Author irc333 Posted March 9, 2013 Author Posted March 9, 2013 She doesn't fancy you. That's such a "silly answer"...oh wait.... 1
sillyanswer Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 That's such a "silly answer"...oh wait.... Best answer you'll get. Don't over-think it... beyond basic hygiene issues and not dressing like you live in a ditch, attraction doesn't really lend itself to too much analysis. 1
xxoo Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 I'm reading through some of the advice in this thread. However, I'm skipping over the "you must get her panties wet" part. I completely ignore the advice that probably works when your in your wild college years, but that's about the extent of it. That being said, I'm looking for answers other than that. Women don't stop wanting passion after college.
xxoo Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 This makes a bit more sense, trying to reflect on some encounters with women.....I think that sometimes.....I would throw a flirt out at the person, or try to get a little closer, and they don't come back with a flirtaceous retort. I think there was a few times where women got upset with me for not wanting to be friends with them, though I wanted to date them. One was a State counselor, apparently she thought that since I could not be friends with her, it would set me up for some kind of problems with women in the future. Yeah, she was using her expert knowledge to "shame me" or make me think there was something wrong with me that I could not be friends with women. In fact, I had quite a few women think ill of me because I didn't want to be their friend. I said, "Just add on, "....that I'm attracted to." at the end...and it made sense to her. She said , "Yeah, I have experienced some men not wanting to be friends with me, because they wanted to date me....but...thankfully, they are STILL my friends today, and apparently they have no problem like YOU do with being my friend". Basically put....she made me think I was an ******* for not wanting to keep things platonic with her....while her other GUY friends seems to have no issues with it. I did turn it around by saying, "Well, you have a point, a guy could have several female friends...esp. in these group outings....but EVENTUALLY he'll come across a woman he won't want to be 'buddies' with......because he's ga-ga over her". I was making her feel the reality of the situation....eventually after so many men wanted to date her, she even accepted that fact. THis woman I'm about to see this weekend, she has had a few photos with her men out at "outings" together. One was at a fancy dinner club...both dressed very nicely....few photos up of them on Facebook. Her friends thought they were dating, and she had to disqualify that notion and explain "We're just friends" to everyone. Other men are left wondering, on her FB photos, I saw one with her with a guy, a bit more "close" to each other in the photos, I dunno, maybe trying to keep warm....but I might ask if she's seeing anyone....during our "date" and allure it to my interest in her by saying, "I just want to make sure, don't want to make your new boyfriend jealous, who ever he is, LOL!" Allude to my interest in her. I should get a T-shirt that says, "Don't think I'm an ******* for not wanting to be your friend, hon." lol. Forget the friends stuff. If they don't want to date you, waste no time analyzing why they care if you are friends. Move on. Flirt with many women. Have fun with it. Some will flirt back, and you should focus on them.
ChessPieceFace Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 The only blanket answers would be the types of behavioral things in pickup guides. Eye contact and types of flirting and whatever else. Some of them might work... I can't tell you whether that's what you want to do though. But yeah, compatibility isn't attraction.
Imported Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 Here are my guesses. I would bet that you are not aggressive enough and that you don't come across as passionate. I've noticed that women can get past a good many of your flaws so long as you display a truly burning desire for her... and not just physically. You should change your board name to "Playing_With_Fire". 1
Author irc333 Posted March 9, 2013 Author Posted March 9, 2013 I do believe that compatibility DOES play a factor in attraction, I"m sure some do here agree. Also, if you get too physical too soon, then you might be taking 2 or 3 steps back with that woman....so one has to be able to READ the woman correctly and her level on how she is with you in your presence. You have to be able to read body language, yes? So if her body language doesn't indicate she wants you to kiss her...then...don't kiss her...otherwise it could have bad repercussions....and you'd be taking a couple of steps back with that woman, because you didn't read her right. Like, if she touches you on the arm, when she's talking with you....she might have SOME degree of interest in you. Or the way she has her body directed when conversing with her. If you don't carry yourself in a fashion in a way that you're attractive
xxoo Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 Touch HER arm, and see if she responds with warmth or coldness. If you gradually increase the intimacy, you'll either see signs of encouragement or discouragement. At some point, a kiss is a natural next step--not a big risk.
somedude81 Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 This thread is so funny. Compatibility, common interests, similar personalities and humor. None of it is relevant. All that matters is how good looking you are.
bolase Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 Wrong. It matters if you are attracted to the person and feel the 'thing' with them; they make your heart beat a little bit faster. They might be only 'attractive' in your eyes, or very good looking but you dont feel attraction! I don't feel attracted to this friend who wants to date me, right. He's got a nice face and he's ripped from army training. His slight conservatism, way of talking, views, body language...some stuff that i guess puts me off; I could never feel the spark. He actually sent me a message saying he thinks and feels we could be something better than friends and i should reconsider my response that i just wanted to be friends; as though it was some decision I made from a place of logic not attraction/spark! essentially this guy was OP.
Eggplant Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 This thread is so funny. Compatibility, common interests, similar personalities and humor. None of it is relevant. All that matters is how good looking you are. It all matters. I've turned down a hot guy, successful, because there was no connection. All of his success and hotness did me no good. Both kinds of attraction are essential. 1
somedude81 Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 It all matters. I've turned down a hot guy, successful, because there was no connection. All of his success and hotness did me no good. Both kinds of attraction are essential. So then, compatibility and connection only matters if looks alone are not enough. Still, for many women, looks is all they need.
bolase Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 Wrong. Looks are never enough because looks aren't feelings. See both posts above yours. How do you not get that? Are you a robot?
somedude81 Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 Wrong. Looks are never enough because looks aren't feelings. See both posts above yours. How do you not get that? Are you a robot? You're not very observant are you? Plenty of women throw themselves at hot guys without knowing anything about him.
xxoo Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 You're not very observant are you? Plenty of women throw themselves at hot guys without knowing anything about him. Sure, hot guys will always get attention from some women. How does the rest of mankind manage to marry and reproduce if it is all about looks??
fortyninethousand322 Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 It's not all about looks. It's about attractiveness. Many times attractiveness manifests itself in outer appearance, but sometimes it doesn't and it just a subconscious thing picked up by our bodies in a desire to reproduce with high value genes. 1
GoodOnPaper Posted March 9, 2013 Posted March 9, 2013 Sure, hot guys will always get attention from some women. How does the rest of mankind manage to marry and reproduce if it is all about looks?? Some of us make due with whom we can get and hope it can make up for an unsuccessful single life. On the latter part, there are pros and cons.
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