chrisftw Posted March 3, 2013 Posted March 3, 2013 and she's pretty direct about it to. long story short. talked up this girl for a little while. things are super casual but i tested her in some areas just to see her reaction about things. And now she doesn't trust me more than likely because i played a game with her and she checked me on it. Its funny though because she still wants to hang out. but now she seems to stay at arms length emotionally. any recovery in this? so far i just sorta laugh at the situation and say lets move past that in work on the trust rebuilding. and she sorta smirks at that prospect and just says 'mm hmm' i'm thinking attractive females don't like to be tested and when somebody does test them they get their panties in a bunch. Truth?
Author chrisftw Posted March 3, 2013 Author Posted March 3, 2013 I think you call lying testing. hehe.. touche.. so it was a lie i told. but a lie told to see how clever she is to catch on to it and how fast. took her a week to figure it out. i sorta tipped my hat to her. it had nothing to do with people or anything. actually it had to do with money. but now she seems combative in a playful way constantly checking me on things and refuses to 'trust' me for right now. but will still 'show up' to where i am especially if i say i'll be there without any direct invite. which is also me playing games. lol just sucks because now she doesn't really call me on the phone anymore. i always liked our 5 minute quick conversations. or when she'd call me in the morning those were sweet. and she doesn't reply back to most text. still in person her actions speak louder than any game she may be playing. in fact we were hanging out the other day. it was getting late. she had to be somewhere i said just drop me off then we'll chill another time. and she countered me and said well i'm still doing so and so. and i was like well then i guess i'll stick around. if only the cat and mouse game didn't have to happen EVERY TIME i get interested in someone. for whatever reason i carry this persona of some guy that just gets all this Vagina. its kinda ridiculous. if i tell a girl i don't have a girlfriend they think i'm straight up lying. she did say something that kinda turned me off. she said any game you play i can play it better because i know how to play the game. I think the only recovery is just to sit back and let her come to 'another conclusion' about me.
outsidethebox Posted March 3, 2013 Posted March 3, 2013 Call it what you want, but you lied to her to see if she could figure out if it was a lie and she did. So she passed your stupid test. Now you're being tested on whether you're worth keeping around. In your post comments you have the attitude of a player where truth is an inconvenience. She told you she can't trust you, and how can someone trust you when you "test" them for no earthly reason. Who are you to test someone? So grow up and drop the player attitude and she may grow to respect you. My opinion. 4
Author chrisftw Posted March 3, 2013 Author Posted March 3, 2013 (edited) Call it what you want, but you lied to her to see if she could figure out if it was a lie and she did. So she passed your stupid test. Now you're being tested on whether you're worth keeping around. In your post comments you have the attitude of a player where truth is an inconvenience. She told you she can't trust you, and how can someone trust you when you "test" them for no earthly reason. Who are you to test someone? So grow up and drop the player attitude and she may grow to respect you. My opinion. your post does have some merit to it. i think it really is my low key personality and indifferent attitude to just about everything that makes people believe that i have swarms of women buzzing around me. going out. strangers gravitiate towards me easily i find i have a radiant personality. as a male if had the pleasure of other men/women buy me drinks based on interactions i had with females/males. (dancing, flirting, laughing etc..) people like to talk to me its obvious especially at school. but i think that's just more of people like people who like to have fun. our lecture hall got split into groups she went with another group i was in this group with this fiery hot red head. and a couple of friends. I had a great time laughs and i tried to hit on the red head which she smiles ear to ear and said.. well my GIRLFRIEND so and so. and i knew to stop that 'type' of banter and move to a more innocent flirty one. the whole time i occasionally glance over at the real target the girl who doesn't 'trust' me and 'knows the game' and she's sitting in the corner by herself totally apart from her group glancing at me every now and then. obviously she sees me in my element. and i wanted her to. just another 'test' if you will. but the more of that element she sees the more she plays hardball. but i won't become some door mat to get a woman. that's just dumb. i think this woman just wants some guy she can control. she said it herself she likes to be the dominate person in the relationship. the 'guy' if you will. counterpoint its funny because i asked her what place around the city are good places to go. she told me of a new night club and that it would be perfect for me and that i would really like it. i went there and as much as i hate to admit it i was at the start a fish outta water. lots of beautiful people (male/females) and a very high class multi level bar/club. i'm thinking this is this girls image of me. some playboy all star that goes to the finest clubs. I need to devalue myself or something lol Edited March 3, 2013 by chrisftw
Radu Posted March 3, 2013 Posted March 3, 2013 Don't worry, i don't think you will be tied down for far longer.
Author chrisftw Posted March 4, 2013 Author Posted March 4, 2013 Don't worry, i don't think you will be tied down for far longer. i don't either. still though i've moved off from her until she gets her actions in line with what she's saying or NOT saying. and doing or not doing. fine you don't trust me.. lets move past that and get on with things (which i actually said) otherwise lament over it and think i have poor character and ignore me. (which i didn't say of course) so either way yeah i'm with you on your assessment. this cold session has been two weeks. which is 13 days to long.
Author chrisftw Posted March 11, 2013 Author Posted March 11, 2013 just an update on this without creating a new thread. like others said in the thread it wasn't really long before she started warming back up to me. in fact now she wants to work for my business (which was what i tested her on money wise) this was all literally about a week ago. i just didn't know what to make of it until now. i made a calculated risk to my own finances and sent her on a task. which I designed for her to either fail on or succeed depending on how well she can haggle/negotiate/charm. She actually made the deal with the client which i knew she could do just based on her looks and her social skills. SO now she wants to be a large part of my business. (i let her keep all the commission money) which is strange because while we do know each other. we are still KINDA, SORTA strangers. just interesting how she would jump into bed with me on this. but now she 'trust' me again although she does have her reservations but in drunken conversation she told me maybe a slip of tongue? that she had been thinking about me for quite awhile. i didn't really react to that (however i did find it surprising) to which she said that was the reason she likes talking/hanging/being around me. because i treat her like she's a person quick to call her out and not some goddess. she's opened up to me a lot more. sharing personal things but keeping the dirty details out as to not reveal to much. i don't probe i just sorta listen. just last night she called me and asked if i could talk for a minute. i asked her what she was doing she said she was looking for a book at the school library and it was dark on the upper floors so she just wanted to talk. the whole time she talked to me with a big smile on her face. (you can just tell). after we hung up. she texted me when she left the library. AND when she got home. none of which i responded to though. i did make an agressive move because she is playing hard to get while we were driving somewhere. and said that i know she likes hanging with me, thinks i'm a good time. AND that she likes me. She just smiled and implied i was the one in love with her. but the fact that FINALLY some type of emotion is on the table. i think i got this. thoughts?
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