McDonald Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 So This week has been really good to me. its been my first week in which I have been able to feel good about myself. However, at the end of the week is the weekend. A time in which theres no school, work or really any planned thing to do. This is where I get sent back. We had a party last night at my house I live in with 20 other guys. its a big house right next to campus.. there was easily 100 other girls here... yet... I couldnt talk to one... even after consuming a good amount of liquor. I ended up going to my room and just breaking down.. then threw up because I had too much to drink at that point. Where I am getting at is this: I am fine during the week. Starting to feel on top of the world, but then the weekend comes and I go back to feeling like sh*t. The urges to talk to her come back, to go by her place etc. Does anyone else have a very hard time with the weekends? Also, I am coming to realize that this problem is no longer about the relationship... this is about me and my social skills. Which I seem to be lacking. 1
The Tallest One Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 I'm in the same boat! I work full-time during the week but weekends I don't have much going on and still trying to get used to not being with her! You probably have more friends than me and you probably have a bigger social circle than me, I'm 43 and have two kids who I only see on Saturdays! Most of my friends are married and busy with there families! I kinda hate weekends sometimes!
Author McDonald Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 I have oppritunities to go out... but I do... just I dont really have fun. Weekends hurt because its when I would usually spend a lot of time with my ex. my fault though for becoming codependant on this person.
CudLRoo Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 Seems you're well on your way, M. Few more weeks, few more weeks...
Author McDonald Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 Seems you're well on your way, M. Few more weeks, few more weeks... ITs getting so close. MY eyes are starting to burn because i can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. My friend just came up to me and asked me if I ended up "hooking up" with that girl from last night.... I do not recall any of this lol. I guess the night wasnt as bad as I thought. 1
CudLRoo Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 Just look what follows in the wake of the PAIN....! (rubs the belly of the Buddha)
Author McDonald Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 Just look what follows in the wake of the PAIN....! (rubs the belly of the Buddha) hahah. If only I could fully just let go of whatever Im still holding onto. Wish I could figure it out.
Author McDonald Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 actually I dont think im holding onto anything... jsut missing a little bit of it.. which is natural I guess.
CudLRoo Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 You'll NEVER fully get rid. But you will come to a point where you won't even think about going back to her. It's like a 'collection' in your heart, the ones you won, the ones you lost, the ones you never had (and all the differing shades inbetween).
Author McDonald Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 Thats a good way to put it. So I guess there still is a little feeling left somewhere. Once that is gone, then ill be good. What else can i do though to let go completely? I mean... Im really doing everything I have wanted to do and am doing everything that I did before the relationship now. Im kinda upset that fact too. I mean, I was happy before we were dating... so I thought if I can get myself to how I was before, then i should be completely happy again. Here I am. At that point, but dont feel 100%. Strange how I think having her back will fix it all. But it will only make things worse for now.
CudLRoo Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 ^It'll never go but *time* will move you on. Once you stop bothering about how 'special' the ex was, you'll start to notice some flaws. And when another girl is giving you affection in this state, you'll find it really easy to find that affection far more preferable than a brick wall that stops you moving on with your life. I love ALL my exes, and I'll never forget about them because they were all very special in some way. I'll never forget about them, in fact I think about my last ex quite a lot of the time, but more in the way of what a great and fair and loving person she was, not because I wanna get back. If you truly love someone at some point, then that love should last, even when you break up. Tbh, I don't even feel this girl has done you any justice, she just seems a bit unworthy of being fucced over about. She doesn't even care. If you're starting to feel well, then you dodged a bullet - NAY - a *very* large torpedo.
Author McDonald Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 Well she showed me that it is possible for me to get a girlfriend lol. I always knew that I was a good guy.... she was just the first to say that she wanted to date me. There have been others to like me... just never my types. but you are right... I kinda feel like a dodged a bullet. She made me stop talking to friends who were girls cause she thought I would leave her...... I should have had the cajones to tell her "listen, you have to be able to trust me" etc... then I should have jsut walked out cause she couldnt trust me I gues.. at least I learned not to let anyone make me change myself. and this other girl better come fast lol. i feel once i find someone else... then I can stop longing for my ex and our relationship.
Author McDonald Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 Ive been thinking though... How does one just jump to someone else like that? She bought plane tickets to visit me over winter break and it was her idea.. 3 days after she tells me she has been talking to someone else... Its just those things that I do not understand.
na49 Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 Ive been thinking though... How does one just jump to someone else like that? She bought plane tickets to visit me over winter break and it was her idea.. 3 days after she tells me she has been talking to someone else... Its just those things that I do not understand. She may not have actually bought the plane tickets. Why do they lead us on for as long as they do when they are talking to other people behind our backs? Why do they tell us that they love us when they don't? Why can they move on so quickly from us and be so happy we're gone? I have no f*cking idea. but to answer your original question, yes weekends are definitely worse for me. I was out all night last night, so she didn't really cross my mind at all.
Author McDonald Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 @NA- I know she did because she was all excited that she bought them and took a picture of them and showed me. Im glad you were able to go out this weekend and have fun! See, we dont need our exes for our own fun. @fooledtwice- You make great points. I have realized that pretty girls will always have someone waiting. Thats what kinda sucks... She had no copeing period. Literally from me to him in a matter of weeks. Then theres me, trying to be loyal. So no girls lined up for my rebound. And I find getting back into the game extremely difficult. Especially when Im somewhat thinking about her. However, its more of the idea of a partner that I miss. And since she was my first,, Shes the partner that I miss... sucks. Well, I believe as well that two people will become codependendant. Thats how people move in with eachother, marry etc. Just... I let myself give up friends, a good social life... because thats what she wanted me to do. SO now, Im more alone than if I wasnt to give those things up. So.... idk I guess its okay to become codependendant if you dont forget your life before her and who you are as an individual. Thats what happened to me. Sadly, thats what I thought she was as well. WEll Im sure she was, till the very end...
singme2sleep Posted March 10, 2013 Posted March 10, 2013 Same here! I can be ok all week long, but the weekend brings me down every time. If I don't stay busy, I get sad and let my mind wander what he could be doing.
Author McDonald Posted March 10, 2013 Author Posted March 10, 2013 Exactly. Friday night I was out having fun.. But then yesterday was just boring and thus, she was on my mind. And today isnt that much better because I have to study for finals and usually we would always study together...
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