I actually broke no contact. And I feel better given the result

[creighton0123]

My ex broke up with me over GIGS and gave ever reason under the sun, leaving our apartment five minutes later. That was a month ago.

 

Yesterday, we were emailed simultaneously over something we had to take care of re: money. While I felt I shouldn't have, I emailed him a separate email afterwards explaining some of my confusion and anger about the whole thing, concluding with "I can and will move on, of course. I just... wish I didn't have to."

 

I regretted hitting send after I did, but his response 12 hours later was perfect: a clear and concise explanation that he regretted not having communicated with me when he knew he was having doubts about the relationship and felt he had lost the emotional investment he once had, waiting four or five months, and then ending so spontaneously: something he recognized as extremely unfair to me.

 

I honestly felt relief at a solid answer and a heartfelt apology for the one thing that was holding me back from moving on (the spontaneity of it).

 

In the end, no contact was right for me. I broke it when I needed to and am glad at having done so. I will now resume no contact simply because we aren't a part of eachother's lives anymore and be able to move on knowing that I had a great relationship with him that simply didn't work out.

 

[Amelie1980]

I couldn't ever feel that way

[destroyed4sho]

did he give you a specific reason of why he was having doubts of the relationship? Was it someone else? Arguing?

[creighton0123]

Destroyed: not someone else. Not arguing. Just that he felt he wasn't developing a deeper connection that he hoped to have.

 

That is understandable. We did a year long distance and a year in the same city. After six months in the same city, we moved in together for 8 months. Half way through that, he came to the conclusion that his feelings weren't as genuine as they should have been.

 

It is completely understandable. I, myself, have broken up with guys in the past for the very same reason. I only stated that reason outright and didn't let the relationship drag out for 2 years. Then again, I'm more in touch with my emotions and more capable than most of communicating them and expressing them.