Djz05 Posted March 5, 2013 Posted March 5, 2013 I've convinced myself she's stringing me along. Recently there's this girl at work that has been catching my attention. This story started over a year ago when she first began her job in our unit. Lets call her Z. She's cute but she really wasn't my type though. I have a reputation at work as being reliable, so during her orientation I would help her out a lot and we got along and became friends. Fast forward a couple of months. My friends know I work with a lot of cute nurses, so they always ask me to invite some of them whenever we hang out. Normally I wouldnt oblige just because of previous events where i had to choose between 2 friends because their relationship ended and I blame myself for introducing them to each other. Ok so back to the original topic. One day I was having small talk with Z. The subject turned to our friends outside work, and mentioned I was going out that evening with friends for some drinks. I did not want to be rude so I offered her an invitation if she wanted to tag along, expecting a no since I did say it was just all guys. Well surprisingly she wanted to go, and so we exchanged numbers and I told her where and when to meet. I ended up arriving 30 mins early right before she came in herself. So we got our orders early and we started to chat until the rest arrived. That night turned out to be fun. By closing time everyone else was going home but she asked me if i wanted to go sing karaoke at her place (one of our earlier topics), so I went with her. After a few more glasses of wine and some songs, she passed out on the sofa and I took that as my cue to leave after getting her a blanket. I never did pay any further thought about that night, and back at work everything was the same. We hung out a few more times, when people at work wanted to go out, but other than that our communication has only been when we see each other during the same shift. Now fast forward to february. Valentines day I woke up to a simple valentines day message from her. I gave her a reply. Now I was quite surprised she did that (sending me a text message ot of the blur), but I chalked it off as her just being nice. A few days later she starts texting me again asking If i was free on her day off and if i wanted to go out with her. I told her I was going to be working that day, but she kept bugging me to skip work (which is new) so I relented and changed my shift. There we were again at the same pub we went the first time around, and we had drinks and talked all night. She did most of the talking, even going into some very personal details, but I myself dodged her questions about some of them. We were there until last call when again she offered me to stay at her place (10 mins away) because she was worried I was too drunk to drive. (Which I wasnt). Being the complete idiot that i am (after hindsight) I declined and said I'll be fine. She was texting me on the way back when I thught I should have taken her offer. Maybe the beer did mess with my decision making because I just realized she might have wanted to hangout some more. I was almost at my place already so I thought I'd surprise her and bring a bottle of wine that I collect. She says shes in bed already so we agreed I'll bring it over next time. Its safe to say that now I do like her. She's smart, speaks her own mind and confident. Since then we have been exchanging messages more often. We banter more at work but here's whats bugging me. Its been more than 2 weeks since we went out. I've asked her a couple of times already if she wanted to go out again but she's been always "busy". Granted one of them she had told me about it a couple of weeks ago, but not a single day free has me wondering. And honestly The past few days I think I might have started coming on too strong because of my"nagging" of when she will be off. Dont get me wrong i have been polite everytime, and she did say she was going to try last weekend but she bailed. Now shes going to NY this weekend while I have my own plans. As it turns out we wont have to see each other for another two weeks. I sent my last msg to her 2 ays ago (i think i shot myself on the foot with that one - i'll miss u) but wont be sending anything else anymore. I just cant understand her. Theres signs that shes probably just stringing me along. Or I dont know...
iKING Posted March 5, 2013 Posted March 5, 2013 I don't get her either (joking) For some reason the turning point seemed to be denying her offer to go back to her place. Maybe she got the impression you weren't interested. Other then that I'm not sure what else dwindled the spark, but that can just happen on its own. You might've come on a bit strong with the I'll miss you text but I'd say wait until you guys both get back and see where it goes. It may or may not be the end of that tale.
JuneJulySeptember Posted March 5, 2013 Posted March 5, 2013 It's hard to say. From your (highly descriptive) narrative, I'd say it could be one of 2 things. 1) She is very friendly and likes your 'company' but has no interest in you. 2) She is an attention whore who is trying to hook you and reject you to feed her ego. Not as malicious as it seems, but some women will kind of try to 'hook' men they have no interest in because, well they can. I have had both happen to me. If I had to put my money on it, I'd say it was #1. I also have had women offer their place to me to crash when I have had a few drinks and it means nothing. It could really be interpreted to mean she sees you as completely harmless. Not in a good way. There's still a small outside shot that she might have lukewarm interest. If you are game, I'd give it one more shot and then call it a loss.
Author Djz05 Posted March 6, 2013 Author Posted March 6, 2013 I guess I just wish she were more honest with me. I can deal with rejection, but this uncertainty bothers me more. I'm the kind of guy that when I start really liking someone, everyone else just ends up on the sidelines. I really cant think of going out with someone else unless I get some reasonable amount of closure. Otherwise I just end up feeling bitter. So right now I'm sure recent events will just keep playing in my head with my usual overthinking things (i must have done something wrong, shes probably a player, etc etc) bugging me. Thankfully I think I nipped this one on its bud early enough to let it drastically affect me. The balls in her court now, I guess I'll just keep it down until she gets back to me if ever.
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