bullet2myheart Posted September 2, 2004 Posted September 2, 2004 i'm still not over the girl that i broke up with almost three years ago. i constantly think and dream about her. i miss her so much and all i do is reminice (sp?) about the past times i've had with her. even when im not thinking about her before i go to sleep ill randomly dream about her.. what the hell is that? and then I wake up all sad wishing that i can sleep forever atleast i'll be with her in my dreams. and ever since i broke up with her my life has plummeted to an all time low. i lost the majority of my friends, im not interested in the hobbies that i used to enjoy, i have low self esteem, and seem to lose all my confidence. it's like im depressed. i always read her letters from when we used to go out and look at the pictures we took when we were a couple... im happy when i see it but it saddens me. the worst thing is that i have no relationship with her whatsoever.. not even friendship.. even though i believe she considers me a friend. i've spoken to her numerous times ever since the breakup but whenever she says hold on someone's on the other line it's her b/f (who i know.. and i believe he's bitter and has a grudge against me) and he doesn't approve of her talking to me.... but i know for a fact that sometime after we broke up she has feelings for me because i was at her friends house who happens to be my friend also and i picked up the phone to use it but my friend was talking to my ex. and i was dialing numbers until i got disrupted and i was like oh im sorry i didnt know you were on the phone.. and i acted like i hung up but they were still conversing... and i heard my ex say something like it's hard to hear his voice... or something like that and she had a light voice when she said it like you know when someones about to cry...but then i dunno. recently she gave me her cell phone # when i called her but then her punk b/f isn't being mature about it and doesnt want her to talk to me. i mean i'm not trying to interfere with their relationship but I'm trying my best to build a frienship with her... but it's hard. I just dont know. I just want to be someone in her life somehow. i'm justb waiting for the time when i see her again in person w/o her boyfriend by her side........ theres so many things i want to tell her... i just need a hug from her and i bet i can get out of this deep dark hole.. what do i do? can someone tell me how i can be a important figure in her life? what should i do.. i dont wanna send her cards or flowers or just visit her in the middle of nowhere.. that'll be sorta rude and i dont wanna seem like a stalker.....oh my god someone please help me..it hurts....
Istandalone Posted September 2, 2004 Posted September 2, 2004 I'm so sorry hun, sounds like you have had a broken heart for a long time. I'm not sure what you should do, but maybe trying to get over her would be best. It's been a few years, and most likely she has moved past this. It's your turn to let go now. Remember the hobbies that you have since neglected, make new friends, and work on yourself. Don't think of yourself as lacking since she's gone. Pick yourself up and do something for yourself. What is something that you used to do that she didn't enjoy? Maybe you could start out doing those things and think of how it wouldn't be done if she were still around. If all else fails, you can turn on your stereo and cry until the cows come home. If it's really meant to be, you'll get her back without even trying. If not, you'll find someone who's ready to love you as much as you deserve to be loved. And hey, there are plenty of single girls in this place that are looking for love as well!
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