Girlfriend split up from me 2 days ago, I can't cope, can we ever be mates? very long

[Ryan_B]

I'd been with her for 7 months. We are both 20 years old and she was my first. They were the best 7 months of my life and I love her, so much. But we have had a few big rows over the past few months and for a little while, I've been expecting this deep down, but it still came as a shock when she said it. She said that she has loved the last 7 months. Said I treated her like a princess, never treated her badly. She said I am a brilliant guy and that I deserve the very best. She just said that I'm not what she's looking for right now and that she couldn't have a future with me. I was heart broken, and still am. I've been crying, non-stop for the past 2 days. All of a sudden, I can only think of the good/brilliant times we had together, and it make me so hurt and upset at the thought of never having them again, I just break down. We had days out to theme parks, went out for drives 3/4 times a week, visited many places, had our favourite places where we would park up and chat and laugh. It all seemed so perfect. 3 weeks ago, we spent the night in a hotel together after spending a really lovely day together for our 6th month anniversary and last week, for valentines, I took her on holiday for the week. It was really special. But 3 days after getting home, she ends it. As I said, though, I didn't think she was overly happy so I kind of knew it was coming. But now, all I have done since then is cry. Thinking of all the times we had together. When we first met, our first date, times with our friends, days out, holidays, spending quality times together, cuddling her, I keep hearing her in my head, the things she used to say to me, how much she loved me, how she thought I was the one, they were the best things I'd ever been told. I now put my deodorant on, but she liked it, so I fall apart, put on a shirt, but she loved that shirt, I hear her favourite songs on the radio, I have to drive past her house occassionaly. Yesterday I had to go past one of the car parks we used to mess around in and have a laugh, I broke down in tears. I broke down at work yesterday aswell. I still have a load of her possesions in my room, which a friend has agreed to take to her at some point, I fall apart everytime I see them. I have ripped up all the love letters, christmas and valentines cards, gifts etc she got me, but that was very hard, as was deleting all photos of her.

She said however, that she still loves me as a friend. She said she wants to be friends with me, and go to all the places we used too, but as friends, in a group of us. I really don't want to lose her out of my life forever, the thought of that makes me want to die to be honest! But how can I be friends with such strong feelings and love towards her? Will them feelings die down, over time? If I think of the places we used to go, it brings up memories of us in happy times, together, will that stop eventually? Please say it will! I told her I will delete her on facebook and delete her number (we used to text all the time so that was very hard to do), but I will keep her on Skype as she is always on there. I said I will block her on there, but in the future, if my feelings, love, thoughts, memories etc do die down and I feel we can have a friendship, then that'll be brilliant, and I will make contact with her again. But is that possible? Will my love for her die down? Will I stop getting reminded of her whenever I do something? I have her face in my mind 24 hours of the day right now and can hear her saying the things she used too, 3/4 months ago. When will it end? Please help,I know it was only 7 months, but she was my first love. I'm not coping at all...