Received email from ex today

[creighton0123]

Email was one line about internet bill.

 

I must say... I didn't feel much of anything when it came to his email. In two weeks, I think I've come a long way in reestablishing myself as an individual: Clean apartment, new roommate coming in on Saturday, new apartment for June 1, date on Friday with a cute guy.

 

I thought I would be moping about for a month, but I actually feel relieved. I had a good relationship that lasted 2 years - first year long distance. I don't regret that, but am looking forward to meeting someone else and taking another stab at longevity.

[na49]

I love your attitude on your BU.

 

Now how do I feel that way about mine? Just accepting that the relationship was a good one with a lot of fun times and that it ended. That I'll keep living my life and find love when I least expect it with someone who won't cheat on me.

[creighton0123]

Well, start by adjusting the line "when I least expect it"?

 

It might work out that way, but if you approach it like that it'll create an attitude of lonely anticipation.

 

How about "when I go out and get it"?

 

Although I do have the luxury of not facing infidelity as the cause of my relationship ending. It ended because it did. Not much I could have possibly done about that.

 

Here's what I did:

 

Was sad for a few days.

I talked to everyone that knew me and did not know my ex.

Got really angry for a day or two. This resulted in me almost fracturing my larynx while driving to my parents house.

Got out of town for a weekend and around people who love me unconditionally.

Rearranged furniture and switched rooms around to make the apartment different.

Planned social activities.

Began breaking into romance again by updating my okCupid profile.

 

In my mind, though, I know that it was a great relationship. One of the greatest of my life. For now. There is no reason to form an attachment to that which is gone, so the only option is to break attachment from it and form a new attachment with someone else who shares not only profound passion, but similar goals as me.

 

My last relationship had the passion without the goals, perhaps because of the age difference, but moreso because of the lifestyle difference. Me wanting to settle down and him not quite ready to do that.

[mammasita]

I also love the attitude you have.

 

I can relate to much of what you say. I'm definitley trying to get myself out there and meet people.

 

[creighton0123]

I also love the attitude you have.

 

I can relate to much of what you say. I'm definitley trying to get myself out there and meet people.

 

 

My thought is whether or not this constitutes breaking no contact. Our exchange was more proper than not. Just resolving last minute details. I'm still going to consider that I am currently 2.5 weeks into no contact and doing just fine given that the email from him didn't take me by surprise or shock.

[Debbie2508]

I could be wrong, but once you get to the (marvellous) stage that you're at,breaking NC is probably no big deal . The way I see it is that NC is to stop you hurting.....when contact no longer hurts, and you've no intention of trying to get your ex back,then there's no problem.

 

Well done..... wish I was there!!

[creighton0123]

Debbie,

 

Considering the relationship ended not too long ago, there's no purpose in my maintaining contact with him. He is, after all, not a part of my life anymore. I intend to keep it that way for quite some time. I feel as though if we had met and not dated, we wouldn't really be close friends. His style of friendship is much different than mine. I am much more intimate with my friends and keep a small circle of close friends instead of a large group of friends I only speak to every few weeks.

 

Talking via phone or face to face would still be pretty strange, only because I am intent on building a life without him in it.

[RomanceLow]

You're ex was in the military?

[creighton0123]

You're ex was in the military?

 

What made you think that?