blue_jay_bird Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Can someone please tell me how someone can spend 7 years with someone and not even try to work on issues, just dump them never look back, replace you in a month. I know, I know everyone will just say move on, let go. I just don't understand it just feels so ****ing cold. So cold. I'm still crushed, Im not doing well. I just don't know what to do anymore.
stevie_23 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Ever heard of the 7 year itch, my friend? It can happen at any time, but it’s called 7 years for a reason I guess. I think this may have been around the time I started to feel differently about my own partner, and I pushed those changing feelings away and ignored them for years before finally admitting to myself I was no longer in love with her. I still care for her and love her deeply, but I had an affair that lasted almost 2 years and I was truly in love with this other person. People’s feelings change, simple as that. Especially over a fairly long period of time, such as 7 years. It’s a shame, and it’s unfortunate, and it really, really hurts, but it’s nobody’s fault. You did nothing wrong. You just have to try to eventually realise, after time and healing and some distance, that the relationship ending does not mean it was not a genuine and deeply loving relationship during your time together. The end does not negate the meaning of the duration. It also does not mean you are not a worthwhile person. Your ex chose to leave because he / she was no longer happy in the relationship. The fact they were able to move on in a month and “replace” you shows that either they’re upset about things and just trying to fill the hole left by the loss of you, or they had fallen out of love with you previously, a while ago, and have developed feelings for someone else so soon after ending the relationship because emotionally they’d distanced themselves already, even if they didn’t want this to happen.
Navajo46 Posted February 25, 2013 Posted February 25, 2013 Can someone please tell me how someone can spend 7 years with someone and not even try to work on issues, just dump them never look back, replace you in a month. I know, I know everyone will just say move on, let go. I just don't understand it just feels so ****ing cold. So cold. I'm still crushed, Im not doing well. I just don't know what to do anymore. I know how you feel trust me. I just went through 6 year relationship and the same thing... Heck my ex didnt even wait until the relationship was over to find someone new. She was as cold as could be too and I even told her that numerous times to the point she got mad. I have read this many places and in reflection of my relationship it rings absolutely true. My ex checked out a long time ago. It seemed sudden but its been three months now and i look back and see all the signs over the months prior to BU. Mine told me she loved me all the time... But those were just words. She never did anything for me. But i did love her very much. Its going to be hard without a doubt. I was damn near non functional with the pain i was feeling for 2 months. But it does get better. The pain goes away when you finally accept things. I told people many times that i had accepted things but it is only true now. Youll let go when your ready, but dont contact. I hope things get better for you soon.
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