Steve11 Posted March 8, 2013 Posted March 8, 2013 I've asked for it back. She said she'd give it to a mutual fried because its too hard to see me. That was 4 days ago. We've been broken up for two weeks now. Why hasn't she given my stuff back? I'm struggling to move on because I'm over analysing all these different scenarios. If I had my stuff and she took hers, it's over. I don't want to contact again
amaysngrace Posted March 8, 2013 Posted March 8, 2013 What stuff does she have that's yours? Anything that can't be replaced?
Author Steve11 Posted March 8, 2013 Author Posted March 8, 2013 Clothes, computer, CDs etc All serious stuff. I just thought she'd want rid of them straight away. It feels like the breakup is dragging on because of it. I told her how I felt, which she said it had to be this way. So, why keep hold of it? I don't want to have to contact again because I look desperate.
amaysngrace Posted March 8, 2013 Posted March 8, 2013 Why don't you go there and see if she's home and then get them yourself?
Author Steve11 Posted March 8, 2013 Author Posted March 8, 2013 I asked if I could pop round next week, and she said no, it'll be too hard to see me.
amaysngrace Posted March 8, 2013 Posted March 8, 2013 Screw that....go get your stuff. Why are you only caring about her comfort level and disregarding your own? Go get your things.
Author Steve11 Posted March 8, 2013 Author Posted March 8, 2013 It was an amicable break, even tho I'm struggling & if she doesnt want to see me then its fine, but she said she'd take it round a friends and that friend said nothing. I just don't want to contact her again.
Author Steve11 Posted March 9, 2013 Author Posted March 9, 2013 It's been nearly 4 days NC, it's been 15 days since the breakup. I don't want to have to break NC to get my things back, as I've done all the contacting and don't want to come across desperate, needy Etc Should I wait for her to contact saying she's dropped it off? Or ask her again?
TaraMaiden Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 Jeezusjkerrist, they're 'things'!! If you've managed to function like a normal human being without them up to now, you can do without them all together! If, on the other hand, you feel they're things which will severely inhibit your day to day existence if you DON'T get them back - then logically, it naturally follows that you're going to HAVE to break NC to get them back! Pack all her stuff in a box. Go - with a friend - to her place. Knock. Let your buddy hand her the box. Get your friend to ask: "Where's all his stuff?" Hopefully, she will reply. Get your friend to ask her to bring it all to the door, please. Check it's all there. Leave. Sorted.
Author Steve11 Posted March 9, 2013 Author Posted March 9, 2013 It's exphensive stuff. I don't know why she wouldn't of got rid of it already? i thought once youve dumped someone, you'd want their stufd gone. I'll wait til tomorrow, if I've heard nothing, I'll ask for it again.
TaraMaiden Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 No. Follow my plan. What makes you believe waiting one extra day will actually change anything here? Just do it. Get it over and done with. And the element of surprise is going to work a lot better than anything else.
Author Steve11 Posted March 9, 2013 Author Posted March 9, 2013 I know this so crazy, but I want her back. I thought that her keeping hold of my stuff is her way of keeping ties, but it's stupid of me thinking that way & it's meant that I haven't moved on yet.
amaysngrace Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 Then why did you say it's about your stuff? Go get your things and before you leave ask her if she wants to go out tonight. Staying stuck in your head won't do you any good. Express yourself to her. The worse that can happen is you don't get the girl...newsflash....you already don't have the girl. Or your stuff...
Author Steve11 Posted March 9, 2013 Author Posted March 9, 2013 I asked 4 days ago to meet up to pick my things up & she said its be too hard to see me so she'd give it to a mutual friend. I've seen that friend a couple of times and they haven't mentioned anything, I didn't bring the subject up. I don't know if I should leave it a bit to give her space, or just get it over and done with.
amaysngrace Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 I asked 4 days ago to meet up to pick my things up & she said its be too hard to see me so she'd give it to a mutual friend. I've seen that friend a couple of times and they haven't mentioned anything, I didn't bring the subject up. I don't know if I should leave it a bit to give her space, or just get it over and done with. Stop thinking so much and just go get your things back. Geez...heaven forbid you had a real dilemma.
Author Steve11 Posted March 9, 2013 Author Posted March 9, 2013 Yeah, you're right. I'm still clinging onto a bit of hope. It's not helping.
Recommended Posts