Kep37 Posted March 2, 2013 Posted March 2, 2013 Hi everyone, I am new here and hoping that I can vent a bit! I have been in a on / off relationship with an older man for last six years, i cant actually remember how many break up's we had, but they were usually every three months for about 8 weeks, we both agreed on this last attempt that it would be a final attempt, and I really did try to make it work. Our six years was good a lot of the time, very deep connections when we needed support the most. I would say the best think about "us" was the communication, we talked all the time, about everything. It was my support network, and I was his. But on so many levels we just don't work. Age being the biggest problem, 22 yrs. Theres lots of other niggley things but I shan't bore you with the details too much, we met online in a forum, when we both needed support and formed a close bond before even meeting, with hindsight I should have disconnected when I realised the age gap instead of wasting the last 6 years. My biggest problem is how to actually move on and form a new relationship, I miss him terribly because he was also my best friend. On previous busts up we tried very unsuccessfully to remain friends, and I know that total seperation with no contact is the only way we can maintain this break up and start to move on. I can't sleep, he is the last thing I think of before bed and the first thing in my head when I wake up. I throw myself into work throughout the day and can't wait till wine o'clock time so I can loose the anxious feeling I have stirring deep in me. It's the not knowing anything about him, where he is , what he is doing, who he is with, if he moves away, stays in the area, if he's happy the total loss of the connection hurts so much. I am not saying that I want to give it another go, I really do think we both tried hard but couldn't overcome the personality differences, age and family restraints. I don't have the energy to pour my heart and soul into another person, to reveal the true me ( which yes i do hide until you get to know me properly). Does anyone understand where I am coming from and have any ideas about a way forward?
Recommended Posts