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Was my birthday today. He popped in and dropped me a present when I was at work...

Nuna

By Nuna
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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Nuna Member

Nuna

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Seriously...I had friends at home for my birthday and then my ex messaged me "Hope you like your present". I was like...what? It turns out that he phoned my flatmate and he asked him if he could drop a present for me, so he came at home and left it. My flatmate didn't want to upset me so he didn't say anything, but when I got the message I found out what happened.

 

I was pretty clear on him that I still have feelings for him and I don't see him as a friend. Didn't he get that? We were together for 2 years, living together, he dumped me almost 2 months ago, he moved out just two weeks ago and we had a pretty clear chat about our feelings just 10 days ago... He said he doesn't love me anymore...I mean why did he do this? I don't think I gave him any sign I want to be friends. Seriously...I have mixed emotions. Of course in the back of head head I want him to come back, but I know this is just a nice gesture of him to show he thinks of me, but it was so inappropriate, as he was really hurtful towards the end.....

 

Thoughts dear people?

iouaname Established Member

iouaname

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I wouldn't think too much of it, I think that he probably just felt like he'd seem like a jerk if your birthday came and went and he didn't even bother at a gesture. It may not have been the right thing for you, but it was probably not coldly-calculated on his part.

 

Maybe it's also guilt? You said he was hurtful towards the end?

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Nuna Member

Nuna

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I wouldn't think too much of it, I think that he probably just felt like he'd seem like a jerk if your birthday came and went and he didn't even bother at a gesture. It may not have been the right thing for you, but it was probably not coldly-calculated on his part.

 

Maybe it's also guilt? You said he was hurtful towards the end?

 

well he was yes, but we had the 'closure' chat, so he could have just send a happy birthday message, not come all the way to my place and drop me a present, message me about it. Especially when last week he said "I'll disappear" because he got the fact I have different feelings than him. I didn't beg him to come back or anything, I just told him what hurt me, he explained his side and then we said goodbye. I was clear about my feelings, he was clear about his. The only thing he said is that he thinks about our break up in a more logical way, but his heart was somewhere lost...

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