Kajammer Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 First greetings to all. This is my first post, but I feel like I need some reassurance since I have never encountered this before. So lets see. I have been officially dating my boyfriend since mid February of 2012. We became friends in November 2011 and through that time just kind of flirted, then texted, then physically went on some dates. Everything is pretty much great except he has had a difficult past due to medical issues. He is also 11 years my senior which doesn't bother me. Due to that he has had a lot more sexual and life experiences. Again doesn't bother me..... But here is the thing that does bother me. He had/has a friend from college who he had a history with. She is now a stripper and during college they partied, smoked, and had sex. She also had sex with every guy in that circle. But hey it is college right? Anyway his parents despise her because she stole money and took advantage of my boyfriend. I am practically a saint, godsend as his parents say. Anyway he wrote a song about her and 9 years later still sings it and the content pretty much contains them having sex. I get upset and tell him to play it in his own time and privacy. After having multiple fights he for the most part complied. A couple days ago he went back to it and made me listen to the new version. Whenever I get upset and tell him I don't want to listen to it he retorts with either "Get over yourself" "I don't understand why you are upset" or "look at it as if you don't know me or the characters" It pisses me off to no end and I have communicated how it hurts me, but he pretty much sticks with his retorts. So what to do? I understand it is probably my insecurities and jealousy playing around, but do I have a right to be mad? More than anything I am looking for someone to say "you have a right to feel that way" here is how to communicate with him. To be honest I would love it if she was out of his life completely. Thanks for reading, it has been bothering me for over 6 months now
Toddbt12y1 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Lol wow you let your bf screw a random whore and excuse it as "it's colllege"that's bad.. 1
man_in_the_box Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Lol wow you let your bf screw a random whore and excuse it as "it's colllege"that's bad.. Did you miss the part where it was 10 YEARS AGO and they're dating since 2012? If you're going to be harsh at least be right. 3
Author Kajammer Posted March 4, 2013 Author Posted March 4, 2013 Did you miss the part where it was 10 YEARS AGO and they're dating since 2012? If you're going to be harsh at least be right. I will edit my post. Thank you for pointing that out to the user.
Ninjainpajamas Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Ahh nothing like being in love with a stripper who gave you the hottest sex of your life and dating someone 11 years younger than you yet still managing to be more immature and idiotic than they are...I can totally see why women love older men like this! I wrote a song about it...wanna hear it? ::hit it boys!:: Oh Candy, your real name is Sandy You made me feel dandy, when we had sex in the back of the van-di Oh Candy, my life without you is mainly my right handy you kissed your hot friend Mandy oh how you hypnotized meeee Oh Candy, even though I can't have thy....I'll still fantasize about ye I feel the thunder inside riisiiiing ::beat picks up:: You stole my money like you stole my heart You told me and my friends we'd never be apart ohhh cannnndy! Your fake boobies dont jiggle Your vaginas loose But I'm still hanging my head like a long neck goose..ohhh caaaandeeeeee You hate my parents and they hate you too but I don't care this songs dedicated to you...ohh my god candeeeeee! ::slow part:: Please Candy, if you ever could understand me You'd realize my heart doesn't belong to me I now date younger girls that remind me Of that young college stripper that I love named....Caaandyyyyyyy ::fade out cymbals:: 6
man_in_the_box Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Other than that I think its completely tactless to sing a song about banging your stripper ex in the presence of your girlfriend. Especially if its something he wrote about something that actually happened. I'm sometimes amazed how knuckle-headed men can be in how you should and should not interact with your girlfriend. I mean, isn't this just common sense not to sing song about shagging your ex to your new partner and asking her for input? 6
CudLRoo Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Yeah, it's odd, it's insensitive, plus I get irked by 'guitar dudes' who keep playing the same old songs for YEARS, and feign being pro musicians around everyone. I don't wanna hear your 'music', son, I have enough choonz in my vast collection to pick from.
