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Shouldn't it be getting easier?


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Posted

But why am I having such a hard time?

 

It's 23 days post breakup and 9 days of NC today.

 

I don't know why but it seems to be getting more diffcult for me. For the past 3 days I'd been crying, and I'm in no mood to do anything at all. I was doing fine at the start, I did my own things, I played video games, listened to my favourite music, went out with friends, but now I'm just a wreck. Shouldn't it only be getting easier? Why is this not working for me? Why is he not upset at all? Did he really mean it when he said our relationship meant nothing to him? Sorry I'm venting again, I'm really hurt and this is so painful for me. I feel like a failure.

Posted

I've been NC for almost three months and it has gotten better for me for the most part. There are still up and down days but mostly up now. Just hang in there and it does get better.

Posted

I am also going 9 days now, first she was texting daily few times pleading and declaring love and it gave me good reason and felt good to ignore her, but she stoped and although I still keep ignoring her, I feel like she has given up, feels very sad realy, I know that I have no hopes of getting back, dont think she will ever be able to stop cheating if she even cheated while pregnant.

 

I do cry alot at night when I'm alone, this is one thing I have shockingly learned about myself.I have a feeling of total loss.Its hard realy and when I read 4 months in so many posts my heart just sinks, its real hell man, I feel like running back and endure the torture and pain.

 

But tNC is the only proven way to get out of this circle which would otherwise not exist if there was enough love to prevent the cheating.

 

I should encourage us to keep on track despite the endless hell,

Posted
But why am I having such a hard time?

 

It's 23 days post breakup and 9 days of NC today.

 

I don't know why but it seems to be getting more diffcult for me. For the past 3 days I'd been crying, and I'm in no mood to do anything at all. I was doing fine at the start, I did my own things, I played video games, listened to my favourite music, went out with friends, but now I'm just a wreck. Shouldn't it only be getting easier? Why is this not working for me? Why is he not upset at all? Did he really mean it when he said our relationship meant nothing to him? Sorry I'm venting again, I'm really hurt and this is so painful for me. I feel like a failure.

 

Unfortunately "no" it doesn't get easier.

Posted

its only been 9 days of nc. keep at it you'll get there. took me 6 months to feel like im back on my feet again.

 

hang around ls... the ppl are helpful

 

in the mean time go blow some stuff up in ps2 or something

Posted
Unfortunately "no" it doesn't get easier.

 

Sure it does. You just didn't go NC right away and got strung along.

 

OP it does get better I'm about 5 months NC and can tell you the searing pain does go away. The thing is it isn't linear. So there will be many times it feel like you are moving forward them BAM. You just need to work thru it and feel the pain then get back up. Over and over again. It is a process. Rock on! Cav

Posted

Of course it gets easier, but you have to actually work at it, and not "wait" for things to get better. You need to move on and actually not want to be with that person anymore. I sure as hell wouldn't if I were you.

 

Also, are you PMSing? I cry a lot when I'm PMSing, and over the stupidest ****.

Posted

aww :( its been 3 months since BU and 7 days NC, its not easy.

 

Taking each day as it comes :(

 

hugs! xx

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Posted

Thanks guys for your replies. Now it's 12 days of NC and nothing. I'm still numb and just trying to do my own things to take my mind off him. He's not even reaching out for me. Seems like he's really bent on forgetting me. Or maybe he has already forgotten me.

Posted
Thanks guys for your replies. Now it's 12 days of NC and nothing. I'm still numb and just trying to do my own things to take my mind off him. He's not even reaching out for me. Seems like he's really bent on forgetting me. Or maybe he has already forgotten me.

 

No way he has forgotten you. Just know that. He maybe moving forward but he won't forget you that fast. I know its hard but try as hard as you can not to dwell on it. No one no matter how much they don't want to be with their ex will just forget about them. There are dumpers on this site that got cheated on and left their ex and they still miss their ex. So its just not likely. he might be fighting to get used to being without you.

 

If he resolved to do so he will. My ex was and she has managed not let us get back together even though I know she still loves me she told me so. She knows if I was with her face to face right now she would be all over me. I know because it already happened to me when I saw her a month ago. Sometimes the ex needs to move on not because of what they feel now but where they want to be tomorrow. You cannot fight that resolve. Just accept it. Its nothing that you did its what they need or want, and you have no control over that.

Posted
Sure it does. You just didn't go NC right away and got strung along.

 

OP it does get better I'm about 5 months NC and can tell you the searing pain does go away. The thing is it isn't linear. So there will be many times it feel like you are moving forward them BAM. You just need to work thru it and feel the pain then get back up. Over and over again. It is a process. Rock on! Cav

 

True but we have barely communicated we were NC most of that time. Only LC here and there. But still I haven't seen her on a long time I should be a lot better by now. I have gotten used to not communicating with her but I still miss her dearly.

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