silvermercy Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 Can single women adopt where you live? Yes, I think so... But I'd need to double-check though. Or I will take Angelina Jolie's example! lol I hope it doesn't come to that!
somedude81 Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 This woman probably has had hundreds of men interested in her. But she decides that none of them are good enough for her and gets a sperm donor. Hopefully no man would be stupid enough to enter a relationship with her from now on. I feel sorry for the baby.
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 This woman probably has had hundreds of men interested in her. But she decides that none of them are good enough for her and gets a sperm donor. Maybe all those guys were overweight. 1
Phoe Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 I know I sound like a broken record, but all my life I've had a hard time finding a relationship. I've had 2, and both were pretty bad to be honest. I am not single by choice, I cannot find a man who wants to be with me. Can I find a man who'd be happy to bone me? Probably, but that's not what I'm looking for. I want a relationship. I'm not picky either. I'm not "holding out" for some perfect prince charming, I'm not rejecting perfectly decent guys in hopes for something better (I'm not rejecting anyone at all actually, I'm not actually being pursued... although a coworker of mine told me yesterday that he knows someone who would like to meet me! He was being very mysterious about it but hey, maybe someone is interested!) Anyway, I'd be happy to just find a guy who likes me for me, puts in the effort to make me happy and actively shows that he's happy to have me in his life, someone I can be happy to share myself and my life with, and treats me with respect and kindness. That's all I want!! 2
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 Can single women adopt where you live? They certainly can adopt where I live. Where can't single women adopt?
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 I am not single by choice, I am left out to dry by the world. I have come to a conclusion in recent years, which is that men would rather have trashy girls or ones who will submit to them and take care of them rather than one who does otherwise. So … are you saying that all of us who are in relationships are either trashy or doormats? I hope not. You have not been "left out to dry by the world." Men are not any more likely to be bad people than we women are, and once we're adults, most of us can look at our own choices and behavior and see clearly how we've got to wherever we are. If you quit with the blaming I predict that things will get a lot better quickly. 1
Phoe Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 I reckon that people are too quick to assume something is easy for another person, when we cannot really truly know. Problems are still problems, no matter how trivial the other person thinks they are. I get the impression that because a woman is having a hard time finding a relationship, some guys think it's all because she's "rejecting all the decent guys" and going for perfection. This may be the case with Monica Cruz, but I doubt it's the case for a lot of women struggling to find a relationship. It may be easy in theory, but in practice, it can lead to settling for a "make-do" relationship or someone they simply do not click with. I never assume it's easy for anyone to get into a relationship - it's difficult for lots of people to get into one and sustain it.....even pretty women. THIS... I'm frequently called a liar on this forum, and it's starting to bring me down. I'm here because I have a crap love life and I want help, I want to learn, I want to do something to improve my chances of finding a really great relationship, and I get called a liar, dismissed, and laughed at. When the men here assume that a OK looking young female ought to have men constantly pursuing her and trying to date her, seeing myself literally have the most difficult time makes me wonder what the heck is wrong with me... it sucks, truth be told. 2
fortyninethousand322 Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 I remember when I was in college (before I had a regular group of friends I'd hang with) and in between classes I'd sit in the main building. Many many times I'd see a woman sitting there by herself and I'd think "maybe I should go talk to her" and right before I'd worked up the nerve to go over, there comes her boyfriend. This happened so often I'd eventually figured there weren't any single women anywhere. Of course I was wrong, and of course observing a college environment and extrapolating that out to society as a whole is not a good way of doing things. But, for what it's worth, the "paired up" women I observed far outnumber the "paired up" men.
xxoo Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 But, for what it's worth, the "paired up" women I observed far outnumber the "paired up" men. How is that possible? Are they paired up with other women? 1
fortyninethousand322 Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 The problem, IMO, for women is that most of the good men are gone by their mid to late 20s. What's usually left are players, workaholics, or really inexperienced losers. The first group uses women or mislead them. The second never has time for them. And the third doesn't attract them. Unless you're really into a fixer upper of some kind, it's really tough for women to date and find good relationships these days. 1
fortyninethousand322 Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 How is that possible? Are they paired up with other women? The campus wasn't evenly split 50-50. Once you subtract the very large number of nursing students (who tended to keep to their own end of campus) the college skewed mostly male. Basically, I saw more men sitting by themselves than I did women. There are other issues too involving the seen vs the unseen (for example I wasn't around the entire campus all day so there could conceivably be a different trend in other places at other times of the day). I'm just giving an example of what I observed.
Phoe Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 The problem, IMO, for women is that most of the good men are gone by their mid to late 20s. What's usually left are players, workaholics, or really inexperienced losers. The first group uses women or mislead them. The second never has time for them. And the third doesn't attract them. I sometimes wonder if I don't get a move on if I'll be left with nothing... I know it's a silly thing to be paranoid about but I can't help it. I wouldn't want to deal with a player, that's a given... a workaholic, well, that would be difficult but under certain circumstances would probably be acceptable, as long as the time we DID spend together was really great. But I am okay with someone who is inexperienced. In fact, I probably wouldn't mind it much at all, as I'm sure he'd make up for it in his willingness to learn. It's all about effort with me, it's OK if a guy doesn't get things right at first as long as he tried and meant well. And well "loser" is a relative term. I'm the last person who oughta be calling anyone a loser, lol.
