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How people see things they say about their EX after a break up

marklarsson

By marklarsson
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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marklarsson Established Member

marklarsson

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A colleage of mine was telling me a story today of how he let a friend of his who was going to have a meeting at the same work place as his ex a gift, one that was very thoughtful. that if he did see his ex he should give it to her. this was only less than 3weeks after the break up. however when the ex received it she phoned up my colleague and called him a stalker.

 

he was very shocked because he had been making a conscious effort to stay away from his ex, he was not there himself, he knew she worked there because that's where she worked when they were going out. he asked me and i said that his ex may have over reacted a bit and maybe have over dramatized the situation, because she was not threatened in anyway shape or form. nor did she have to feel unsafe. However that he should not do it again because she had already said he was a stalker if he does something like that again then he will be one.

 

what do you guys think of this story?

and also do you have any stories of false accusations has an ex has made about you

NoLeafClover Established Member

NoLeafClover

Posted
Posted (edited)
A colleage of mine was telling me a story today of how he let a friend of his who was going to have a meeting at the same work place as his ex a gift, one that was very thoughtful. that if he did see his ex he should give it to her. this was only less than 3weeks after the break up. however when the ex received it she phoned up my colleague and called him a stalker.

 

he was very shocked because he had been making a conscious effort to stay away from his ex, he was not there himself, he knew she worked there because that's where she worked when they were going out. he asked me and i said that his ex may have over reacted a bit and maybe have over dramatized the situation, because she was not threatened in anyway shape or form. nor did she have to feel unsafe. However that he should not do it again because she had already said he was a stalker if he does something like that again then he will be one.

 

what do you guys think of this story?

and also do you have any stories of false accusations has an ex has made about you

From personal experience , tell your friend to stay away from this type of girls period.

I had a friend who was dating a virgin/sheltered girl years ago which he ended up going to court for to fight against a stalking restraining order. - after 1 1/2 yrs relationship

It was a phone call and an apologetic email he sent her after he broke up with her that she was trying to use against him (No threats and just telling her how he felt)

 

It backfired on her end and the order was denied (i think she ended up paying fees to the court) but it was the worse thing ever to have anyone think you're a stalker, let alone your ex.

 

It's very sad that there are women out there that use the law on their behalf just to get back at their ex and get them in trouble by making false accusations and exaggeration.

 

Tell your friend to not contact her in anyway or next thing you know he might end up either being served with a court order or he might have people at his company think he is a stalker.

 

Please tell him to take this matter and her behaviour seriously because when sh*t hits the fan for no real reason, it will hit him real hard and noone is going to take his side.

Edited by NoLeafClover
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marklarsson Established Member

marklarsson

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From personal experience , tell your friend to stay away from this type of girls period.

I had a friend who was dating a virgin/sheltered girl years ago which he ended up going to court for to fight against a stalking restraining order. - after 1 1/2 yrs relationship

It was a phone call and an apologetic email he sent her after he broke up with her that she was trying to use against him (No threats and just telling her how he felt)

 

It backfired on her end and the order was denied (i think she ended up paying fees to the court) but it was the worse thing ever to have anyone think you're a stalker, let alone your ex.

 

It's very sad that there are women out there that use the law on their behalf just to get back at their ex and get them in trouble by making false accusations and exaggeration.

 

Tell your friend to not contact her in anyway or next thing you know he might end up either being served with a court order or he might have people at his company think he is a stalker.

 

Please tell him to take this matter and her behavior seriously because when sh*t hits the fan for no real reason, it will hit him real hard and noone is going to take his side.

 

Trust me i told him that the fact that she called him a stalker after he needs to realized he dodged a bullet. He told me that he has never during their relationship exhibited any signs of being a stalker. he has never turned up to where shes been unannounced, he has never kept tabs on her. so he was so shocked that she will even think he was a stalker.

I told him that if she kept the gift then she was definitely exaggerating and was saying that to clearly get a reaction.

 

the sad thing is he loves her dearly and he knows she will come back sometime down the lie with her tail between her legs. He has to follow his heart but i told him to really think twice about taking her back if he does.

Treasa Established Member

Treasa

Posted
Posted

I wouldn't like it if my ex sent me a present. When it's over, I want to be left alone, not given gifts.

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Amelie1980 Established Member

Amelie1980

Posted
Posted
I wouldn't like it if my ex sent me a present. When it's over, I want to be left alone, not given gifts.

 

Very true. Its confusing.

