Been 2 weeks, but it's getting harder, in particular the NC part. Missing her badly

[Ryan_B]

2 weeks ago Today (6 days after valentines day) my girlfriend of 7 months split up from me. We are both 20 and she was my first ever girlfriend and love.We had had a few arguments over the past few months, but on the whole we were extremely close. She has previously been in a 3 year relationship and was engaged, but she told me 3 months ago she said nobody has ever made her as happy and feel as loved as me. We always went out, for drives, days out, spent most of our time together, staying at each others etc. It was perfect. We even went on a weeks holiday for valentines, and it was really special, a lovely week. But when we got home I fell ill for a couple of days and so I didn't see her/contact her for 2 days. But when we next spoke (on skype) we had an argument. She started asking for time alone and space, and I said it's fine, but just asked when I can next see her, she got angry for whatever reason and went offline. The next day (I had been expecting it but trying to deny it) she ended things with me. She said I am a really special Guy, I never mistreated her and she was happy with me. She said there's no bad bone in my body, but she can't carry on with us. She wants to live the single life for a while. She told me that she wants to remain close friends (in fact her exact words were ''I'd really love to just be very special friends. The way we were for the months I knew you before we got together. The times we went out and had a laugh, went to theme parks etc. I want that again, we can be such close friends. I just don't love you anymore in a romantic way, but I still love you, so much, as a person and as a friend''). I told her that I can't be friends right now, because I love her, so much, and my feelings for her are sky high. It'd be impossible to have her just as a friend right now. But I did tell her that in the future, if my love and feelings die and I don't want her in a relationship type way, then I'd love to have her in my life as a friend, more than anything. She understood and just said she hopes it happen. I told her I will delete her numbers, facebook and Skype, just so I can't get tempted to message her, she said it's upsetting but she understands. So if I ever feel I can just be friends it's down to me to re-add her etc, so she can't contact me first, it was a mutual decision to do this. The thing is, 2 weeks later, the temptation to contact her is increasing. I'm missing her, more than I've ever missed anyone/thing before, and still love her so much. I keep thinking of all the good times we had, from cuddling in bed most nights, to going away on holidays, and theme parks, the weekly drives we had, the jokes we shared, everything. And it brings a lump in my throat all the time. No matter what I do, see my friends, go out, go to pub, anything, she's constantly in my mind. It's hell, I love her and would do anything to be back with her, but that's not what she wants (she told my friend). What do I do? It's even got to the point of writing out a text, asking my friend for her number and sending it too her, only for my friend telling me it's a bad idea so wouldn't give me the number. This is killing me inside, please help.

[Ryan_B]

Feeling even worse Tonight. It was actually around this time of the day, 2 weeks ago, that she ended it. I keep thinking ''I'm so fed up, and feel so lonely, for the last 7 months, right now I'd be with her, out on a drive, or round mine/hers. We'd be happy, full of love and laughter. But instead I'm sitting here, feeling miserable, empty, fed up, upset, just want to break down''. It's getting worse, day by day, this is hell. I never thought I'd feel like this, I can imagine what we would be doing, where we would be, what we'd be talking about, everything, if I was with her now, I should be with her right now. I don't know what to do, any advice would be so appreciated, thank you

[Steve11]

I feel your pain. I'm 2 weeks aswell & it's utter ****. I suppose all we have is time, but it doesn't really make a difference at the moment.

 

You're not alone in these feelings

[coralie]

More sympathies from me here as well. You are most definitely not alone. I'm going crazy from missing him and NC doesn't feel any better at all.

 

But you know what? It'll be worse if you contact her, that I'm sure of. You might possibly feel better for a split second but you'll feel so much worse afterwards and then you'll be back to square one as if those two weeks didn't happen. Because the only thing that'll really make you feel better is something she can't give you. Don't do it. Try to find a way to distract yourself. Go out, go exercise, go do something fun, or even take a walk, talk to friends, talk to annoying people even, if you have to. Just take your mind off of her as much as you can. The really horrible pain comes and goes and when you're feeling unbearable, try to find a way to distract yourself until it's somewhat less torturous.