that's why this myth is passed on. I've always felt it was somewhat equal between men and women 2
iKING Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 I think one of the main reasons is women are typically more sensitive to other's feelings. Tell a guy outright that he's ugly and he'll end up on here complaining. Guys are more sensitive then they give themselves credit for. They're actually doing guys a favor by not destroying their ego/self-image (if there's any left). Guys tend to care less about what the words they say makes the receiving party feel, so they're more blunt about things. 5
Lani Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 Women are realising that men are more sensitive than they let on. They just hide that they're offended, and get all aggressive about it. We don't particularly want to deal with that, so we soften the blow. It is in our nature to be nice, and even I, as someone brutally honest, soften things when I'm letting guys down. We're onto your sensitivities, whether you are or not. 2
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 In my dating experience, women are far less shallow than men, in general. Some women are more shallow than others, of course. But even the most shallow woman I've ever met has been considerably less shallow than the least shallow of men. Usually, if a guy isn't dating a hot girl, it's either because he's lazy or he lacks confidence.
tbf Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 This is a pet peeve of mine, how shallow many men are when it comes to attraction. If you consider a pie chart of attraction for many guys, looks comprise the majority of the pie chart. 3
c57dood Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 Oh, Lordy! Have you ever been around a group of girls? Doesn't sound like you have. Let's stop for a second. Would a guy flat out tell THE GIRL herself she's ugly? He'd have to be a real piece of work to do that. Would he say to his friends behind her back "She's so ugly that's why I don't like her!"? Of course he would. Now, do you not think women do the same thing? She may let his feelings down gently TO HIS FACE, but when she's back with her girlfriends you better believe she's gonna do the same thing the guy will do. Both types of characters who would tell someone they are ugly to their face occurs in both sexes: ******* for a guy, bitch for a girl. 2
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 Oh, Lordy! Have you ever been around a group of girls? Doesn't sound like you have. Let's stop for a second. Would a guy flat out tell THE GIRL herself she's ugly? He'd have to be a real piece of work to do that. Would he say to his friends behind his back "She's so ugly that's why I don't like her!"? Of course he would. Now, do you not think women do the same thing? She may let his feelings down gently TO HIS FACE, but when she's back with her girlfriends you better believe she's gonna do the same thing the guy will do. Both types of characters who would tell someone they are ugly to their face occurs in both sexes: ******* for a guy, bitch for a girl. I have tons of female friends. They ALWAYS talk about their type. "He has to be tall, good-looking, earning 100k, etc." Then they end up with short, ugly, poor guys lol. You have to stop paying so much attention to what people say and watch what they do. 1
c57dood Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 I have tons of female friends. They ALWAYS talk about their type. "He has to be tall, good-looking, earning 100k, etc." Then they end up with short, ugly, poor guys lol. You have to stop paying so much attention to what people say and watch what they do. To you they may be ugly, but obviously not to them. How many men say "She's gotta have big boobs, big butt round waist, cook like a mofo, and do my laundry". How many men actually end up with that? See what I'm saying? Goes both ways. If men and women were not equally shallow we wouldn't be here right now. 1
iKING Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 To you they may be ugly, but obviously not to them. How many men say "She's gotta have big boobs, big butt round waist, cook like a mofo, and do my laundry". How many men actually end up with that? See what I'm saying? Goes both ways. If men and women were not equally shallow we wouldn't be here right now. Personally I couldn't care less about any of that and don't say I do. I prefer smaller boobs, don't care much about butt as long as it's not gross, and am perfectly capable of cooking my own food and doing my own laundry. Where in the world do guys get these ideals? It's not the 1940s anymore guys. 1
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 To you they may be ugly, but obviously not to them. How many men say "She's gotta have big boobs, big butt round waist, cook like a mofo, and do my laundry". How many men actually end up with that? See what I'm saying? Goes both ways. If men and women were not equally shallow we wouldn't be here right now. And why do you think that is? Because they're personality makes them more attractive. I've made a career out of dating girls who originally thought I wasn't their type. How? Because I'm a salesman. That's all dating is. How good are you at selling yourself? 2
c57dood Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 Personally I couldn't care less about any of that and don't say I do. I prefer smaller boobs, don't care much about butt as long as it's not gross, and am perfectly capable of cooking my own food and doing my own laundry. Where in the world do guys get these ideals? It's not the 1940s anymore guys. I'm just using that as an example. Whatever your personal preference is that's what you're looking for.
iKING Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 I'm just using that as an example. Whatever your personal preference is that's what you're looking for. Ah, I agree with you on that point to an extent, although, I've dated every type of woman. I can find an attractive (both personality and looks) girl out of just about any "type". Why place limitations on yourself?
