parents are being to untrusting, me and bf need time alone, please help!!!

[shontelevision]

[color=darkblue]hello, i am 15 years of age, 16 in december. Last year i was sexually assulted, but i have coped with the matter very well, and i am now in the middle of my 1st relation ship, which is very seorise. my parents wont let him and i be in the same room together alone. i really trust this guy, he is very kind, and he treats me so well. he lives 40 mins away, and he drives out every weekand to come and see me. we have had sex once, that was because my parents went away, and i had him over. we both decided that we wanted to wait until i was 16 to have sex, and have our relationship based on feelings and getting to know each other

 

he is fully behind me 100%. i love him so very much, every day i am falling in love with him even more. he isnt attractive, but i love him because how he treats me, and how well we get along. he looks very young for his age, he is 18, but he looks like he is 16-17, which we told our parents that he is 17 turning 18 this year, due to regelations in australia which it is illegal for a person under 16 have sexual intercourse with person who is over 18

 

we very rarly get to see each other, but when we do, he comes over to stay here, my parents are always around, and they get angry at me if i am attatched to him (meaning that im cudeling him while watching tv, or they give me funny looks when we are holding hands.)

 

i want my parents to accept him, and let them trust us, i am a big girl, since i got assulted, i have matured alot. his parents fully support us, and his mother loves me, she lives about 2 hours away, and we were going to go and see them next weekand, but my parents wouldnt let me go away with him for the weekend.

 

it sucks hard core, due to how when we are together, we cant even talk normally, we have to watch out what we say, and its so sh**!!! i miss him very much, and im so sick of my parents treating me like a little girl, i want to be trusted, i can be trusted, but i dont know how to break it to my parents that they are babying me, and i need to have limits when him and i can be alone to talk, and we can hole hands, and express our feelings to one and another, please help, it would be very apreciated. thank you. xoxo[/color]

[Vie]

I think your parents are being really concern and worry about you, especially after what happened. Try to be in their position, I'm sure you will be worried to death as well.

I don't think you can blame them 100% for that. No matter what, they are still your parents. I'm sure they love you a lot.

 

 

Instead of being annoyed or pissed because of their reactions toward you and your bf, you should go and talk to them, maturely. Prove them that you ARE trustable.

 

 

You might have coped up with your trauma, but I think your parents haven't.

 

 

Good luck.

[pixie2004]

My parents used to be like that as well. (i am 23 and they are still like that) which is not a bad thing. They are only concerned. I don't really think that they can trust you - especially after you said that you already had sex cause your parents went away for the weekend. They trusted you at home and still you had sex.

 

I think your parents are only concervative and don't want you to make a mistake or get hurt.

 

Appreciate your parents. The day when they don't worry about you, or when they are not concerned about you THEN you should be worried cause they are concerned and worried cause they love you. There are so many people out there that would be greatful to have parents around. Stick by the rules while you live in your parents house. The day when you move out you can do whatever you want.

[Vie]

pixie2004, I couldn't agree with you more!

[pixie2004]

Shontelevision - are you still there?

[Lilyann]

You are concerned about how your parents are treating you, but you are lying to them. I am 26. My parents did not let me visit my boyfriend's grandparents (I was 23) with his whole family 4 hours away. What EXACTLY is bothering you??

[shontelevision]

hello, sorry i havent replied. i havent been online. i have been thinking, maybe my parents are right. i should just give them time, and maybe things will work out eventually. i have been having fights with every body because of our relation-ship. my grandfather yelled at me for having a boy friend, and called me a lier for what happeend to me last year (i got raped) i really like chris. he has been very nice to me, and he is helping me relize about guys aren't all that bad. i have discussed with him, i do not want a sexual relation-ship yet. i am telling him to give my parents time, he is, but he is all like 'if you want time alone, you have to talk to your parents.' but, like i want time alone, but i dont want to like fully rush things. when we had sex for the 1st time, i didnt want to do it, but then, as the night went on, i kept falling for him, and then we did it. i dono how to explain it. i like him lots. but yeah, hehehe sorry, im probably talking crap here. when i do talk to my parents, i dont know what to say. i dont expect them to let me stay at his at the moment, but i want them to let me go out with him during the day and all that. what should i say to my parents?

[Lilyann]

Talk to them about trust. How you have lost their trust and how you can regain it. You do have to remember that you are only 15. I was only allowed to go to school dances at 15, I was not allowed to go out alone with my boyfriend. Ask them if it is your boyfriend that they do not trust.