can i get my woman back?

[dnalop]

So I am having a very stressful start for the year. I have a 7 month old son, who is a blessing. His mother is an angel and is taking care of him amazingly.

We have been together for 4 years now, and we broke up when our son turned 3,months old. It was my fault, my head wasn't on track for a while. We were very close and both took care of him, but I started being distant, and even lied about where I was and what I was doing. No cheating involved, but I broke her trust. I even left all night with no explanation. She broke up with me because of all the stress I created, when we have a baby to look after. Through this time apart and all my sadness, I have learned a lot and have realized many of my faults.

I understand exactly why she left me. I should have been more focused on being close to them. I could have done many things differently. But the hard truth is, I can not take back what is already done, I can only work on my self and improve.

She has told me she wants to be a family, and all live together. Mistakes don't define who I am. I really want to have this beautiful girl forever. I want a family. She also tells me she is hurt by me and says I'm not the same as I used to be. But have been without her for 4 months, still trying to figure out how to show her I'm caring, here for her, and honest. I know I am because they are all I think about, I don't go a day without thinking about what could be. I guess what I want to know, is how do I show I'm different, if were apart? How do I get her to see my changes and my love if she won't be with me until I change? As of now she just tells me to leave her alone. And that she wishes our sons dad cared, and wanted a family. So difficult, thanks

[lloversrock]

First thanx for the post on my thread.It took 11 months of not much much contact for him to remember all the good things about me.He said when he brokeup with me he was mad at me.

Just give her time to get over the hurt so she can remember how you were before,since you know what went wrong wait until she's ready (over the hurt) then she will be open to seeing the changes in you and trusting you again,try not to feel bad about it. You have a beautiful child together you will get a chance to show her when she open to it. People say people don't change,but they can if they wont to. Maybe she want to be sure that you really mean it. Its hard to change overnight but over weeks and months they can. They may believe you after extended period of time more than a shorter period. Try to keep you spirit high so you can be able to do what you need to do.

 

If you need to post again,maybe just for support. Im all ears.I hope my post helps you in some way maybe feel alil better:)

[dnalop]

Thank you for the response! I hope we will be together again. She is still upset and were apart but says she always wanted to be with me.. So I don't know if I should be persistent or not contact her. I contact her because I need to see my son, I don't know what the right thing to say or do is.

[WIDESTI]

WOW your situation is so similar to mine!

 

My fiance (23) and I (26) have been together for 2.5 years. We knew each other in high school but dated and she got pregnant after 2 months. Things definitely changed. She changed to be a great mother and all for our son but I slowly made my changes. I kept going to the gym, playing ball and lost her trust by keeping in touch to people she didnt like for advice though she told me to stop a few times and we also have a lot of little stupid arguments which we end up making a big deal of. Never cheated or thought about cheating, as I want to marry this girl. I kept telling her I can change and I don't have to talk to people and be more open with her. I think the mistakes we are making are things that are easily changeable.

 

Last few weeks we have been "broken up", she tells me daily to leave her alone. I see her everyday because of my son and we talk and converse but if I mention anything about us and our relationship she gets annoyed. My advice is just like above, give her her space. Hard lesson I have gone through with previous relationships. Your emotions are strong and will take over and YOU WILL want to do things sporadically. As of now she still doesn't want to be together so I need to learn to let her be and hopefully she will come around. Like you, I want my family together, I even bought a house, we talked about decorating and moving and about to close escrow and now this.

 

I wish you the very best and I hope things work out between you two, and unfortunately know that there's other people out there who feel your pain. You sound like a great father, don't ever give that up but I know what you mean about have your family together.

[aMguilts]

she`s TOLD you to leave her alone

so i`m sorry but that is what you have to do

aM