Locust Posted February 28, 2013 Posted February 28, 2013 People say in college you can meet girls and I can say from experience that is not true, least in my case. I'm in a university I have yet to meet a girl who is interested in me and I would like to date. To make it even worse, I can't meet a girl at all. I'm taking my major courses and I always see the same faces for all classes so I can't meet anyone that way. However, I met a few but they seem to always be taken every time. I think I been cursed. I'm beginning to think I should go for online dating least that way I know for sure she is single otherwise she would not be on the site in the first place. But then I heard online dating is hard, but then I feel its either school or online dating where I can women. There are times where I see a lady standing at the bus stop and so tempting to say something to her but I'm nervous to because I'm afraid she may think I'm some freak or weird person. Just the other day I saw this cute German lady reading calculus book and I'm a math and science person and it was tempting to mention about the book she was reading but I didn't do it because I fear I might creep her out. I'm the kind of guy that wants a woman to approach first so then it won't feel she being creep out. But maybe that is the reason why I had never dated anybody. I catch a woman looking at me and I turn away and pretend I didn't notice it. I feel if I look at them too they might say hey what you looking at or just think I'm some weirdo. I met girls in the school but it was mainly through working in groups for assignments or some other way. Once I meet them I can communicate with the lady without any problems and I don't feel nervous talking to girls like how I use to. I remember couple years ago I use to say like few words and zip, it was quiet. But now I can carry a normal conversation. But its the ice breaking is where I need help, just striking that first conversation and how to go by asking her for date.
RudeAndNotGinger Posted February 28, 2013 Posted February 28, 2013 Everyone does the "turn away." That is why someone who holds your gaze can be so sexy, creepy, intimidating, scary, etc..... All I can say is this... I am not an unattractive woman.... But I went to a school with 70,000 people and barely even met a handful of FRIENDS.... it was too much for me. The two bfs I had at university, I met in random coincidences that had nothing to do with school, let-alone could be replicated ever again. Don't be scared to open a conversation with a stranger. If they aren't interested, take the cue and move on... But also be aware of your surroundings... what invites a stranger to approach and what doesn't.
thecrucible Posted February 28, 2013 Posted February 28, 2013 That's a hard one. Ice breaking is difficult because it's hard to do it, especially in a public place. In settings which are geared towards socialising it is a lot easier to break the ice. I have some ideas though. - Try and make people laugh. It's good to diffuse tension and most people respond to it well even if you aren't that funny. - Comment on what's going on around you or ask them something related to that. - Bear in mind that there are situations where there's no point in starting conversation. Don't ask for the date TOO EARLY. Let me explain, before you ask for the date you need to ask them appropriate questions to filter out anything that would stop a date from occurring or any obvious incompatibility. So if you're talking to someone on public transport, you might figure out they're not single, or they're only visiting the area, or maybe they aren't straight haha well you get what I mean. If I were you, I'd figure out if that person is regular on your route. If they're a regular, you can build up a rapport over a period of time. You see the problem? This is why most men don't approach women who are strangers. They don't know even if they are single and it doesn't usually produce results. If you don't approach women in public, you'll be acting like most men. I don't think you'll be missing much if you choose not to do this regularly. Solution: You're at college. Use that time wisely. College is the best situation to meet lots of people. Don't do online dating (it's a waste of time for younger people usually). Don't try chatting up women in public places (unless it's only to practice). Expand your social life at college and you'll have more of a chance.
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