Stone cold Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 (edited) She broke up with me over a fight we always had. Saying I don't make her feel loved enough etc. we spent a lot of time together but she was upset we never went out enough. We met in 1st year university and stayed together for 5 years. I had to pay for my own schooling and work while her parents paid for hers and she basically just sat at home and bored and needy. Basically I couldn't afford enough outings. The break up happens like many in our past. She went to a party with her friends and lied about it. She becomes friends with a new guy on Facebook. We broke up in October before Halloween. We stopped talking completely. I would send a hey etc text here and there with no reply. Xmas rolls around and I get in touch with her. She says we're never getting back together etc. I asked her if there's someone else she says no. New Years comes around and we talk on the phone for about an hour and cry to each other. She says she wants me to leave her alone forever n that shes on depression medication because of me. I say fine but ask if there's someone else. Again she says no. I see a picture of downtown on her Facebook and she deletes me after. I noticed the guys name and check out his Instagram he has a pic of the same building a gift from his new girlfriend and a gift he got for her. It suddenly hits me she lied to me and was seeing someone 4-6 weeks later. She told me she loved me and can't guarantee if we get back but if we cross paths again we can. As if she may use me as a plan B down the line. I told her ill let you go because they say if you love something set it free. She said that's exactly how she feels. At this point from New Years I go strict no contact because of what I found out. It was confirmed when her birthday rolls around (few days ago) when he posted another pic but if her and her truck with balloons because of her birthday but her face is blocked by her truck door. To me it seemed like a mind game like she knew I would be stalking her. This was only a few days ago. The photo was definitely her because its her truck and her body size the same day as her birthday and color of car. The thing that troubles me was there's no pics from valentines day. Personally i feel betrayed and don't think I could ever take her back after this. Even if this guy is only a rebound or if its a mind game. Today I ripped up all her love letters cards threw away all gifts from her deleted all emails and 1000s of photos from the past 5 years. I have been in NC for 2.5 months and plan on staying it forever. She hasn't reached out either. I just want to move on and be happy. What would you do? I mean we were planning on getting married next year Ps. I didn't say happy valentines or happy birthday to her. She can F off. Edited March 10, 2013 by Stone cold
drpepper1886 Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 Don't be a plan B and continue to move on, you're doing the right thing. As Stone Cold would do. As Austin 3:16 says "I just whipped your ass!" Best revenge is a life well lived.
Minneloa Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 I think you answered your own question: "I just want to move on and be happy." You are on the right track.
SimonSerenade Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 I think it all comes down to how you feel man, if you want her back out of your love for me then yeah maybe but if your doing it for desperation, your doing it for all the wrong reasons, 90% of the time people want people back out of there own insecurities over the break up, it's easier to take someone back and believe there lies than face those lies head on and deal with the pain, it sounds to me like this girl doesn't know what she wants and she's keeping you around as back up, this guy is probably a rebound like you say and even if it is what it is, that's still a hard image to get out of your head, with or without her, personally once someone else steps into the frame I'm out for good and if they regret it then that's there own damn fault, this girl is blaming you for her being on meds, sounds like she's got some problems, don't take her word on that, I'd give her a big FU and never talk to her again but that's just me, if you love her and think she's being legit about everything then maybe it is forgivable but don't take yourself for granted man, the fact your on here means your a good person with feelings, don't sell yourself short and make sure it's what you really want because there's all kinds of women out there and if she's making you feel this bad and being this careless with your feelings then I don't think she's worth it and I think there's someone else out there who'll treat you real good, love and respect your feelings, make you feel like the fish and chips
Amelie1980 Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 You will regret destroying all of her letters etc. I did. I have nothing left.from my first boyfriend and I wouldn't mind seeing it now.
Author Stone cold Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 (edited) You will regret destroying all of her letters etc. I did. I have nothing left.from my first boyfriend and I wouldn't mind seeing it now. Why would I regret it? They were loaded with false promises of never leaving me and never being with anyone but me kind of crap. It felt great. Even if she comes back which I really am starting to care less about I will let her know this so she will get hurt and know how much she hurt me. **** her Edit: there's also no memory triggers left for me to think of her. She put the entire blame of the breakup on me and didn't take accountability for anything. I don't want to remember her Edited March 10, 2013 by Stone cold
Jono85 Posted March 11, 2013 Posted March 11, 2013 Why would I regret it? They were loaded with false promises of never leaving me and never being with anyone but me kind of crap. It felt great. Even if she comes back which I really am starting to care less about I will let her know this so she will get hurt and know how much she hurt me. **** her Edit: there's also no memory triggers left for me to think of her. She put the entire blame of the breakup on me and didn't take accountability for anything. I don't want to remember her this is exactly what my ex did. blamed everything on me. she never took ANY accountability for anything and never has post BU. these girls are so f*cking selfish and just stopped caring for us. f*ck em. you did the right thing. there will DEF be days ahead when you feel like saying 'f*ck it' and be the bigger person, and not be resentful, etc etc etc and reach out to let her know you're ok and don't hate her. but don't. they truly don't deserve us relieving any shred of guilt they might have. to think i considered wishing my ex happy bday this week...so glad i didn't. just gotta remember how f*cking cold she was post BU. it was gutless.
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