Someone give me hope?! Haha.

[PrettyBoy88]

Good afternoon everyone! I'm new on here, my name is Kris and I'm not going to lie, I need your help, support, wisdom, honesty and advice.

 

I am 24 years old and my ex is 19. We dated for about a year; we moved in together because of a financial situation that was messing me up within 2-3 months of dating; we lived together for approximately 6 months, and then she moved out. Upon moving out, we stayed together for about 2-3 more months on and off which is leading me to this point.

 

We broke up last week, I believe February 18th, 2013. I'm not going to lie, she cheated and stuff, but I had since then took her back and I begged her to spend V-day with me. All the signs of an impending break up were there, they were and I knowingly didn't give a crap, I just wanted her being the selfish man I was. To give you some background information on our relationship in general, she knows me too well, she knows me more than anyone else in my life knows me, knows my flaws and accepted me for who i was. At one point, she really did love me.

 

We spent v-day, that night we spent together as well as the 15th through the 18th. Everything was perfect, she had to go home...when I called her, we got into an argument. "When she's with me, everything is great, but when she's not, she does'nt pick up her phone or text me back anytime soon, it was really hard to communicate with her and I'm not going to lie for the past 3-4 months I became really clingy with her; but I didn't know what to do.

 

So we've broken up many many times throughout our relationship in the past 3-4 months, but we ALWAYS made up. THIS TIME...it's different. We had a really really big fight in which led her to saying she was "having sex" with someone else while we were on the phone even though I knew she wasn't; and that led me to go ahead and post a status on FB saying I can't wait to spend the weekend with another female whom I tagged. We said some really mean things to each other that night ***both of us***. I also put it on FB that we're over and we're not getting back together. She then told me to take the FB post about us being over down and then she blocked me off FB. I begged and pleaded as I shouldn't have and she ended up putting a status and pics up in which a bunch of guys are giving her attention.

 

The next day, I tried to call her 3x and had my friend try and call but she just told us to stop calling via text. I decided to wait 3 days and I texted her a mini apology and her only response was "Bye." Since then I've been NC and it hasn't been that hard going NC, but I DO want to talk to her, I do want to hit her up; I want her to think about me like whenever I went NC on her after a mini break up it always worked; but this time was the last straw for her.

 

I know about all the do's and dont's blah blah blah, that NC is for the best. I know this. But I do want her back and I don't want her to enter a relationship before I say anything cause then I feel I"ll have lost my shot. Both men and women, I appreciate both perspectives. What is a young man like myself to do IF I DO WANT HER BACK? Sitting around and doing nothing has never really been my style. My goal is reconciliation.

 

***In the meantime, I'm talking to a bunch of woman just to keep myself occupied***

[AlexfromBoston]

Good afternoon everyone! I'm new on here, my name is Kris and I'm not going to lie, I need your help, support, wisdom, honesty and advice.

 

I am 24 years old and my ex is 19. We dated for about a year; we moved in together because of a financial situation that was messing me up within 2-3 months of dating; we lived together for approximately 6 months, and then she moved out. Upon moving out, we stayed together for about 2-3 more months on and off which is leading me to this point.

 

We broke up last week, I believe February 18th, 2013. I'm not going to lie, she cheated and stuff, but I had since then took her back and I begged her to spend V-day with me. All the signs of an impending break up were there, they were and I knowingly didn't give a crap, I just wanted her being the selfish man I was. To give you some background information on our relationship in general, she knows me too well, she knows me more than anyone else in my life knows me, knows my flaws and accepted me for who i was. At one point, she really did love me.

 

We spent v-day, that night we spent together as well as the 15th through the 18th. Everything was perfect, she had to go home...when I called her, we got into an argument. "When she's with me, everything is great, but when she's not, she does'nt pick up her phone or text me back anytime soon, it was really hard to communicate with her and I'm not going to lie for the past 3-4 months I became really clingy with her; but I didn't know what to do.

 

So we've broken up many many times throughout our relationship in the past 3-4 months, but we ALWAYS made up. THIS TIME...it's different. We had a really really big fight in which led her to saying she was "having sex" with someone else while we were on the phone even though I knew she wasn't; and that led me to go ahead and post a status on FB saying I can't wait to spend the weekend with another female whom I tagged. We said some really mean things to each other that night ***both of us***. I also put it on FB that we're over and we're not getting back together. She then told me to take the FB post about us being over down and then she blocked me off FB. I begged and pleaded as I shouldn't have and she ended up putting a status and pics up in which a bunch of guys are giving her attention.

 

The next day, I tried to call her 3x and had my friend try and call but she just told us to stop calling via text. I decided to wait 3 days and I texted her a mini apology and her only response was "Bye." Since then I've been NC and it hasn't been that hard going NC, but I DO want to talk to her, I do want to hit her up; I want her to think about me like whenever I went NC on her after a mini break up it always worked; but this time was the last straw for her.

 

I know about all the do's and dont's blah blah blah, that NC is for the best. I know this. But I do want her back and I don't want her to enter a relationship before I say anything cause then I feel I"ll have lost my shot. Both men and women, I appreciate both perspectives. What is a young man like myself to do IF I DO WANT HER BACK? Sitting around and doing nothing has never really been my style. My goal is reconciliation.

 

***In the meantime, I'm talking to a bunch of woman just to keep myself occupied***

 

People really need to relax with this Facebook stuff...which, in my opinion is rather immature. You really shouldn't be airing your dirty laundry all over a social network site...it's in poor taste and pointless. As your ex was a cheater you really shouldn't want her back, but as this is a second chance forum and you want to work things out I will give you my opinion. Maintain NC on your end for a minimum of three weeks. If she contacts you, respond late and give a rather cold, yet polite response. DO NOT jump to her calls or texts if she attempts to contact you during these three weeks. DO NOT ignore her all together. Now, upon completing the three weeks, shoot her an email thanking her for the nice times and fond memories. Chances are she will respond and then you can snowball your efforts from there. If you can somehow seal the deal within the three weeks of NC then by all means, do what you have to do. But it's important that you appear confident and calm.