laila1711 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 I dated someone in a LD for over 1 year.Its been since last feb when i saw him. I made him my everything in my head. I know he is a troubled man and only yesterday came to terms with the fact he does not want to give me what i want. We mailed this morning and it was quite nasty on my part i told him all the things i had on my mind,like you only sent me flowers after i gave you a gift and even then white flowers which i hate.Many other things i said.After this i blocked him. I feel so empty and so bad about myself for inflicting such nastiness on someone who is broken. I have so much anger in me towards him. Im not happy.
Toddbt12y1 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 I dated someone in a LD for over 1 year.Its been since last feb when i saw him. I made him my everything in my head. I know he is a troubled man and only yesterday came to terms with the fact he does not want to give me what i want. We mailed this morning and it was quite nasty on my part i told him all the things i had on my mind,like you only sent me flowers after i gave you a gift and even then white flowers which i hate.Many other things i said.After this i blocked him. I feel so empty and so bad about myself for inflicting such nastiness on someone who is broken. I have so much anger in me towards him. Im not happy. Then consider this a good thing. There is no reason for you to mis-treat him. Just as there is no reason, for you to remain unhappy in a relationship.
cdt76 Posted March 5, 2013 Posted March 5, 2013 Get it out. Unleash it on him. There is no rule that sys we have to take stupid crap from people! Let him have it!!! Get it all out. If I could of done that 4 years ago, I'd be a much better man today. Don't keep it in. It just festers.
coffeebean201 Posted March 5, 2013 Posted March 5, 2013 so he is troubled and it is LDR. Other than that - does he try to make you happy the best way he can? or is he just careless and reckless about you? Some guys are careless/reckless and other guys are just clueless. which one is he?
Author laila1711 Posted March 5, 2013 Author Posted March 5, 2013 Cdt Thank you for your words,i felt to horrid at myself for saying such nasty things to a broken human but i couldnt take it anymore.I get he did not want a relationship but why not do the decent thing and back away.I told him i met someone i like and i cant wait forever,he knows he has me. I said nasty things and he was nice.Do you not think it gives him the power by me being so brutal with honesty off course? Coffeebean Careless and reckless for sure.When things were fine i was quite submissive and he started being really mean,i remember 1 phone call i said why have you not called me in 2 weeks,because i did not want to talk to you,then i asked where he had been?Who are you to ask...I was cool on the phone but i was crying inside.I dont understand what he wants.
Author laila1711 Posted March 5, 2013 Author Posted March 5, 2013 Cdt Thank you for your words,i felt to horrid at myself for saying such nasty things to a broken human but i couldnt take it anymore.I get he did not want a relationship but why not do the decent thing and back away.I told him i met someone i like and i cant wait forever,he knows he has me. I said nasty things and he was nice.Do you not think it gives him the power by me being so brutal with honesty off course? Coffeebean Careless and reckless and clumsy .When things were fine i was quite submissive and he started being really mean,i remember 1 phone call i said why have you not called me in 2 weeks,because i did not want to talk to you,then i asked where he had been?Who are you to ask...I was cool on the phone but i was crying inside.I dont understand what he wants. He does not celebrate xmas birthdays nothing.He was concieved through a one night stand and raised in a orphanage,he cannot show emotion is shy and he is German. He sent me flowers on my birthday then just vanished,nobody got him anything for his birthday,that was truly sad for me. I know its not sex as we dont see each other often and he could not CLMX.
cdt76 Posted March 5, 2013 Posted March 5, 2013 See, I don't subscribe to the school of thought that says we always have to turn the other cheek. That we have to take the high road when people hurt us. We can lash out all we want. Does it make us look silly or crazy? I don't know. I do know the person you unlease it on, deserves it. Deserves more but we are satisfied to vent verbally. That person will know where, when, how and why they crossed the line and what you think of them. They will go on their way and they will think what they think, but in the end, there is no denying everything you felt and everything you said was the truth, was from the heart and you meant every word. Now, the second part of that is, will it make you feel better? In the short term yes. You will have that satisfaction that you got it out, you said what you needed to say. However, that persons response will neither be what you want to hear nor what you need to feel. You will still be angry. You will still be hurt. It will still take time for you to get past this. I wish I could just go OFF on my two ex's. But I can't. My job/career prohibit it should I go too far, which with my anger, I probably would. Just know, you will be angry for awhile, no matter what words you say to tell him.
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