iKING Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Ahh nothing like being in love with a stripper who gave you the hottest sex of your life and dating someone 11 years younger than you yet still managing to be more immature and idiotic than they are...I can totally see why women love older men like this! I wrote a song about it...wanna hear it? ::hit it boys!:: Oh Candy, your real name is Sandy You made me feel dandy, when we had sex in the back of the van-di Oh Candy, my life without you is mainly my right handy you kissed your hot friend Mandy oh how you hypnotized meeee Oh Candy, even though I can't have thy....I'll still fantasize about ye I feel the thunder inside riisiiiing ::beat picks up:: You stole my money like you stole my heart You told me and my friends we'd never be apart ohhh cannnndy! Your fake boobies dont jiggle Your vaginas loose But I'm still hanging my head like a long neck goose..ohhh caaaandeeeeee You hate my parents and they hate you too but I don't care this songs dedicated to you...ohh my god candeeeeee! ::slow part:: Please Candy, if you ever could understand me You'd realize my heart doesn't belong to me I now date younger girls that remind me Of that young college stripper that I love named....Caaandyyyyyyy ::fade out cymbals:: That was incredibly insensitive to the situation and also pretty hilarious. Bravo!
Author Kajammer Posted March 4, 2013 Author Posted March 4, 2013 Ahh nothing like being in love with a stripper who gave you the hottest sex of your life and dating someone 11 years younger than you yet still managing to be more immature and idiotic than they are...I can totally see why women love older men like this! I wrote a song about it...wanna hear it? ::hit it boys!:: Oh Candy, your real name is Sandy You made me feel dandy, when we had sex in the back of the van-di Oh Candy, my life without you is mainly my right handy you kissed your hot friend Mandy oh how you hypnotized meeee Oh Candy, even though I can't have thy....I'll still fantasize about ye I feel the thunder inside riisiiiing ::beat picks up:: You stole my money like you stole my heart You told me and my friends we'd never be apart ohhh cannnndy! Your fake boobies dont jiggle Your vaginas loose But I'm still hanging my head like a long neck goose..ohhh caaaandeeeeee You hate my parents and they hate you too but I don't care this songs dedicated to you...ohh my god candeeeeee! ::slow part:: Please Candy, if you ever could understand me You'd realize my heart doesn't belong to me I now date younger girls that remind me Of that young college stripper that I love named....Caaandyyyyyyy ::fade out cymbals:: Honestly...... Lmao!!! Probably my favorite song now 1
Minneloa Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 The part about him playing you the new version is egregious. Insult to injury. 2
iKING Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Honestly...... Lmao!!! Probably my favorite song now At least it was well received If this guy wants to be with a girl with no self respect so badly, let him. There has to be residual feelings/hurt, or he's not terribly creative and should try a new profession. Shouldn't you be the one he's making songs about? 1
tk-421 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 When is he playing this song? I can understand why you don't like, but without having heard the song, it's hard for me to be objective about it. As a singer/songrwriter, one of my biggest fears is upsetting people I know with songs because it's easier to write what you know and draw from your own experiences. Is he playing this song at a show or open mic or does he just play it at home around you? I actually wrote a song not long ago addressing the topic of how future girlfriends might feel about past songs written for someone else. Songs can exorcise a demon, convey a message, whatever. I'm not sure what his intent is, but think of all the songs that have been written about intimate encounters by well known performers. How do you think their subsequent significant others feel about it? Hopefully they realize it's just a song.
CudLRoo Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Yeah, what a knobster this guy is. Sorry if I'm offending anyone here, but anytime I hear a dude wailing on an acoustic guitar, I always wish I had a Gatling gun hanging from my shoulder. It's like there's this rule that you're SUPPOSED to like that type of guff. I don't, never have, and it irritates me when people step up and think they're musical gods (btw, I do know how to play a guitar). It's actually an invasion of my mental space, and what's worse is we now have these South American acoustic buskers here that don't speak English, so can't nuance/understand the words!!! I'll say this. Any time I watch standup on TV and a comedian walks onstage with a guitar. There are gonna be bad songs. I change the channel. Apols, rant over!!!
