Author miss_jaclynrae Posted March 11, 2013 Author Posted March 11, 2013 Of course you won't read it, because you're not really that mature or as grown up as you think you are. You had one bad/serious relationship that ended up in a bad divorce and now you think you've gotten it all figured out with a guy who's 10 years older than you. Keep making excuses of why not to listen to people, I already know you're the type of person who is only going to listen to the people that will blow smoke up her @ss and nod in agreement...shets predictable man. And this is what I mean't by me telling people to suck it. You have no idea about my experiences, about my past marriage, about my current relationship other than what I have told... and there is no way I could ever write out the whole story, because even then it wouldn't be enough to get you to suck it. Maybe you are right, blow smoke up my ass then and agree, because if that is the case you negative nancy know it all won't change anything.
ja123 Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 Good luck, Jacklyn! I hope it all works out. Statistically, I think Ninja knows what he's talking about; but, if he's a good man and treats you with love and respect ... well, stranger pairings have worked! All the best! It's nice to hear happy stories on here!
Ninjainpajamas Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 And this is what I mean't by me telling people to suck it. You have no idea about my experiences, about my past marriage, about my current relationship other than what I have told... and there is no way I could ever write out the whole story, because even then it wouldn't be enough to get you to suck it. Maybe you are right, blow smoke up my ass then and agree, because if that is the case you negative nancy know it all won't change anything. Can I please speak with your parent/guardian/daddy...I mean boyfriend, I would like to have a mature conversation about you young lady. 1
mesmerized Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 Look, you have to understand why you have some skeptics here. Being married and divorced already at 22 is enough of a reason for us to know that you don't tend to make your decisions with careful thinking and jump into things fast because they "feel" right. You can jump in people's throats who say otherwise but then why did you post this thread in the first place?
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted March 11, 2013 Author Posted March 11, 2013 Can I please speak with your parent/guardian/daddy...I mean boyfriend, I would like to have a mature conversation about you young lady. I am glad you find it funny. It really isn't... but thanks anyways for trying.
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted March 11, 2013 Author Posted March 11, 2013 Look, you have to understand why you have some skeptics here. Being married and divorced already at 22 is enough of a reason for us to know that you don't tend to make your decisions with careful thinking and jump into things fast because they "feel" right. You can jump in people's throats who say otherwise but then why did you post this thread in the first place? See, and that's what I mean, no one can even try to understand what happened with my marriage. I loved being marriage, I also worked very hard to try to salvage it. I would rather NOT go into why or why not I am no longer married. I am glad you all can judge my ability to make decisions off of the fact that I am a divorce at a young age.
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted March 11, 2013 Author Posted March 11, 2013 And I posted this because I ultimately feel blessed. And the sucky part is that I don't have many people to share it with. So here I am, gushing, because I want to. Because I can, and because why the heck not? 1
mesmerized Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 And I posted this because I ultimately feel blessed. And the sucky part is that I don't have many people to share it with. So here I am, gushing, because I want to. Because I can, and because why the heck not? Why are your friends against your relationship? Care to share?
xxoo Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 Keep communicating openly, use birth control, don't get married for at least another 18 months, and enjoy Maybe it will last; maybe it won't. No reason not to responsibly enjoy what you have right now.
Ninjainpajamas Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 I am glad you find it funny. It really isn't... but thanks anyways for trying. It's sad/funny...but more than anything I feel sorry for you, because you've had to have had a pretty damn fked up life to make the choices you have in your life for the reasons you do. Wasn't it about finding yourself jacynrae? wasn't it about never being dependent on a man again? wasn't it about fixing you and taking care of yourself....or did you forget about that self talk after you've gotten over the divorce of your last relationship.. If you've even gotten over it... And if you're not still extremely damaged from your experiences in your life from even before that... What about doing things for you and establishing your own identity? Isn't that something you've always wanted? or will you keep running into the arms of men who gives you that sense of "security"? Thinking you can do both things at once. I totally don't know what I'm talking about and see you miss_jaclynrae, I see your vulnerabilities and weakness more than you know. Once you commit and invest in this relationship, you will give everything to this man and build your life around him...I hope you remember this time to think about YOU in case this fairytale falls apart.
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted March 11, 2013 Author Posted March 11, 2013 Why are your friends against your relationship? Care to share? My best friend is extremely supportive. She loves him! She just happens to be the ONLY friend I have. She is a new mom too, so right now we don't get together much. She is the one who I baby sat for a few weeks ago.
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted March 11, 2013 Author Posted March 11, 2013 Keep communicating openly, use birth control, don't get married for at least another 18 months, and enjoy Maybe it will last; maybe it won't. No reason not to responsibly enjoy what you have right now. Check, check... and the last one ill check once the 18 months goes by
Author miss_jaclynrae Posted March 11, 2013 Author Posted March 11, 2013 It's sad/funny...but more than anything I feel sorry for you, because you've had to have had a pretty damn fked up life to make the choices you have in your life for the reasons you do. Wasn't it about finding yourself jacynrae? wasn't it about never being dependent on a man again? wasn't it about fixing you and taking care of yourself....or did you forget about that self talk after you've gotten over the divorce of your last relationship.. If you've even gotten over it... And if you're not still extremely damaged from your experiences in your life from even before that... What about doing things for you and establishing your own identity? Isn't that something you've always wanted? or will you keep running into the arms of men who gives you that sense of "security"? Thinking you can do both things at once. I totally don't know what I'm talking about and see you miss_jaclynrae, I see your vulnerabilities and weakness more than you know. Once you commit and invest in this relationship, you will give everything to this man and build your life around him...I hope you remember this time to think about YOU in case this fairytale falls apart. I am not going into this as blind sided as before trust me on that. On some levels you are correct, but on others you are truly wrong.
