annie83 Posted September 2, 2004 Posted September 2, 2004 Hi guys, you are pretty much my last hope for some words of advice. Problem -- boyfriend of 4 yrs broke up with me abruptly and is no longer interested in speaking to me ever. I say abruptly, because the reason for which he did this was petty and practically insignificant, however, we HAD been going through some rough points ever since he had started hanging out with another girl. As I understand it, he heard I had said something about him, and what it is, he apparently doesn't even know. He told me he's heard it from more than a few people, even those he sees at school. My issue is that I don't know anyone he knows from his school (obviously, I never said anything to them for that reason), and I'm confused because he insists he doesn't even know what I supposedly said about him. I admit, when his attitude/personality changed when he started hanging out with this other girl (and it was an OBVIOUS 360 in personality/attitude) we found ourselves in fights frequently, over stupid things. That girl has since left him, but far as I know, he still hates me/refuses to speak to me. He even tells mutual friends not to bring me around in his presence. I guess the other problem is, his friends are also my friends, and we're all very close. It's difficult when he comes up in conversation, but helpful when they can give insight to his psyche. For example, two of them have had similar problems with him "dumping them" as friends, not speaking to him for a year or so, and then him coming back to them eventually. For this reason, most of them think he'll at least be back to me as a friend. He hasn't had good luck with women, far as I know, but I tend to prefer not to hear about it and deal with my own love life. It's just hard to have such close friends mutually. So I'm hoping to reconcile this friendship with him at some point. But at this time, I fear it's hopeless. I never cheated on him. Never lied, never hurt him. Just gave unconditional love... far as I know, this story about me telling his friends stories or whatever about him is a lie. How do you reconcile things with someone who's basing their hatred on lies, though? Any advice would be appreciated.
sock83 Posted September 3, 2004 Posted September 3, 2004 hey, It seems to me that this guy is being very immature and the only way he can see that is to find out himself, if it's true and it sounds to me that it is that this other girl was changing him maybe even saying bad things about you when he would talk to her about you i dont' know but something has changed. It seems that this guy is eaisly led and really doesnt know who he is, i really think you deserve to be treated better than that and he should be the one to beg your freindship back. Chin up go and do your thing and it's only a suggestion but play fire with fire ignore him give him a taste of his medacine and see how he likes it to be treated like it. You sound to me that you are a nice genuine person and he's got all the issues, let him deal with it because in the end if he doesnt shape up he will loose you his freinds and he will end up alone not you. Anyway hope all goes well, excuse my abruptness it just seems like he's being immature and he's playing with your emotions to get some sort of attention... i i idont know. sock 83
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