Author Kajammer Posted March 4, 2013 Author Posted March 4, 2013 When is he playing this song? I can understand why you don't like, but without having heard the song, it's hard for me to be objective about it. As a singer/songrwriter, one of my biggest fears is upsetting people I know with songs because it's easier to write what you know and draw from your own experiences. Is he playing this song at a show or open mic or does he just play it at home around you? I actually wrote a song not long ago addressing the topic of how future girlfriends might feel about past songs written for someone else. Songs can exorcise a demon, convey a message, whatever. I'm not sure what his intent is, but think of all the songs that have been written about intimate encounters by well known performers. How do you think their subsequent significant others feel about it? Hopefully they realize it's just a song. @iKing - he did write a song about me after I put up a stink about his song. @tk - he only plays at home and records it. I don't want it to sound like he plays only that song, he has a lot of different ones. I can give you a few lines that bother me. "Watching the tears running Down my babies deep blue eyes" "Priceless how you wear your priceless gown tonight, or should i say wore, Off with the dress you wore it's on my floor" "Marry me, marry me, marry me, Mary Magdalene" .... Yeah
Toddbt12y1 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Did you miss the part where it was 10 YEARS AGO and they're dating since 2012? If you're going to be harsh at least be right. Wasn't being harsh. Just pointing out something I saw. Indeed I did miss that. Sorry we all make mistakes well I see you don't...God in a box
CudLRoo Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 "Watching the tears running Down my babies deep blue eyes" "Priceless how you wear your priceless gown tonight, or should i say wore, Off with the dress you wore it's on my floor" "Marry me, marry me, marry me, Mary Magdalene" Send in the snipers, let's make this world a better place, one by one if necessary!!!
iKING Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 @iKing - he did write a song about me after I put up a stink about his song. @tk - he only plays at home and records it. I don't want it to sound like he plays only that song, he has a lot of different ones. I can give you a few lines that bother me. "Watching the tears running Down my babies deep blue eyes" "Priceless how you wear your priceless gown tonight, or should i say wore, Off with the dress you wore it's on my floor" "Marry me, marry me, marry me, Mary Magdalene" .... Yeah Was it sweet? Granted he is a writer, so his work is bound to be personal, but that one is a good one to omit when you have a new love. Especially considering his new love sounds to be far better then the one he's singing about. The Mary Magdalene part is pretty sweet I must admit. That's like, the ultimate name drop. Her and Jesus were inseparable.
iKING Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Wasn't being harsh. Just pointing out something I saw. Indeed I did miss that. Sorry we all make mistakes well I see you don't...God in a box Speaking of mistakes, in your signature, It's were not where.
Toddbt12y1 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Speaking of mistakes, in your signature, It's were not where. I'm glad to see you guys ca be a total dick. Isn't that nice. You must think you're something. My bad guys...for making a mistake. Can't wait for you to make one. I am sure you won't.
Author Kajammer Posted March 4, 2013 Author Posted March 4, 2013 Was it sweet? Granted he is a writer, so his work is bound to be personal, but that one is a good one to omit when you have a new love. Especially considering his new love sounds to be far better then the one he's singing about. The Mary Magdalene part is pretty sweet I must admit. That's like, the ultimate name drop. Her and Jesus were inseparable. Was what sweet? The song? I am not that bitter to say it isn't a good song. Just irks me
CudLRoo Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 I don't understand how that bit is 'sweet'. I don't think JC was boning MM, so it doesn't really work. It just probably sounds cool to people who like that type of thing, I'm not saying any more. Give me Immortal Technique any day, he has real things to say. PS: And the spelling pedantry sucks.
iKING Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 I'm glad to see you guys ca be a total dick. Isn't that nice. You must think you're something. My bad guys...for making a mistake. Can't wait for you to make one. I am sure you won't. Lighten up I was just messing with you. Everyone makes mistakes, other people correct us, and we move on. 1
iKING Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 I don't understand how that bit is 'sweet'. I don't think JC was boning MM, so it doesn't really work. It just probably sounds cool to people who like that type of thing, I'm not saying any more. Give me Immortal Technique any day, he has real things to say. PS: And the spelling pedantry sucks. It's possible but I doubt it as well, the two were just inseparable. She was there in his final hours by Mary's side (his mother), she was devastated by his death and went to his burial tomb to mourn and anoint his feet (at which time she discovered his body was missing). Despite the fact that she literally followed him absolutely everywhere, she loved him, that much shows. Which song, the one where he helps his friend rape his own mother or the one where he falls for the girl that has HIV? I'll agree with you on the latter, but the former, not so much.
Toddbt12y1 Posted March 4, 2013 Posted March 4, 2013 Lighten up I was just messing with you. Everyone makes mistakes, other people correct us, and we move on. Yes...you are right. Ty.
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