kaylan Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 Of course you won't read it, because you're not really that mature or as grown up as you think you are. You had one bad/serious relationship that ended up in a bad divorce and now you think you've gotten it all figured out with a guy who's 10 years older than you. Keep making excuses of why not to listen to people, I already know you're the type of person who is only going to listen to the people that will blow smoke up her @ss and nod in agreement...shets predictable man. Im with Ninja and mesmerized. OP, its all well and good that you are happy and optimistic...but you have to be realistic too. Despite your marriage and relationship experience, you are going down the road of a typical naive young adult. Why in the world would you rush a relationship, when you rushed one in the past before truly knowing the person you were with? I personally think moving in together needs at least a year (2 preferably) dating..and marriage needs at least 2 (better 3 years )for me. This guy is a lot more mature and experienced than you, and a recovering alcoholic,...plus he controls all the finances, supports you, and has the household vehicle.... why would you rush into something like this? And how can you not see why people see this as immature and rushed. Sure we can all wish you the best...but im a realist. Honey...hes a lot older than you and eventually I can see you desiring the fun young life as time rolls along. Plus you barely know him and he barely knows you...so now that youre really living together...as time moves on, we will see just how compatible you two are. The honeymoon phase, esp the first 6 months, arent the best indicator of how a relationship will fair. After the 12 month or 18 month mark is when things really get accurately assessed. Personally I dont see you guys making it to the fall. But prove me wrong. Ive seen this stuff time and time again...and theres a reason most relationships dont last until we are near ours 30s. Its because we arent very mature nor finished becoming who we are as adults in our early or mid 20s. Youre still growing up...hes done with that. Hes stable and running things...you are still trying to get on your feet. Lets see how this goes. But you need to start being realistic and take off the rose colored glasses. Be happy and optimistic...but get real honey.
Dragonfruit Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 (edited) Well, Miss Jaclynrae. You are cray cray like most 22 year olds of course, but quite adorable. Enjoy your happiness. I hope it lasts forever and ever. Here, have a pet bunny. Edited March 11, 2013 by Dragonfruit
iKING Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 Here, have a pet bunny. I want a pet bunny.. Sorry Jacyln, this one is mine. Prove everyone wrong, the odds are against you, but that doesn't mean you can't beat the odds. We'll be patiently waiting to see how this turns out. 1
Anela Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 He isn't THAT much older btw. Just 10 years, but he is bald... and grey. Therefore people tend to think he is a bit older than just 32. You look good together in your pictures. My sister married someone who is twenty-three years older than she is. It raised eyebrows when they were first together, but people who know them got used to it (although my mother didn't realize that he's going to turn 60 this year, and my sister just turned 36 - that threw her for a loop). I don't care about his age, I've only ever cared about the way he treats her. If there hadn't been drama in my life thanks to him, I wouldn't have a problem at all. Her husband is also a recovering alcoholic. He fell off the wagon more than once during the years, but apparently he's doing fine now.
JuneJulySeptember Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 You all can call me crazy, and tell me my relationship will fail due to it being unconventional in certain ways... But you all can suck it. We have spent every day together since day one, as well as almost every night. We have merged our lives together so easily neither one of us really made a huge notice of it. We have had our tiffs, but our fighting style is so perfect that it never gets truly out of hand. We talk. A LOT. We do monthly check ins to see how the other feels about where things are going. We inspire, support, and trust one another. I could seriously go on about just how PERFECT we are together but I would be here all day. All I know is that I have the relationship I have always dreamed of with a man who has put me first in his life. I officially moved in this week [A little ahead of schedule] and it has been a few weeks since I lost my job and car. It has been stressful but he is a constant support, and motivates me on the daily. Not to mention that for the first time in my life, I am in love with someone where we show our love so much there is no need to say it. We are a team and act like one. My family doesn't approve, people give us funny looks sometimes, but gosh darn, I wouldn't trade our life or relationship for anything. We have fun with it, make the best out of everyday and have become the best of friends. The biggest thing I have learned through this relationship? The minute you stop caring about what society, your friends, or your family says when it comes to love and how it "should be", the more intense that love becomes. Who cares if they don't understand it, just knowing that you both "get it" and find it worth keeping is enough. Congrats! I'm happy for you. You're a good poster. You seem well grounded despite being hot as h@ll. The constant "Where are we going with this?" conversations would be too much for me though.
veggirl Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 Jaclyn, I do hope it works out for you and I honestly mean that, you seem so happy and if its real it will last. I would never move as quickly as you have or advise anyone to do so, but hopefully it works out. The only thing that really, really gives me pause is you said in a recent thread you guys hadn't even said I Love You yet, so I HOPE that has changed!
outsidethebox Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 She's been dating the guy for months, we had a 32 page thread where we hashed out whether she should move in, if we wait any longer the guy will be balding and grey before she moves in. oh wait... 1
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 I hate to say it but whenever my family and friends were against me dating someone, they turned out to be right. And I mean like 100% of the time. 1
kaylan Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 She's been dating the guy for months, we had a 32 page thread where we hashed out whether she should move in, if we wait any longer the guy will be balding and grey before she moves in. oh wait... I lol'd 1
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 I lol'd Me too I am probably going to hell 1
mesmerized Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 Me too I am probably going to hell I'll welcome you. Its not as bad as people make it to be. Lol 3
MrCastle Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 I'll welcome you. Its not as bad as people make it to be. Lol It's different for the rest of us who are not from there.
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