Jappleseed101 Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 This girl messages me on Facebook about 4 weeks ago just saying hey. I didn't think much of it but we ended up kind of talking and really getting into it. I told her to just text me because it was more convient. Pretty much right away I asked her out to lunch. She said yes. At lunch we really hit it off. The next day was valentines day. I asked her to be my valentine and she said yes, I took her to lunch that day too. (I was paying for everything so far) at the lunch, I had a really good time and she did too and she asked what I was doing Sunday. We ended up setting an official date then where it was dinner and movies. Between that Thursday and Sunday, we talked endlessly and both webcam chat and texting and calling. I could tell she was crazy about me. On webcam chat, she looked me in the eyes and very sensually asked if I would kiss her on Sunday. She said she wanted to kiss me. I said yes. On sanday, I met her parents and took her out. After dinner in the parking lot of the movies, she said it was too cold to go out side, leaped across the center console and we started making out. It was amazing. After a little while, we went inside and cuddled in the movies and made out a little bit. I took her home and ended the night. The next Monday, she came over to my house, where we started a movie and 15 mins in, she was on top of me with her shirt off and bra off and making out. Am she grinding extremely hard as well. The next day, she came over all day, we did homework, watched tv, and I ended up getting her pants off. Things seemed like love was in the making. At one point, she even said I love you and then said she was sorry, it slipped out and didn't want to scare me. On the Wednesday, she told me that we were moving really fast and she wanted to slow down. I didn't know she meant like not date at all. I called her the next day to tell her good bye and that we probably wouldn't talk much anymore. She said bye and agreed. 5 mins after hanging up, she called back said that we should stil keep talking. Sice then, we talk all day, Skype and facechat for hours every night until she falls asleep talking to me. It's really sweet. We also went on a trip with our school and she sat with me on the long bus ride and cuddled with me and laid on me like she did before. She started talking about prom around me a lot and sending me pics of dresses and telling me she had no date. When I asked her to prom, she said she saw me as a friend. Also, since that terrible Wednesday, she still wants to go to lunch with me and she comes to my house and we get in bed together (nothing happens). We still hang out a lot. Here is the catch, she had a rough relationship history of people cheating on her and abuse and stuff. Her friends are telling her to not date anyone and I think she is nervous too. I don't know what to do because this girl talks to me all of the time and panics if I don't answer. She loves being with me but won't make a relationship out of it because she is worried that if we break up, she loses me. She is already losing me now as it is.
Cutiepie1976 Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 ... She started talking about prom around me a lot and sending me pics of dresses and telling me she had no date. When I asked her to prom, she said she saw me as a friend. Also, since that terrible Wednesday, she still wants to go to lunch with me and she comes to my house and we get in bed together (nothing happens). We still hang out a lot. Here is the catch, she had a rough relationship history of people cheating on her and abuse and stuff. Her friends are telling her to not date anyone and I think she is nervous too. I don't know what to do because this girl talks to me all of the time and panics if I don't answer. She loves being with me but won't make a relationship out of it because she is worried that if we break up, she loses me. She is already losing me now as it is. When rubber hits the road, and you ask her out, she declines because she sees you as a friend. Please listen to what she says and chooses! Everything else is noise, attention-grabbing, and you stroking her ego and constantly validating that she is attractive to boys. When a boy comes along who is boyfriend material, all her purported worries and nervousness about cheating and break-ups will miraculously vanish. She won't see him as just a friend. Please find someone else who will be happy to date you and will happily agree to let you take her to prom. Either that or sit around hoping, and have you chain yanked whenever she's in need of attention and validation. It will be a lot of work for almost no reward. 1
Djz05 Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 I feel for you. But sadly I agree that you should go find someone else. She's dragging you around, and that is never good. Tell her you want this to be a real repationship and if she hesitates and pulls out the "i have a bad history with relationships, can we just be friends" card, just leave. You don't want to deal with that drama. You can be the "nice understanding" guy and be a good friend, but soon as she sees someone else she prefers, she wont hesitate at all. And i mean get out now. 1
dasein Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 Girl is all over the map, very immature, plainly manipulative, and in all likelihood, had the intent of setting you up as a backburner prom date all along. She is "jumping on" other guys in the exact same way she jumped on you, don't believe otherwise, likely having sex with them, and one of those guys is her desired prom date. You are plan B or C, and an attention supply while she waits for plan A to come around. Don't play this game, and whatever you do, do not take her to prom if she comes back around wanting to go with you... it will be because the BBD didn't gel. Disengage from her entirely and go out and find a quality girl for a prom date. This one is not quality and will bring you nothing but drama and angst if you keep contact with her. Good luck.
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