c57dood Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 And why do you think that is? Because they're personality makes them more attractive. I've made a career out of dating girls who originally thought I wasn't their type. How? Because I'm a salesman. That's all dating is. How good are you at selling yourself? You've made a "career" out of it? That means the girls pay you a living wage to date them. For some reason......I'm not buying that! You do not possess the woman's eyes. You cannot make the judgement call that he is ugly because you aren't dating him. Simple as that. If you're such a good salesman, you're gonna have to try a little harder to sell that idea.
c57dood Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 Ah, I agree with you on that point to an extent, although, I've dated every type of woman. I can find an attractive (both personality and looks) girl out of just about any "type". Why place limitations on yourself? I'm not, but the point is both sexes do this. You just said yourself you can find any girl attractive, which counts against the author's original assertion that people think men are more shallow than women.
mesmerized Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 and because well...men ARE more shallow, when it comes to looks that is. There is abundance of studies to back it up, if the huge makeup and plastic surgery industry is not an enough reason for you. That does not mean women are not shallow, just less than men
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 You've made a "career" out of it? That means the girls pay you a living wage to date them. For some reason......I'm not buying that! It's a figure of speech, bro. It means that it happens to me often. You do not possess the woman's eyes. You cannot make the judgement call that he is ugly because you aren't dating him. Simple as that. If you're such a good salesman, you're gonna have to try a little harder to sell that idea. I'm not trying to sell you anything. Believe what you want to believe.
c57dood Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 and because well...men ARE more shallow, when it comes to looks that is. There is abundance of studies to back it up, if the huge makeup and plastic surgery industry is not an enough reason for you. That does not mean women are not shallow, just less than men Go ahead, source the studies right now. Otherwise, I don't buy what you're saying either. 1
sharklazers Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 (edited) Women do care about superficial stuff more than some people might think. But they also care a lot more about security. Money is a factor, but so is status, confidence, body language, being emotionally supportive, etc. Their social circle is another big source of security so how the relationship will affect family and friends is also a factor. These things could be seen as less superficial. Men care less about security, and to what extent they do care they know they'd be looked down on if they let it show. That's why it'll seem like men are more superficial and to some extent they really are. But women shouldn't underestimate how much it can mean to a man to offer emotional support without immasuclating him. Edited March 12, 2013 by sharklazers
c57dood Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 It's a figure of speech, bro. It means that it happens to me often. I'm not trying to sell you anything. Believe what you want to believe. Just what a salesman would say! Crafty one you are! "No pressure to buy. I believe in my product like bees believe in their honey!"
somedude81 Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 It's insulting when a woman refuses to be honest and thinks she has to lie to protect my feelings. I'm not a little boy. If you are rejecting me because you are not attracted, tell me, it won't crush my self-esteem. No need to come up with some lie about chemistry or compatibility. 1
somedude81 Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 and because well...men ARE more shallow, when it comes to looks that is. There is abundance of studies to back it up, if the huge makeup and plastic surgery industry is not an enough reason for you. That does not mean women are not shallow, just less than men Do you expect anybody to believe that women only wear makeup, dress stylishly and get plastic surgery to look good for men?
PJKino Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 Physical attraction is important for everybody. I wouldnt date somebody Im not attracted to and I would hope other girls would do the same. Its a bit naive to think every couple is extremely physically attracted to earh other Some people arent attractive enough to get people they are attracted to
pbjbear Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 Do you expect anybody to believe that women only wear makeup, dress stylishly and get plastic surgery to look good for men? If men evolved to use a woman's brain as a measure to determine fertility, women would all be studying out the wazoo and competing at academia. To answer your question, I do believe that. Women are so used to doing this however most dont realize this is what it boils down to.
mesmerized Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 Do you expect anybody to believe that women only wear makeup, dress stylishly and get plastic surgery to look good for men? I don't really expect you to understand it. You still have a long way to go before that. 1
somedude81 Posted March 12, 2013 Posted March 12, 2013 If men evolved to use a woman's brain as a measure to determine fertility, women would all be studying out the wazoo and competing at academia. To answer your question, I do believe that. Women are so used to doing this however most dont realize this is what it boils down to. I don't really expect you to understand it. You still have a long way to go before that. Fertility? Ha. Here's what's up. The vast majority of men don't care about makeup, or what latest fashion a woman is wearing or what kind of facial paint she's is wearing or what kind of bag she has. That's all noise. If women truly dressed to impress men, they would only wear bikinis and lingerie. Make-up is fine when being used to hide flaws and everything else is overkill. Long silky hair is nice but not wild hairstyles. Most plastic surgery looks horrible anyways. No, women dress up to impress other women.
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