lostindreams Posted March 3, 2013 Posted March 3, 2013 I am only 3 days NC with my ex... the thing is after he left me for another woman (because i asked him when we would get married, had been together 7 years) he still texted me often and said he still loved me and regretted leaving me. He follows my youtube and flickr and whatnot and everytime i post something he will message or text or comment saying im so pretty and why did he leave me and what not. Anyway I have been strong , i was eating his breadcrumbs for weeks and 3 days ago abruptly stopped- thanks to you guys on this forum the question is--- at what point does the NC start to feel like your ok, like you can get over him, things will be ok And during NC, waht happens if he calls or contacts me? Should i ignore, or keep replies short and sweet, or what? thanks 1
unknown249 Posted March 3, 2013 Posted March 3, 2013 I am currently on day 24. Things got so much easier for me after the week stage, because I felt good with myself that I could hold out that long. Because I lasted 7 days I vowed to not go back. I kept very busy, went out with friends a lot and immersed myself with work. Although I do still have thoughts about him, especially recently for some reason, NC has helped me see the light a lot more. After the break up I was putting him on a pedestal which he completely did not deserve (I got cheated on too after 3.5 years) - NC has made me see his faults and made me realise I do not need someone who will treat me that badly in my life. Stick at it, it does get easier I promise. You'll look back to how you're feeling now, and you'll be so proud of yourself.
unknown249 Posted March 3, 2013 Posted March 3, 2013 Also I would recommend to ignore his calls and texts in the future. If he does not respect your wish to have time apart to get over him, he is a jerk. You need to think of yourself from now on, not satisfying his guilty needs and selfish ways.
Sexy Teddy Bear Posted March 3, 2013 Posted March 3, 2013 When I went no contact, I locked my self in my room for 2 whole weeks with barely any food or sleep. At some point in week 3, I started coming out of my room and talking a little bit again. I started eating more, sleeping better. A few days ago was the first time I left my house since the BU. It depends on each person how long it will take you to start to feel better. I, for example, have always gotten over loss very quickly. This type of loss was a first for me, but I feel I'm doing okay-ish now. Especially after I learned - a few days ago - that she left me for some other dude, and maybe even cheated on me. After I learned that nasty and disgusting truth about her, I felt like I could begin to heal. I lost all respect for her and my love for her was easily halved. Being social will help a lot. Hang out with your friends again. Make jokes directed toward your younger sister and prank her constantly until she is so utterly annoyed by the sight of you she just wants to punch you out (hehe, one of my favorite past times! ). Just try to enjoy yourself. You will know when your ready to move on and find a new relationship. I'm not at that point yet, but I'm sure it will be quite obvious. And if he calls, ignore him. Honestly, if my ex tried to directly contact me, I'm not sure if I would be strong enough to ignore her. I guess it might depend on the context of her text/mail/etc. If I did reply, however, it certainly wouldn't be until after I had put a significant amount of thought into it. But the general advice is to always ignore any contact from them.
iouaname Posted March 3, 2013 Posted March 3, 2013 I'll let you know when I get there But honestly - I felt better the first two weeks I went no contact, and now I'm going into the third week and I'm starting to struggle a bit. Still, I feel better than I did before I went no contact so I mean - that's progress.
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