I was in a LDR years ago and I found out he was seeing someone else out there and keeping me on the back burner.

He was first love and harder for me to let go of. A few months later his mother turns up on my doorstep with a few birthday present. it was something very personal to us....one of our jokes. I took this to mean he might be reconsidering his decision to split and want ne back. turns out he thought of me when he saw it and thought id like it. that stuff really messes you up and sets back your recovery.

 

That guy deserved to be called a stalker ....the hurt that stuff causes is immeasurable.

flitzanu Established Member

flitzanu

Posted
Posted
A colleage of mine was telling me a story today of how he let a friend of his who was going to have a meeting at the same work place as his ex a gift, one that was very thoughtful. that if he did see his ex he should give it to her. this was only less than 3weeks after the break up. however when the ex received it she phoned up my colleague and called him a stalker.

 

he was very shocked because he had been making a conscious effort to stay away from his ex, he was not there himself, he knew she worked there because that's where she worked when they were going out. he asked me and i said that his ex may have over reacted a bit and maybe have over dramatized the situation, because she was not threatened in anyway shape or form. nor did she have to feel unsafe. However that he should not do it again because she had already said he was a stalker if he does something like that again then he will be one.

 

what do you guys think of this story?

and also do you have any stories of false accusations has an ex has made about you

 

 

so did you ex tell you during the breakup that she doesn't want to speak to you or contact you at all? because when they don't want to talk and you send them gifts that just makes you creepy. i'd be worried less about being called "a stalker" and more concerned with healing and not sending my ex gifts through third parties.

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marklarsson Established Member

marklarsson

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so did you ex tell you during the breakup that she doesn't want to speak to you or contact you at all? because when they don't want to talk and you send them gifts that just makes you creepy. i'd be worried less about being called "a stalker" and more concerned with healing and not sending my ex gifts through third parties.

 

His ex never told him to stay away. in fact She told him that they could talk and even see each other and stuff. which was what threw him off a bit when she started calling him a stalker after what he did

destroyed4sho Established Member

destroyed4sho

Posted
Posted
A colleage of mine was telling me a story today of how he let a friend of his who was going to have a meeting at the same work place as his ex a gift, one that was very thoughtful. that if he did see his ex he should give it to her. this was only less than 3weeks after the break up. however when the ex received it she phoned up my colleague and called him a stalker.

 

he was very shocked because he had been making a conscious effort to stay away from his ex, he was not there himself, he knew she worked there because that's where she worked when they were going out. he asked me and i said that his ex may have over reacted a bit and maybe have over dramatized the situation, because she was not threatened in anyway shape or form. nor did she have to feel unsafe. However that he should not do it again because she had already said he was a stalker if he does something like that again then he will be one.

 

what do you guys think of this story?

and also do you have any stories of false accusations has an ex has made about you

 

This girl sounds a little off or overreactive.

My ex told her friends I was cheating. I was not, never did and never even wanted to.

She called me all kinds of names one being "psycho" which she loved to use when I would try to talk about my feeling or resolve an issue. :-)

 

Her friends understandable did not like me and when they were around I felt awkward because I knew the things she told them. (she would tell me ofcourse) They also would not be that friendly towards me!

So, because I sensed tension and felt awkwardness in front of her friends, I guess that verified everything she was saying about me in their minds.... :-)

 

Talking bad about your partner is one of the worst things you can do. It is a certain no-fail way to kill a relationship.

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marklarsson Established Member

marklarsson

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This girl sounds a little off or overreactive.

My ex told her friends I was cheating. I was not, never did and never even wanted to.

She called me all kinds of names one being "psycho" which she loved to use when I would try to talk about my feeling or resolve an issue. :-)

 

Her friends understandable did not like me and when they were around I felt awkward because I knew the things she told them. (she would tell me ofcourse) They also would not be that friendly towards me!

So, because I sensed tension and felt awkwardness in front of her friends, I guess that verified everything she was saying about me in their minds.... :-)

 

Talking bad about your partner is one of the worst things you can do. It is a certain no-fail way to kill a relationship.

 

my colleague believes that at the time she was seeing someone else. so this gave her the confidence to say whatever she felt like saying to him because she didn't care anymore. and i agree she reacted in that way because of those reasons. for example think about the way people behave when they are cheating. if they are having an argument with their boyfriend they are more likely to say something like "ok im heading out" and slam the door behind them because they know that they are going to call the guy they are cheating with and just go over to his place.

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