Curious how to move forward

[fabulousgal]

Hello there,

 

So my boyfriend and I of 7 months discussed breaking up today (iniatiated by him). Was no surprise, we've been fighting, he's been stressed about no job. I did feel let down though because I was hoping it was a rough patch and I do really like him.

 

He actually expressed taking space first, and I reacted very fast with a no. Then he got very down and started talking about issues from his past, and that resulted in he's not happy and we should end. He was pretty adamant which confused me.

 

His issues with me are that he says I am distant and he has to pull things out of me (when something is wrong, in general he contacts me way more, and i don't really display PDA). He is right. I have been scared to open up. I have issues with him and his temper, but really thought once he had a job again he'd be less stressed out.

 

He also said he loves me but isn't in love because of the perceived distance. In the end, he agreed to just approach this with space and see if any of our issues can be resolved. I think they are totally resolvable.

 

Question though - I feel a little bummed and don't know if I should just leave him be, or contact him like normal. Since part of his issue is my distance, I don't want to wait for him, as I would usually do in a situation of space. If he isn't responsive, then I'll back off. Thoughts?

 

As far as working on myself, I am already a gym rat, have a pretty demanding job, friends and hobbies. I promised myself not to lose sight of that while this space thing is happening. I am certain though I can do some self-reflection though. I am slightly disappointed in myself for trying to reason with someone to stay. Not sure if I am being to hard on myself.

[Yookie]

You're only prolonging the inevitable. He wants out of the relationship and you need to let him go.

[fabulousgal]

You are probably right. I am just really surprised because there was no distance happening between us, we've been spending time together etc.