McDonald Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 UGH so I decided to type the OM into facebook and of course new profile pic with her... then my curiosity got the best of me and well... you know what happened next. Funny, no urges to look at hers though.... only the OM...... So I should block him.. I mean, im only doing this to myself. Funny how this works. Funny that I have been giving all this advice, know what I should and shouldnt do... but it just doesnt get through. maybe seeing things like this will help me realize that it is OVER and has been. I shouldnt be chasing someone who wants nothing to do with me.. who will throw my feelings back at my face and laugh and walk away. So F it. F all of what has happened to me. I have carried this out long enough. I am tired, I am sick, I am worn down from all of this. Rebound? why not Indifferent? WEll no.... but close to not carrying because im just pissed 1
thekarmacist Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 hey....why not focus some of that energy on caring for yourself? why are you flogging a dead horse? why do you insist on making yourself feel worse? he is not the problem. she is. 1
Author McDonald Posted March 6, 2013 Author Posted March 6, 2013 I feel like she isnt the problem anymore either.. she was the start of the problem.. but she is gone now. I am my own problem.
thekarmacist Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 this new guy isn't better than you. he's just different. do you really think he's going to get any better than you got?
Author McDonald Posted March 6, 2013 Author Posted March 6, 2013 no. This guy is a loser.... So idk what her problem is lol. Girls are telling me that Im better looking then him and nicer.. so that helps the ego. Its just the fact that she left for him. However, I do just have to move on because she doesnt deserve what I have to offer.. she would even say at times that she doesnt deserve me...
CudLRoo Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 You need to stop it mate. It gets creepy and obsessive when you start obsessing over Facebook, it's *really* unhealthy. It's why I don't use it. Twitter, neither. Nothing. It's less complex. I sense you're a nice guy but this stuff can send certain people all Hannibal Lecter. "I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti, f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f".
Author McDonald Posted March 6, 2013 Author Posted March 6, 2013 it doesnt happen that often anymore. I am much better than before and right now, feel pretty much over it. Its not worth my time chasing something thats not there
CudLRoo Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 ^You're taking the right attitude man. It's HARD. Just be a soldier, or even aim to be a bit mercenary with OLD (just got a date not ten minutes ago, and visually very pleasing). My heart's not even in it but it's creating some MOVEMENT from my irking fixation. And it's nice to know I still hold some *power*, even though I hath fallen greatly. Anyway, mate, I sincerely wish you the best in your endeavours, and hope you manage to shake that beast off yo back, for it is *blightin'* yo azz. You're not a bad guy, it's just the probability of her wanting to be with you is likely - and clearly - pretty low. You need to do some weights, get angry, drunk, angry/drunk, knock a few alphas out, then get back on the dancefloor of life, it's always nicer when you feel a little more sturdy.
Author McDonald Posted March 6, 2013 Author Posted March 6, 2013 Figuring out my life right now is my number 1 propriety. Not her. I allowed myself to give up a lot to be with her... So I'm going to get myself back
cdt76 Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 Hey Mac, at least your girl didn't choose a life of stripping over being with you. I just found out that little kernal of good news today. I must love being an idiot! Block her, him, her friends, their friends, get off facebook if you have too. Do what's best for you brother
Author McDonald Posted March 6, 2013 Author Posted March 6, 2013 thanks guys for the input. Its been almost 4 months now.. and it has gotten a lot better. Theres just this part of me that is thinking maybe i should say something, but I know I cant. The only reason for this is because for the first time in this whole mess, I feel like I did something wrong now, the post,... and my mind is saying I should at least put my self in the right.
cdt76 Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 Doesn't matter at this point if you did anything wrong. It's ok. Forgive yourself and move on. You don't need to make it right with her. She is doing that on her own. Just make it right with you. Change who you are in order to become a better you so that whatever mistakes you made this time are less likely to happen in the future.
