We broke up, and I can't afford to move out.

[lavenderlove]

I moved to a foreign country to be with my (x) loved one, and have just recently found a part time job. I live in his place I have no family here, just one really nice friend and zero savings.

 

The reason why we separated in a nutshell is because after 8 years I wanted to get married, and he didn't. He moved to this place where we are now a year ago and has set up a successful business, while I went back to my home country to set up mine.(Once I have done the startup, I can manage it from anywhere) The deal always was, that either of our businesses fail, the other one will help out. Well it turned out I was in more need of his help.

So to cut this story short, I am broke. And I am stuck in his house, and it looks like I will have to be living here for an other 4 weeks at least.

 

Because we lived in absolute hell for a while now, the breakup didn't change much of that, it is just a different kind of hell.

 

But here is my dilemma. He actually offered me a large sum of money, which I refused first hand. But now I am tracking back on my thought.

 

He genuinely wants to help me, also possibly to ease his guilt, so there is no bitterness there.

 

BUT, If I take his money, I get to go, move town, and start my life afresh.

In the same time, I will be living off HIS cash, which will make me feel like I can't fend for myself without his help, and for me this might be more of a letdown.

 

If I refuse his money, I will at least have the pleasure of living my own life I carve out for myself, and I know, that in a month or two I would be out of his house, possibly in less then a year out of this country town too.

I would probably learn and grow as a person more this way.

But I am terrified, and often have anxiety and I panic about this money issue.

I am also worried, that I won't be able to support my business (which I love doing so much it kind of keeps me sane at the moment) and that it will never make it to the stage of supporting me, so that eventually I can move back home.

 

Please help me with some suggestions, I really need some advice.

[Els]

I don't see anything wrong with accepting financial help to move back home if the only reason you moved there to begin with was to be with him. That is a sacrifice worth more than money can buy, for some people. IMO this is the least he could do.