xxoo Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 The problem, IMO, for women is that most of the good men are gone by their mid to late 20s. What's usually left are players, workaholics, or really inexperienced losers. The first group uses women or mislead them. The second never has time for them. And the third doesn't attract them. Unless you're really into a fixer upper of some kind, it's really tough for women to date and find good relationships these days. I agree that the desirable men wanting to open their hearts to a woman will mostly have paired off by mid to late 20s (even if not yet married). The "good" news is, many of them end up as heart-broken divorced men in their 30s-40s 2
StanMusial Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 I sometimes wonder if I don't get a move on if I'll be left with nothing... I know it's a silly thing to be paranoid about but I can't help it. I wouldn't want to deal with a player, that's a given... a workaholic, well, that would be difficult but under certain circumstances would probably be acceptable, as long as the time we DID spend together was really great. But I am okay with someone who is inexperienced. In fact, I probably wouldn't mind it much at all, as I'm sure he'd make up for it in his willingness to learn. It's all about effort with me, it's OK if a guy doesn't get things right at first as long as he tried and meant well. And well "loser" is a relative term. I'm the last person who oughta be calling anyone a loser, lol. If that's you in the photo, you're an attractive girl. Do you have an active social life? Do you think you have a hard time separating the good ones from the bad? Do you think you're a "loser"? 1
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 Whether or not the linked story "proves" that satisfying, fulfilling, healthy, nurturing, companionable relationships are hard for women to find, it's true. And it's deeply offensive to have this truth refuted by dozens of sad sack guys who insist that all women have it so easy just because there is always a guy willing to f*** us no matter who we are - while at the same time looking for sympathy. 5
xxoo Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 The campus wasn't evenly split 50-50. Once you subtract the very large number of nursing students (who tended to keep to their own end of campus) the college skewed mostly male. Basically, I saw more men sitting by themselves than I did women. There are other issues too involving the seen vs the unseen (for example I wasn't around the entire campus all day so there could conceivably be a different trend in other places at other times of the day). I'm just giving an example of what I observed. If you saw a hetero couple, you saw a paired man and a paired woman. Women tend to travel in numbers. I'm not surprised you saw less women sitting by themselves. That doesn't mean that single women aren't on campus.
silvermercy Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 I agree that the desirable men wanting to open their hearts to a woman will mostly have paired off by mid to late 20s (even if not yet married). The "good" news is, many of them end up as heart-broken divorced men in their 30s-40s I think I will be camping outside divorce lawyers offices from now on!
fortyninethousand322 Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 If you saw a hetero couple, you saw a paired man and a paired woman. Women tend to travel in numbers. I'm not surprised you saw less women sitting by themselves. That doesn't mean that single women aren't on campus. Right. That's what I figured out eventually. 1
fortyninethousand322 Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 Whether or not the linked story "proves" that satisfying, fulfilling, healthy, nurturing, companionable relationships are hard for women to find, it's true. And it's deeply offensive to have this truth refuted by dozens of sad sack guys who insist that all women have it so easy just because there is always a guy willing to f*** us no matter who we are - while at the same time looking for sympathy. Hey now, I'm a sad sack guy and I totally agree that women have it tough dating. Looking for a good guy is like looking for a needle in a stack of needles.
fortyninethousand322 Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 I agree that the desirable men wanting to open their hearts to a woman will mostly have paired off by mid to late 20s (even if not yet married). The "good" news is, many of them end up as heart-broken divorced men in their 30s-40s I think I will be camping outside divorce lawyers offices from now on! Looks like I need to get divorced...
xxoo Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 I think I will be camping outside divorce lawyers offices from now on! Get their numbers and call them up in about 2 years. 2
Phoe Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 If that's you in the photo, you're an attractive girl. Do you have an active social life? Do you think you have a hard time separating the good ones from the bad? Do you think you're a "loser"? My social life is decent, it was VERY active in college, I was in alot of clubs and extracurricular activities, in the years since my social life has died down a bit, but I still go out and do things with friends about once a week. I don't know if I'm good at separating out the good from the bad, my first two relationships were all wrong, and I definitely learned from those 2 what to look out for, but I haven't been in a relationship in 6 years, and last went on a date 2 years ago. The guy I went on that last date with was a very nice guy, but it just didn't work out and we parted ways as friends. Most people probably would consider me a "loser" although I think that's a silly word to use for it. I'm geeky, nerdy, dorky, slightly strange tastes I guess. I'd be much better off paired with a geeky guy if I had a choice... I always had crushes on my physics professors in college
RedRobin Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 Get their numbers and call them up in about 2 years. I've got one, maybe two of those on ice 1
ascendotum Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 They certainly can adopt where I live. Where can't single women adopt? I thought only couples can adopt in my country but not 100% sure. There is a long waiting list of couples wanting to adopt local children and I thought they get first priority from the govt. so I didn't think single women would get a look in. Just having a quick read, it seems they can adopt children from a handful of other countries though, but it take many yrs of red tape.
ascendotum Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 THIS... When the men here assume that a OK looking young female ought to have men constantly pursuing her and trying to date her, seeing myself literally have the most difficult time makes me wonder what the heck is wrong with me... it sucks, truth be told. But you would (going by your avatar) if you lived in a reasonable size metro area. Your situation is similar to the OPs in that where you live is a major factor in why you have it hard. So you could say..yes some pretty women have it hard because they live on farms or in retirement towns or are bio scientists working in the mountains, etc.
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