CudLRoo Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 Theres just this part of me that is thinking maybe i should say something, but I know I cant. Just think of it as damage limitation, for yourself. Whatever you're gonna say/send, she doesn't want to hear, so the more you try and interact with her, the more she'll be annoyed and the less she'll respect you. She's got him now, and it might work, might not work, but at the moment she's at the polar opposite direction to you in life, and it'll stay that way 'til the rest of her relationship with the new guy pans out. Don't say ANYTHING. Concentrate on your own mental health and your personal dignity, because picking the scab will only make more blood come out of the wound.
Mr Reptile Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 UGH so I decided to type the OM into facebook and of course new profile pic with her... then my curiosity got the best of me and well... you know what happened next. Funny, no urges to look at hers though.... only the OM...... So I should block him.. I mean, im only doing this to myself. Funny how this works. Funny that I have been giving all this advice, know what I should and shouldnt do... but it just doesnt get through. maybe seeing things like this will help me realize that it is OVER and has been. I shouldnt be chasing someone who wants nothing to do with me.. who will throw my feelings back at my face and laugh and walk away. So F it. F all of what has happened to me. I have carried this out long enough. I am tired, I am sick, I am worn down from all of this. Rebound? why not Indifferent? WEll no.... but close to not carrying because im just pissed This. I've wondered if it's a good method, not the best, to do. It will be the hard way, and will hurt, but wouldn't it also make you realize "Forget it right now it's over, you've seen it with your own eyes. Move on and find another one." IMO I think this can be done after some months of NC, just to help you out to keep moving forward and stop dwelling about the past. I've not done it, but for you who have: Did it make you move on easier to see them with their new partner?
Author McDonald Posted March 6, 2013 Author Posted March 6, 2013 Your right. I should make it right with myself. Not with her. I just feel like saying that will make it right for myself... As I'm not concerned about a response that much. Then again, like you said, I shouldn't pick at the scab. Just. Alright about 5 minutes ago I was walking to class and she was walkin the other way towards me. I had to turn and go another way. Before I posted that dumb message, I was able to walk past her. I was able to say hi because I felt like the bigge person. I wasnt at fault. Now I can't see her. I'm embarrassed. That's not where I wanted to be at this point....that's why I feel like trying to make it right I'm terms of seeing them together, well it sure as hell hurts. More than anything... But it made me realize it was done. And I stopped chasing the relationship in a way. However... It gave me a mindset to try to win her back. Just be careful
na49 Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 What does OM mean? also block him. block her. I'm just as bad as you are with the ridiculous thoughts but you have to try to help yourself. Also I wonder about if I should just take a peek at the ex's facebook, see her and another dude kissing. See her write all of the love quotes she used to write about me. Writing all about how this new guy is "the one" and her love for him is "real". I just know how much that would f*ck with my head. I would have so much trouble getting over that, it would be all that I would think about for weeks. If the guy she's with now is the guy she cheated on me, I'd be heart broken. If she's single, I'd probably call her and talk to her and run the risk of being told "I don't love you anymore". If she's dating someone completely different, I'd be heart broken because she'd rather date someone else instead of trying things with me again. How can I win exactly?
Toddbt12y1 Posted March 6, 2013 Posted March 6, 2013 OM = Other-man. You are only hurting yourself. I do not know what else to say. Especially since, LS is annoying me lately.
Author McDonald Posted March 7, 2013 Author Posted March 7, 2013 I got some good stories for you guys..... most wont like what I did.... but for once I feel free!!!!! Like really feeling like Im over it. I wont discuss what Idid right now lol because its still too fresh and i want to see if what I did actually helped me before talking about it.. However in other news I was thinking...Okay so you know how I was saying I feel like I back tracked because now I have to ignore her... I feel like im at fault now etc etc. Well I was thinking.. maybe its not that Im embarrassed for saying what I said online. That could be a little bit of it. But maybe Im at the point where i actaully just dont want to see her anymore. Because today we were going to pass eachother until I turned the other way. I know she saw me do that too. So.. I think im actually not wanting to see her now. Before I would be upset when she didnt say hi.. but now I dont want even to see her!! because Im getting to the point where I dont want to be friends, and I forsure do not want a relationship... so theres really nothing left. and with that mindset goes the last connection. That final thing holding me back... I can now let go. This probably didnt make any sense... but to me it did.
Recommended Posts