Drseussgrrl Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Yup. That's not bashing because if a woman is questioning dating him just because of his actions related to his job status then he deserves to be left alone to find someone that would appreciate him regardless of his job status, hence better because she would appreciate him more than the OP. "...regardless of his job status..." Sorry but for those of us with a strong work ethic, an unemployed 37-year-old living with his parents is simply not attractive. Moving home would never be an option for me unless I had to be taken care of due to ill health.
Els Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Yup. That's not bashing because if a woman is questioning dating him just because of his actions related to his job status then he deserves to be left alone to find someone that would appreciate him regardless of his job status, hence better because she would appreciate him more than the OP. .............. Very nice backpedaling. I'll bear this in mind so I can bash dudes freely for choosing not to date morbidly obese women, since the woman deserves to be left alone to find someone 'better' who would appreciate her regardless of her weight.
Woggle Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 I think it would depend on the circumstances. Both my wife and I had to move in with our in laws for four months recently because of circumstances. We are back home now but to us it was better than paying for a hotel for all that time. I don't think that makes us losers.
kimberlydoll Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Itd honestly depend on how much I liked the person. Also, if they are looking for a job close to me. I just finished grad school and only looked for jobs close to me. I went on a few dates with recent graduates that were applying to jobs in other states so I didnt see the point in continuing to date them when there was a good chance theyd be moving.
IndianGuy87 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 "...regardless of his job status..." Sorry but for those of us with a strong work ethic, an unemployed 37-year-old living with his parents is simply not attractive. Moving home would never be an option for me unless I had to be taken care of due to ill health. No one is telling you and other women to date them. And since the OP probably thinks the same then I told her to not continue dating him since he deserves someone better who is willing to look past that and just look at his positive traits. Most people who never had a degree in their mid-30's would just give up but this guy seems to be quite ambitious. He is trying not to let his past failures reflect his future and if the OP is seriously questioning all this and is concerned about it, then for his sake she shouldn't date him. Like you said, most of you don't find it attractive so it's best not to play around with the guy who is already going through losing a job and moving to his parents, especially since he's on the brink to finishing his graduate degree. The OP should find someone better for herself that has more money and who's job is much more stable!
Drseussgrrl Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 No one is telling you and other women to date them. And since the OP probably thinks the same then I told her to not continue dating him since he deserves someone better who is willing to look past that and just look at his positive traits. Most people who never had a degree in their mid-30's would just give up but this guy seems to be quite ambitious. He is trying not to let his past failures reflect his future and if the OP is seriously questioning all this and is concerned about it, then for his sake she shouldn't date him. Like you said, most of you don't find it attractive so it's best not to play around with the guy who is already going through losing a job and moving to his parents, especially since he's on the brink to finishing his graduate degree. The OP should find someone better for herself that has more money and who's job is much more stable! You're missing the point. It's not about the money. Also I know a lot of adults who go back to school because they are delaying getting a job. You can earn your graduate degree while you work. 1
Emilia Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 No one is telling you and other women to date them. And since the OP probably thinks the same then I told her to not continue dating him since he deserves someone better who is willing to look past that and just look at his positive traits. Most people who never had a degree in their mid-30's would just give up but this guy seems to be quite ambitious. He is trying not to let his past failures reflect his future and if the OP is seriously questioning all this and is concerned about it, then for his sake she shouldn't date him. Like you said, most of you don't find it attractive so it's best not to play around with the guy who is already going through losing a job and moving to his parents, especially since he's on the brink to finishing his graduate degree. The OP should find someone better for herself that has more money and who's job is much more stable! You have built a nice little fictional character out of a man you don't know? You will be set up for a lot of disappointments in life if you just look at someone's positive traits by the way. Bad and good make up a person, the trick is to find what you can healthily live with. It's not smart to look at the good only and ignore the bad. 1
IndianGuy87 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 You're missing the point. It's not about the money. Also I know a lot of adults who go back to school because they are delaying getting a job. You can earn your graduate degree while you work. Whether you're aware of it or not, money has everything to do with it. Women wouldn't question about men being responsible or not if he was blessed to have all the money in the world but be one of the most irresponsible person on Earth. Rather than doing anything, he'd just sit back and not do anything since his parents were so well off with their business that even when he would basically do nothing he would still make a lot of money. Work and education is all about money and women obviously stress huge importance on them because of money. Men, not so much even though in the present society women are getting almost the same benefits as men in the education and work department, hence making almost just as much.
Drseussgrrl Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Whether you're aware of it or not, money has everything to do with it. Women wouldn't question about men being responsible or not if he was blessed to have all the money in the world but be one of the most irresponsible person on Earth. Rather than doing anything, he'd just sit back and not do anything since his parents were so well off with their business that even when he would basically do nothing he would still make a lot of money. Work and education is all about money and women obviously stress huge importance on them because of money. Men, not so much even though in the present society women are getting almost the same benefits as men in the education and work department, hence making almost just as much. Wrong again. I dated a very wealthy guy last year, who had a huge house, a luxury car, a boat and everything at his disposal. And this was simply because he came from family money. He didn't work and was studying for the bar exam to go back to law school. I dumped him because I got sick of dating someone who spent all day in sweat pants going on walks with his dogs while I worked.
IndianGuy87 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 You have built a nice little fictional character out of a man you don't know? You will be set up for a lot of disappointments in life if you just look at someone's positive traits by the way. Bad and good make up a person, the trick is to find what you can healthily live with. It's not smart to look at the good only and ignore the bad. Fictional character? So trying to finish your graduate degree isn't a positive trait? That's a fiction rather than a fact the OP provided? And since he never had a degree by now or did not have a degree he was satisfied with, he's willing to finish a graduate degree at 37 rather than not like the OP suggested. That's not a positive trait? It's a fiction rather than fact? Boy, you're something!
