jags2bowl27 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Hey guys, So its been 6 months since the breakup, 2 months now (sent a note on Jan 1st to her that she is selfish and i need to move on). Talked to another girl in between then but shut it down after seeing that she wasnt anything special.... I have made a commitment to go out, have fun, meet new people, but not get into any serious type of relationship for some months now. Im not ready. But here is my problem..... My ego is still shattered that the girl i loved so much and still think about on a daily basis is still with the guy she left me for. Its been 6 months, I dont want to have a big ego but it still haunts me. Im competitive, I have said that time and time again but honestly, I dont want to be here... I want to be able to let go. She is young, i want to use that as the excuse of why she did it but i still can not get past the fact that she left me, and is still with this guy for 6 months... she even has introduced him to the family. Please help me with this, give me a frame of mind to stick with. I have been working out, I have been hanging with friends... i know it takes time but I dont think I see it in the right light. I dont know if she contacts me if I should be nice and just say thankful and not expect anything. Ignoring her i believe isnt the answer either as it isnt good to hold grudges. She hasnt contacted me in 2 months and either have I, but my birthday is coming up and i cant lie, it has me thinking. Any advice would be great. I really just want to move along and be happy, and it hurts to see that she has already obviously passed this stage.
Author jags2bowl27 Posted March 4, 2013 Author Posted March 4, 2013 bump would love some opinions on this guys and gals
jagdude14 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 bump would love some opinions on this guys and gals My suggestion is if you are in jax we are both in the same boat
Author jags2bowl27 Posted March 4, 2013 Author Posted March 4, 2013 My suggestion is if you are in jax we are both in the same boat maybe it is because we are jag fans lol. but seriously i would love someone to get my mind straight so i can move on
jagdude14 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 The hope the ego the thought just have to die. You have to kill it or they will eventually die. Only you can decide when. As hard as that sounds. I am I. A similar situation. My ex dumped me and haven't heard from her. I loved her and treated her the best. Take it to the next level. No fbook with her twitter or anything. Go dark on anything you know about her. Like why do you know about her bf meeting the fam? Stuff like that only hurts you. This is what defines who you are and for the most part we are all here because we are struggling with it. My first GF took over a yr to get over. I am currently day 46? Nc with my more recent ex. I treated her the best. Idk what happened. I miss her but I need to and will respect myself and her wishes. That defines man. I mean lets say this she comes back to you after being with this dude. How great of a relationship would you honestly have with her? You wouldn't trust her and you'd look over your shoulder. Keep on keepin on like joe dirt lol. Life's a garden dig it. In other words you have to look out for number 1 right now you!!! You know why because she is not acting with the best intentions for you at the moment so shift your ego to yourself not how she treated you. With that said I can preach but I know how hard it is to apply. 1
cavalier99 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Dont have much time to type now. But seems like you aren't making enough effort to just accept that the battle is over and lost. It is done onto the next. Your still fighting the last war and are the only one left in the fox hole. You need to forgive yourself. You did your best but it wasn't enough for her or timing was off ecetera. Pick a reason. Also don't leave open that option for communication. Block her and if she get an email thru don't respond. Cav 3
Logan oO Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Hey guys, So its been 6 months since the breakup, 2 months now (sent a note on Jan 1st to her that she is selfish and i need to move on). Talked to another girl in between then but shut it down after seeing that she wasnt anything special.... I have made a commitment to go out, have fun, meet new people, but not get into any serious type of relationship for some months now. Im not ready. But here is my problem..... My ego is still shattered that the girl i loved so much and still think about on a daily basis is still with the guy she left me for. Its been 6 months, I dont want to have a big ego but it still haunts me. Im competitive, I have said that time and time again but honestly, I dont want to be here... I want to be able to let go. She is young, i want to use that as the excuse of why she did it but i still can not get past the fact that she left me, and is still with this guy for 6 months... she even has introduced him to the family. Please help me with this, give me a frame of mind to stick with. I have been working out, I have been hanging with friends... i know it takes time but I dont think I see it in the right light. I dont know if she contacts me if I should be nice and just say thankful and not expect anything. Ignoring her i believe isnt the answer either as it isnt good to hold grudges. She hasnt contacted me in 2 months and either have I, but my birthday is coming up and i cant lie, it has me thinking. Any advice would be great. I really just want to move along and be happy, and it hurts to see that she has already obviously passed this stage. I feel your pain, my relationship ended just about a month ago, after two and a bit years of being together, we lived together, she suffered with depression and broke up with me several times. With regards to your own, and mine being so fresh. What is getting me through is telling myself 'i will make it through today' it's a simple goal, but occupying your mind only takes you so far. You have to stop doing things at some point. The very hardest thing about being dumped is actually 'accepting' you are powerless to do anything to change the decision, believe me i have tried the calling, texting etc but it's all the same result, still doesn't want to know...so now, i've just accepted that i can't do anything to change how things are, and i'm trying to start rebuilding my life again. So chin up buddy - it does get better, I've been through it before and you will wake up one day in the future and it;'s not that you realize you are over her, it's that you realize, 'i'm happy again' least thats how i remember it. Anyways man, i hope things work out for you. I signed up to reply to your post. 3
Coping Vortex Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 I feel your pain, my relationship ended just about a month ago, after two and a bit years of being together, we lived together, she suffered with depression and broke up with me several times. With regards to your own, and mine being so fresh. What is getting me through is telling myself 'i will make it through today' it's a simple goal, but occupying your mind only takes you so far. You have to stop doing things at some point. The very hardest thing about being dumped is actually 'accepting' you are powerless to do anything to change the decision, believe me i have tried the calling, texting etc but it's all the same result, still doesn't want to know...so now, i've just accepted that i can't do anything to change how things are, and i'm trying to start rebuilding my life again. So chin up buddy - it does get better, I've been through it before and you will wake up one day in the future and it;'s not that you realize you are over her, it's that you realize, 'i'm happy again' least thats how i remember it. Anyways man, i hope things work out for you. I signed up to reply to your post. Wow! Exactly how I feel. I haven't gotten to the rebuilding the life part though. 1
Author jags2bowl27 Posted March 4, 2013 Author Posted March 4, 2013 Wow! Exactly how I feel. I haven't gotten to the rebuilding the life part though. the crappiest part is im 6 months, your only 2 haha. But i see where you are going and i did feel that way but the roller coaster obviously hit me, and i do know that right now even if she did say i want to come back she wouldnt be ready. it kills me to know that she is okay with the decision and obviously i am assuming. Maybe she is bottling up her emotions, she already tried to come back once when she saw me with the 1st new chick. I know it will take growth from her end but she honestly thinks what she did is OKAY and that isnt the girl i knew. it hurts but my chin is up, it just drops when im home alone and I know i can get someone else but it isnt the right thing to do. I feel so bad dragging these two girls into my mess
Recommended Posts