SuperSad09 Posted March 1, 2013 Posted March 1, 2013 I've been trying to do NC since the beginning of January. I have failed a few times. Anyway, I am SO depressed today. Some days are better than others but mostly deep down I just feel like I am never going to get over him and get through this. It will have been a year in April (nc since Jan but like I said he has contacted me a few times and I have given in a couple) Will I ever feel better? I am really starting to doubt it. I've even been seeing someone else, but it just reminds me how close I was with my ex-fiancé. Even when we were together I told him how I hadn't ever felt so close (physically, spiritually, etc) and I am so sad to think I may not ever again
lostindreams Posted March 1, 2013 Posted March 1, 2013 well i cant take away the pain, but i will tell you, over time, it gets better, maybe a little better every day, there is good days and bad days like you said. Keep dating other people, keep focusing on you, remember you came into the world without him, and you were happy once, before you even met him, and you CAN be happy again. it will take time. I am guessing that he is with someone else? or he does not want to be with you at all? No contact is the best. Cut it all. No text, call, nothin. But first, i recommend picking yourself up off the floor, taking up a hobby, getting your hair done, you know, those sorts of things. Letting him see that you are not sitting around dying over the breakup. Then cut contact. You will feel better someday. I am in the same boat right now I got broken up with a few weeks ago. he found someone else immediately. it hurts like hell but they say it gets better
Author SuperSad09 Posted March 2, 2013 Author Posted March 2, 2013 I'm pretty sure he is with someone else. He won't say, but he used to tell me no, and now he just refuses to answer the question. He keeps saying he wants to be friends (which obviously and for a number of reasons does not work for me). Part of me just feels so stupid for putting all this trust in him when we were together - I really never ever believed he would end things with me. I'm sorry you are going through this too. It really is the worst Thanks for your suggestions. I do need to continue to keep myself busy a d I gotta once and for all quit talking to him! It just gets so hard around the two week mark
Chi townD Posted March 2, 2013 Posted March 2, 2013 Well, first off, you're not in NC. Everytime you call him or talk to him, you're back at square one. You keep on opening up old wounds! What positive changes have you made in your life? New hairstyle? New wardrobe? Did you join a gym and go? Have you gotten any new hobbies? Go back to school? Have you traveled? You need to do these things to help you move forward. 1
lostindreams Posted March 2, 2013 Posted March 2, 2013 if he refuses to answer its pretty solid hes seeing somebody. My ex gives me that BS too about wanting to be friends! he even tells me that maybe if things with other girls dont work out he might possibly MAYBE come back to me! ha! I feel the same way. I am angry at myself, because i wasted so many years with my ex, when he said forever i believed it. maybe you can block his number? Remember you can check your phone all you want, check his social network sites, and he will never know, but NO CONTACT! god this is so hard for me too, i am like a crack addict whenever he texts me... how did my self esteem get so low? keeping busy is important. even putting in more hours at work or doing something productive will help
KatZee Posted March 2, 2013 Posted March 2, 2013 You can't move on if you're still in contact with your ex. NC means NO CONTACT. In every single way, shape and form. Snooping on Facebook... is contact. Also, if you remain in the mentality of being "convinced" you're never going to move on, you're right you're never going to move on. You lost a partner, your fiance. We've all lost someone here. But at the end of the day, you have so much to be thankful for in your life. There is so much positive still ahead of you that you are choosing to block out because you're dwelling on this ex. It gets better when you make the effort to go NC and stay NC. We can both agree that you don't feel good now, right? You need to get past that two week hump and continue on with it, and each day that passes will get better and better. Just know that you WILL feel better if you go NC but you won't feel better, ever, if you keep doing what you're doing. 2
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