StanMusial Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 He sounds like a loser. I'm his age exactly and I own my home. I wouldn't even consider grad school unless my living expenses were handled first. I couldn't just move in on someone else, where would I put all my shyt? I know time are tough, and I've been fortunate and for this I am thankful. But I put in a lot of effort to be financially secure at this stage in life, and many people didn't or made other poor decisions to meet such an outcome. So OP you are correct to question it. 2
Emilia Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Fictional character? So trying to finish your graduate degree isn't a positive trait? That's a fiction rather than a fact the OP provided? And since he never had a degree by now or did not have a degree he was satisfied with, he's willing to finish a graduate degree at 37 rather than not like the OP suggested. That's not a positive trait? It's a fiction rather than fact? Boy, you're something! You said 'he is trying not to have his past failures reflect his future'? Erm, do you know him? The point is not whether his trying to finish his graduate degree is good or not but whether the OVERALL PACKAGE (sorry for shouting but you are hard of hearing) is fine for a 37 year-old. I might be 'something' but at least I'm not thick.
IndianGuy87 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Wrong again. I dated a very wealthy guy last year, who had a huge house, a luxury car, a boat and everything at his disposal. And this was simply because he came from family money. He didn't work and was studying for the bar exam to go back to law school. I dumped him because I got sick of dating someone who spent all day in sweat pants going on walks with his dogs while I worked. Why would you want him to work if he was trying to go back to law school. That's stupid. Especially if he has money. I'm in med-school and studying can be quite hectic but things like playing sports, going on long walks, or to the gym can be soothing and freshen up my mind when I go back to studying.
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 What is the problem, guys? Why so defensive and quick to vilify a woman who takes things like job status and living situation into account when deciding whether a man will be a good dating or relationship prospect for her? Why do you think this makes her out to be BAD? Do you guys who are crying about this OP have ANY standards or requirements about women / girls you are willing to consider for a relationship? I mean, besides their inner kindness? 5
Emilia Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Why would you want him to work if he was trying to go back to law school. That's stupid. Especially if he has money. I'm in med-school and studying can be quite hectic but things like playing sports, going on long walks, or to the gym can be soothing and freshen up my mind when I go back to studying. Erm... he hasn't got the money? Isn't that the point of the whole thread?
Els Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 he's willing to finish a graduate degree at 37 rather than not like the OP suggested. That's not a positive trait? Nope, absolutely not. Especially not if it entails moving in with his parents at the age of 37. Graduate degrees are not a magic ticket to a job. Experience counts a lot more in most industries. The only real use of graduate degrees are if you want to work in academia. With that in mind, people should only do them if: 1) they do them early in life, setting themselves back financially a little in their 20s but are considered an investment towards an academic-track career path, or 2) they have saved up a lot and can afford to support themselves while doing it later on in life.
Els Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 What is the problem, guys? Why so defensive and quick to vilify a woman who takes things like job status and living situation into account when deciding whether a man will be a good dating or relationship prospect for her? Why do you think this makes her out to be BAD? Do you guys who are crying about this OP have ANY standards or requirements about women / girls you are willing to consider for a relationship? I mean, besides their inner kindness? Apparently obesity is a reflection of laziness, apathy, and lack of care for oneself, but zero savings at 37 and an unfinished graduate degree is not. 1
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 For the outraged guys on this thread: In the world where I've been living all my life, men also take how a woman's been supporting herself and how she chooses to live her life into consideration when deciding whether pursuing a relationship with her would be a good idea for them. Don't you guys do this too? Tell the truth. 2
Drseussgrrl Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Why would you want him to work if he was trying to go back to law school. That's stupid. Especially if he has money. I'm in med-school and studying can be quite hectic but things like playing sports, going on long walks, or to the gym can be soothing and freshen up my mind when I go back to studying. Because I like a man who works. I know, crazy right?! 2
IndianGuy87 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 You said 'he is trying not to have his past failures reflect his future'? Erm, do you know him? The point is not whether his trying to finish his graduate degree is good or not but whether the OVERALL PACKAGE (sorry for shouting but you are hard of hearing) is fine for a 37 year-old. I might be 'something' but at least I'm not thick. Not having a degree at that age or not having a degree that you desire (if he has a previous degree but considers it undesirable hence studying for one which he wants), whichever reason maybe make his past failures for not having a graduate degree which he wanted to by now. But hey, better late than never like they say which I already mentioned. Pretty ironic of saying I'm hard of hearing. They also say "you gotta keep your head up" and hope for the best. And I don't know what you're arguing about over here. I'm not telling you to date a guy like him nor the OP to date him. I said no, don't date him What are you trying to argue over here?
Emilia Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Because I like a man who works. I know, crazy right?! You will say you like them assertive, capable and independent next! What has the world come to! 2
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Apparently obesity is a reflection of laziness, apathy, and lack of care for oneself, but zero savings at 37 and an unfinished graduate degree is not. I'm sure a 37 unemployed woman living at home with her parents would be much sought after by these same indignant fellows, as well. Unless they thought that she was no longer "biologically useful." 3
Emilia Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 And I don't know what you're arguing about over here. I'm not telling you to date a guy like him nor the OP to date him. I said no, don't date him What are you trying to argue over here? We are on a messaging board, people put their views accross and argue for or against others' view. It's what messaging boards are for :confused:
IndianGuy87 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Because I like a man who works. I know, crazy right?! Yup. Pretty crazy when you didn't appreciate his ambitiousness of wanting a more prestigious degree and chose to study rather than work because of it. Those exams are TOUGH!!
Emilia Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Unless they thought that she was no longer "biologically useful." that old chestnut. There will be a thread on this I can sense it in my water 3
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