PogoStick Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 She's 31, attractive everyday kind of girl. If I was lusting I would have gone for her already. The intellectual connection is great and she's fun to hang out with. I've been taking her out for about 6 weeks, usually once a week. She's been waiting for me to kiss her this whole time but I've progressed things slowly. The last week I finally cuddled her while we watched a movie but still didn't pull the trigger. The thing is, she's very religious and I'm atheist! It's funny because she leads youth groups and tells her kids to "run away" from sex. Her childhood was sheltered and conservative. I'm highly sexual, experienced and like it wild. While she's clearly waiting to be kissed I'm not sure if she's interested in sex. I haven't been with a girl who's this sexually passive since my college years. She gives out zero flirting and sexual tension, 100% waiting for me to move things forward. I'm curious if she has a wild side that needs to be unearthed. On the other hand, maybe she's just not a sexual person which is a deal breaker for me. Should I move it along and see what happens, or should I take my lack of lust as a sign it's just not there?
iKING Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 You could try to make a move, but the odds really aren't in your favor. Either A. It blows up in your face and you lose her. B. It will unearth what she's missed, and then probably blow up in your face. Or C. She refuses and says she's waiting until marriage. It could work out to where you're just the guy she's been waiting for and it all goes well, but the odds don't sound to be in your favor. I almost forgot to ask, is she a virgin? And did she acquire the religious overtones or were they from her upbringing?
crude Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Since you've mentioned that a non-sexual person is a deal breaker, you don't have anything to lose. If she's an iceberg that can't be melted, just move on.
Author PogoStick Posted March 4, 2013 Author Posted March 4, 2013 I'm guessing her parents are religious since I know she was sheltered, like they were strict about her music and TV. She got her BS in some sort of religious studies. Now, she's actually fairly liberal for being that religious, supporting gay rights and sex education in schools. That makes her interesting and politically acceptable for me. She said she's not a virgin but I'm guessing she's still into a more traditional relationship. This feels more 19 y/o, whereas every women I've met in the last several years the sexuality was obvious within a week. Ironically, my first f-buddy was a catholic girl with strict parents. At least I don't have to sneak in through the window these days.
Keenly Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Here's what you do... Take her out on a date Make sure it's a bit late and if she has enough friends.... In all seriousness if your feeling it, go with it. If you have doubts, it may not be a good idea.
iKING Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 I'm guessing her parents are religious since I know she was sheltered, like they were strict about her music and TV. She got her BS in some sort of religious studies. Now, she's actually fairly liberal for being that religious, supporting gay rights and sex education in schools. That makes her interesting and politically acceptable for me. She said she's not a virgin but I'm guessing she's still into a more traditional relationship. This feels more 19 y/o, whereas every women I've met in the last several years the sexuality was obvious within a week. Ironically, my first f-buddy was a catholic girl with strict parents. At least I get to enter through the door these days. My guess is she isn't going to give it up very easily but you could give it a shot. Odds are more-so in your favor since she isn't a virgin and isn't 100% by the books into her religious dogmas. Ironically, my second was pretty much the same as your first, but she was ready for it I suppose, she also wasn't all that into her religion.
kaylan Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 She's 31, attractive everyday kind of girl. If I was lusting I would have gone for her already. The intellectual connection is great and she's fun to hang out with. I've been taking her out for about 6 weeks, usually once a week. She's been waiting for me to kiss her this whole time but I've progressed things slowly. The last week I finally cuddled her while we watched a movie but still didn't pull the trigger. The thing is, she's very religious and I'm atheist! It's funny because she leads youth groups and tells her kids to "run away" from sex. Her childhood was sheltered and conservative. I'm highly sexual, experienced and like it wild. While she's clearly waiting to be kissed I'm not sure if she's interested in sex. I haven't been with a girl who's this sexually passive since my college years. She gives out zero flirting and sexual tension, 100% waiting for me to move things forward. I'm curious if she has a wild side that needs to be unearthed. On the other hand, maybe she's just not a sexual person which is a deal breaker for me. Should I move it along and see what happens, or should I take my lack of lust as a sign it's just not there? Theres a good chance you guys wont be sexually compatible. And theres a good chance she wont be ready for sex for a while. I say kiss her, and then have an open conversation about sex.
Author PogoStick Posted March 5, 2013 Author Posted March 5, 2013 It annoys me when men are too shy to make a move and then complain to me about how Im not sexual...these are guys that are just not confident. I show signs of interest though so thats where I differ Thanks for giving a girl's perspective. Well now I feel like she's a challenge I'm supposed to conquer. I know she's open because she never pulls away from contact and lingers with me at the end of the date. What's different is she doesn't flirt or drop innuendo, just totally passive. Her demeanor has me friend-zoning myself. That's pretty weird when you think of the typical threads on LS. Needing to make the first move is fine, but she then holds the responsibility of piquing my desire. My balls should tingle with animalistic intentions.
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