WantanS4 Posted September 5, 2004 Posted September 5, 2004 Everyone, I'm sure some of you know what I have been through/am going through. With this in mind, those of you hoping for a second chance should reconsider your motives for that second chance. It has been almost 4 months now, and I haven't had a hint of peace. I thirst for it sooo deeply, as I am sure most of you out there with a broken heart do too. But peace will not come to us unless (in our minds) that person returns to refill the empty slot they so cruelly made on their departure. And this is the reason why a second chance is out of the question. I know, that my ex is LIVING IT UP, and in some ways has done a complete ABOUT FACE in the person she was/I remember her to be. Do you know what your ex is doing? Do you know who they've become? My ex said: "we're not the same people after this", where I am only to let my imagination run rampant as to what she was trying to instill with such a comment. Second chances should not occur, because the person that leaves usually ends up running off to do something that is totally not what the person that was left wants/requires/hopes for. So, I agree with her, we are not the same people the second time around, and once things are done, they cannot be undone. All trust, committment, LOVE, fidelity is thrown out, and it will not be found again. An example, let us say my ex has slept with someone else in the past 4 months, she decides that in the long run my love fills her more than the fling, she comes back and i sleep with her, how do I know she's thinking of me during those intimate moments? How do I know her image of me is the cause of her orgasm? We won't, and we can't. Honesty no longer exists this day in age, and everyone believes that THEY HAVE NO REASON to tell the other person who they are/what they've done. And this is the heart of why a second chance is a hopeless dream... there is no honesty and without honesty... there cannot be trust. I don't want her back, and for her sake, I hope she never comes back. So much love, so much passion.... gone..... gone......
pixie2004 Posted September 6, 2004 Posted September 6, 2004 Wow... i understand what you are going through. Second chances are allowed i'd say if there were no 3rd parties involved. Otherwise if it is only a difference in personalities / usual rows and fighting (without fisic contact) i'd say everyone deserves a second chance. And yes, peace will come to us!
singleman Posted September 6, 2004 Posted September 6, 2004 Wantan - good post. Well my ex gf is probably already sleeping with someone else (she immediately started seeing him after/during our breakup). But you are right. It will be hard for me to take her back, but I probably still would. Hopefully I'll get past that feeling though. I think that once she is done with this fling(if it ends), she may call me. Hopefully, I'll be strong by then and tell her to hit the road. We'll see. But you are right, what the heck happened to society. No trust, morales, honesty. When you think about it, it kind of sucks. Sometimes i think to myself, "How in the world can she go directly to someone else after a 4 year relationship with me?" I always thought she would stay by my side, but she didn't. She found someone else, and said Good bye like a flick of a switch - with absolutely no remorse.
tokyo Posted September 6, 2004 Posted September 6, 2004 I find reading this depressing.... It´s easy to judge other people´s behavior if you have never been there, but it makes me feel really low to know what kind of people are running out there. I also do think that a lot of people don´t really know anymore how to be honest. I had friends trying to comfort me when I felt because of a guy and at the same time I was wondering: "And you and your girlfriend? You also didn´t behave better....". It´s nice when someone tries to support you, because your his friend, but I do wonder why they can´t do better in their own relationship.
im_tired_loving Posted September 6, 2004 Posted September 6, 2004 its because you were expecting it to have another chance... if you could have just lived without thinking about it, it may come tru. but hoping for it will only give you more troubles. just accept that it happened, live on.. no matter what the other party is doin now, its non of your business anymore... besides, its thier hapiness they after.. not urs...
pixie2004 Posted September 7, 2004 Posted September 7, 2004 its non of your business anymore... Easier said than done - but I totally agree.
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