tomtombu Posted February 22, 2013 Posted February 22, 2013 (edited) its a long one, but it's worth it. read away! so... i got dumped on new years eve (im the guy), loadssssssss of drama with this girl... but i loved her so i was prepared to go on with it. we were together almost a year. im 24 shes 21 Detail with me and ex-gf: she kept lying to me, kept treating me like ****, i tried to breakup with her more than several times during the relationship because i was becoming unhappy, and i was becoming increasingly insecure and untrustworthy of her, but i couldnt do it because each time she kept crying and saying she would change, so i accepted, and every time this happen my love would come back even more stronger. rinse and repeat more than several times. Detail with me and my ex-best friend: he is very immature, cheated on his ex-gf, lied to her daily, told me to lie to her aswell (which i did because he was my best friend, i hated doing it), throws his toys out the pram when found out lying. In a nutshell: my ex-gf had a bf (exex-bf - he was very nasty, i witnessed many times where he would treat he like ****). she sexted my best friend (whilst still with exex-bf). her exex-bf found out. he tried to make it work. she didnt want it to work. she dumped him. then my ex-bestfriend and her fall out. she came onto me. we decided to go out. best friend looked through keyhole whilst my ex-gf was in the shower. my ex saw. my ex told me 3 months AFTER it happen. i tell him to **** off (no longer a friend at all, i felt betrayed, and was annoyed she didn't tell me til 3 months later). she doesn't speak to him. he gets back in contact again 3 months later to my ex-gf (he liked her throughout all this drama). talks dirty to my ex-gf until we broke up (about 3 months). about a month and a bit before it ended, she told me that if we argued again, she would dump me... i accepted, (yeah, i know, i became door matt material) she actually said that to me, so for a whole month i kept my mouth closed, until i had enough. i told her to tell him to piss off, she said she would, but never did, then said stuff like 'oh my' and other stuff to egg him on, then i said you have to say something. she agreed she would. i randomly asked her one day if she had spoke to him. argument erupted. dumped over the phone, i was in tears, she was normal, no emotion what-so-ever... :S. now im ex-bf. Broke NC after a week to see how things were, and i was very sad and wanted to hear her voice, she said she didn't want to be in a relationship with anyone, she wanted to remain single, i said i was sorry for the whole thing, crying my eye's out, you know the drill... all that stupid stuff. Nc for a month after that, i e-mail her telling her how i felt during our relationship. hurt, unhappy, all the lies were getting me down and REALLY insecure and paranoid. etc... No response, so at this point i was 90% over her, because I kept thinking of all the times she treated me like ****, and lied to me etc. It really helped the healing process. So i txt her 2 weeks after i sent that email to see if she wanted to catch up, she replied back saying that she didnt want to talk to me for ages, because the email i sent her made her 'feel like ****', but i was just saying how i had been feeling during our relationship. so i sent her a txt apologizing for making her feel like ****, i just wanted to get myself heard. So... now for the crazy thing that recently happen... I was looking around on yahoo answers recently... with relationship advice, and i click on a random thread that looked interesting, and it was my EX-GF!!!... i mean, wtf!? coincidence? fate? no idea... but it was 5 days old. and my heart skipped like a million beats, as i was stunned. i took a screeny xD she asked a question on there, and she said that i was a rebound from exex-bf, that i was a 'manipulative prick', and that she is seeing my ex-best friend, and that she has had feelings for him for OVER A YEAR! so WHILST we were together... (reading that made me sick), but wants to take it slow with him, because we got together too fast... and i knew this, and i repeatedly asked her before and even after we went out if i was a rebound, to which she said no, so i didnt have sex with her for 2 months because i didnt want things rushed, she would try and pressure me into it loads, but i wasnt budging... then when it felt right we did it... so anyway, yeah, the one that looked through the keyhole at her, and was chatting her up weekly, to which she never told him to stop. so.. i send her a cheeky text saying that i found her question on yahoo answers and basically said that i couldnt believe that i was a rebound, and i REALLY couldn't believe that she said i was a manipulative prick, as i honestly wasn't at all! she tried to make it seem as if she wanted to get the answers she wanted to hear. i wasn't going to text her, but the manipulative prick thing really wound me up and i couldn't help myself. so about 15 mins later i refresh the page and she deleted it... so i sent her another cheeky txt and basically said that 'you two are perfect for each other, both liars, cheats, and immature, i regret the entire relationship, i couldn't believe i just accepted being a doormatt, (i was love-blind) good luck you will need it'. had no response, which is how it will stay i guess. Conclusion now... part of me is extremely hurt to find out that i was a rebound, because i assume that i meant nothing to her, and she was just using me until something 'better' come along... which happen to be my ex-bestfriend... the other part of me finds it absolutely hilarious. but, another part of me really hates her, for lying her ****ing ass off, only giving 1 sided- false stories and treating me like a piece of turd... we have a lot of mutual friends, and the way she is she likes to tell anybody and everybody about everything, so i dont want to be mis-judged because of her lies... i havn't spoke to any of them properly since, but we still all have small talk about stuff, just nothing about my ex-gf. what do you guys think about this whole crazy situation? is it normal for me to hate her? Edited February 22, 2013 by tomtombu
BarbecueMan666 Posted February 22, 2013 Posted February 22, 2013 Very normal for you to hate her right now. She sounds very lost. Saying she'll dump you the next time you guys have an argument - well that was just proving how much control she had, and how little she cared. While you're very angry now, I doubt many peoples exes have super pleasant things to say about them directly after the relationship, so don't worry too much about the manipulative prick comment - My ex told my friends I was frugal and yada yada, I was anything but. Not sure what else to say, you don't want someone like that in your life, so I'm actually pretty happy for you ^^. 1
Kengne Posted February 22, 2013 Posted February 22, 2013 (edited) Tomtombu I don't know if you realize this - but Karma is a bytch. You dated your ex-bestfriend's ex-gf, after they had broken up - the same girl HE met, while she was still f*cking with HER ex-ex-bf - and now, she has left you, to go back to your ex-bestfriend - and you are hurt/angry/upset/surprised that she lied to you and viewed you as the rebound? You weren't just the rebound - you were the rebound, of the rebound. Sloppy. The whole situation is just sloppy. When you play around in the mud, do not expect to come out sparkling white - because at some point - your hands will get dirty. I am shocked & confused as to why you would believe a liar and a cheater. So you waited 2 months to have sex (claps!) - great but did you forget she lied to your ex bestfriend & lied to her ex ex bf? Clearly, she doesn't feel she owes anyone anything, esp not The Truth. I can understand that you "hate" her - but really, you should be taking a look at yourself to see what you did wrong in this situation and how you can learn/grow from it. Maybe, if you had not been messing around with your ex-best friend's sloppy seconds - you would be in a different place right now. I'm not saying this to be mean/hurtful - just stating facts. When you put out crazy shyt to the Universe, it responds - 2, 4 or 10 fold. And as long as you keep making the same mistakes - the Universe will keep presenting the same opportunities for you to learn - over & over - but each time the consequences will be graver. This time - it's just a broken heart, and 1 yr out of your life. You're 24, you will get over her and move on to the next chick. Hopefully - not another close friend's ex chick. There are too many wonderful women out there to be creeping in your friends' backyard. YOU CAN DO BETTER. K. PS> i think it might be a good look for you to stop sending her psycho-like text messages. that will just turn her off even more. don't be "That Crazy A$$ Dude". Edited February 22, 2013 by Kengne
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