tom22 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Hi all, I need a bit of advice about how to handle the situation I'm in. I'll try and be as brief as I can... So, I've met this girl online (she is 21, I am 22). We have had 3 dates so far and each date has been lovely. She is great company and we get on really well. We have kissed, and cuddled infront of a movie, but nothing more. Now, although she is lovely, and I do like her, I really can't see it turning into a relationship. One of the problems is that she lives about 1 hour and 45 minutes drive away from me, and she doesn't drive, which means I have to do the travelling. I would be prepared to travel to see a girl that I liked, but the more I've seen of this girl, the more I think that I don't really have any strong feelings for her and it makes me less keen to put the effort into going to see her. I am pretty sure that she really likes me, and I get the impression that she is a very sensitive person who would be easily upset. And thats kinda the reason I need to end it now before it goes any further - I just dont want to sting her along. So basically, I'd like some advice on how to go about ending it in the nicest way in order not to upset her too much. Would a text explaining that I don't want to string her along be sufficient? Any advice would be great!
Author tom22 Posted February 25, 2013 Author Posted February 25, 2013 Thanks. Thats the easiest way to do it I suppose.
salparadise Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 So basically, I'd like some advice on how to go about ending it in the nicest way in order not to upset her too much. Would a text explaining that I don't want to string her along be sufficient? Any advice would be great! A text, are you serious? At a minimum give her the courtesy of a phone call. That way you can be friendly, kind and show her some respect. It will allow her to communicate too rather than just having been informed. It's won't be as easy for you, obviously, but if you want to be honorable and respectful you need to step up and do it right.
Cutiepie1976 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 I agree. It's been three dates face-to-face. Call her up and tell her that it's not working out. The distance is far more difficult than you had realized, and a relationship would be impossible. I always broke up in person, but I think a phone call is fine. Based on the concerns you voice here, you sound like a nice, thoughtful, compassionate guy who is respectful of other people's feelings. Don't ruin that impression with her, on the way out, by ditching her over text. I think you can do better than that.
Author tom22 Posted February 27, 2013 Author Posted February 27, 2013 Thanks for the advice guys! I agree. It's been three dates face-to-face. Call her up and tell her that it's not working out. The distance is far more difficult than you had realized, and a relationship would be impossible. I always broke up in person, but I think a phone call is fine. Based on the concerns you voice here, you sound like a nice, thoughtful, compassionate guy who is respectful of other people's feelings. Don't ruin that impression with her, on the way out, by ditching her over text. I think you can do better than that. Cutiepie1976 - thank you for the kind words! I decided to take the advice and I gave her a call last night. I was completely honest and explained that I couldn't see us progressing into a relationship and that the distance between us would just prove more difficult as time goes on. I said I'd be happy to keep in touch, but judging by the fact that she has since deleted and blocked me on FB I'm guessing thats not going to happen! Being someone who isn't very experienced with dating, this was kind of the first time I have been the one to end anything I've had with a girl and although I feel bad if I've upset her, I am, in a way, happy that I think I've handled it fairly well. And so... the frustration of searching for the girl for me will now continue! Thanks again for the help guys!
kimberlydoll Posted February 27, 2013 Posted February 27, 2013 Id recommend when choosing girls online to choose women who live closer to you. You have to realllllly into someone to be willing to drive 2 hrs each way all the time and odds are, it wont work. I did online dating for a bit and I had the same thing happen to me except I was 21 at the time and didnt tell the guy it was due to the distance.
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