JennaMax Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 Do you really pay attention what the BBC says? Sounds to me like BS propaganda...there are "left over" women everywhere.
hppr Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 (edited) Women in their prime (18-29)...Once their good looks start to slip that's when their power diminishes. Most of the girls I knew in High School lost their looks before they were 25 and the jock guys who got all the girls didn't fare any better. In contrast the guys and girls who invested in themselves and their education were looking good and doing quite well. As you age the rules change and it becomes more about your character and what you have to offer rather than just looks, although looks still matter. Men always put more emphasis on looks than women do which is why there are all these articles about how women "aren't marketable" after X age...it's bull**** they can still find guys (and many do) they just have to work at it a bit more and be willing to compromise in the looks/status dept in exchange for other qualities, like good character, dependability, loyalty, things that really matter in a lasting relationship. I think a lot of women don't make that connection though which is why you meet so many "attractive" single 30somethings who rant about not being able to find guys, or how all guys just want sex/no relationship skills that kind of stuff. Edited February 21, 2013 by hppr 2
truth_seeker Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 As you age the rules change Exactly. For women who are used to having their way, they find it very hard to transition and accept.
sweetkiwi Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I was engaged at 20. And in a very intelligent move I did NOT get married. I do not plan on getting married till after I am 30 (if ever).
Els Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 Some of you people need a lesson (or two) about the actual situation in China that led to this, while you're busy crying your heart out about the girls picking the 'alpha' guys in your college. The reason for this article is not related to that at all - China's government could care less about whether the girls were choosing you or the jocks in college. They could care less about whether or not you were getting laid in college. The sole reason for this propaganda in Chinese media is because there is a critical shortage of women in China. This move is just made to shame any single women into pairing up and procreating (with the A-grade men, preferably!), because every unpaired woman makes the shortage worse. They've realized that their one child policy and inherent chauvinistic attitude has come back to bite them in the butt, and now they're desperately trying to combat the aftereffects. 8
Lonely Ronin Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I do not plan on getting married till after I am 30 (if ever). I'll never understand this mindset. What happened I'll get married when I find the right person. What is with the, I'll wait until I'm X years old to do Y, and I'm not going to do B until I'm A years old. Is this like a thing now, to try and plan your entire life out on a calendar? 3
FitChick Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 China needs more workers since so many are killing themselves.
Life'sGood Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 Whatever happen to live and enjoy life and see where it takes you? 2
todreaminblue Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 Not to make this into a political thread, but didn't President Obozo say we should emulate these pinkos a few years back? what is a pinko
StanMusial Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 what is a pinko A Communist. I am upper 30s and I've tried to date my age up until recently. IMO women over 30 are just difficult to deal with. The ones without baggage (much baggage I should say) price themselves out of the market and then gripe about not finding anyone. Many of them are really picky yet still "hook up" with losers because they are good looking. Its easier just to skip over these women and dip back into the mid 20s range.
Shardish Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 It looks like I'll be seeking a working visa for China.
TheBigQuestion Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 The hard truth is as women get older the tables get turned on them. Women in their prime (18-29) have the power. Above average to beautiful women can pick and choose, have boatloads of options at their disposal. Once their good looks start to slip that's when their power diminishes. They start to get over looked; all of those options are no longer available. Women have to cash in at the right time. If they don't, they're going to struggle to find someone as they get older. As for men, over the long haul, we have the advantage. Women may have more power and control for a small period of time, but men win in the longevity department. Of course, these men must be relatively good-looking and are financially secure. I don't really think men have any advantage in the long run unless they're unusually wealthy and do not mind cavorting with golddiggers. Men in their 30s, 40s and older will generally have the same group of single 30s, 40s, and older women available to them, many of whom are "damaged goods," i.e. divorcees or serial monogamists. Only those who stay in particularly good shape and who don't behave like lethargic middle-aged men will be able to consistently attract women who are significantly younger than they. 1
sillyanswer Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 Well that's the way it is in the world's biggest relationship market, China. Meanwhile, back in civilisation...
Drseussgrrl Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 A Communist. I am upper 30s and I've tried to date my age up until recently. IMO women over 30 are just difficult to deal with. The ones without baggage (much baggage I should say) price themselves out of the market and then gripe about not finding anyone. Many of them are really picky yet still "hook up" with losers because they are good looking. Its easier just to skip over these women and dip back into the mid 20s range. I've also found men over 30 harder to deal with. They aren't nearly as in shape, have as much hair, or as much energy as their younger counterparts. A lot of them also have crazy ex-wives or girlfriends, or still live with roommates. Many of them have kids from some ho they knocked up, and their money is tied up in child support or they have the kid a lot of the time. 3
Taramere Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 Some of you people need a lesson (or two) about the actual situation in China that led to this, while you're busy crying your heart out about the girls picking the 'alpha' guys in your college. The reason for this article is not related to that at all - China's government could care less about whether the girls were choosing you or the jocks in college. They could care less about whether or not you were getting laid in college. The sole reason for this propaganda in Chinese media is because there is a critical shortage of women in China. This move is just made to shame any single women into pairing up and procreating (with the A-grade men, preferably!), because every unpaired woman makes the shortage worse. They've realized that their one child policy and inherent chauvinistic attitude has come back to bite them in the butt, and now they're desperately trying to combat the aftereffects. I visited Hong Kong briefly back in the mid nineties and that was when I first started to think about that particular emerging problem. I was out for dinner with friends of the people I was staying with and the issue of how things would be once all these boys got old enough to marry and there weren't enough girls around came up. I think generally life is better for women in countries where there are more than enough women to "go around". The fewer women there are, the more women start to be seen as commodities...and you've got all the aggression that goes with frustrated men who want girlfriends & wives and can't get them. You can see how women who don't get married might provoke this outrage and efforts to shame and ridicule them out of singledom. The irony being that the same society that aims all that shaming and ridicule at them for not doing their bit to reduce the number of frustrated bachelors in China is responsible for the imbalanced numbers of men and women - thanks to sex selective abortion and outright murder of female babies. Some of the women who were permitted to make it past babyhood are probably left thinking that those who didn't may have been the lucky ones after all. 3
BetheButterfly Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I just turned 27 Don't worry. I was 33 when my husband and I met. I wish I had met him earlier, but I know he doesn't consider me a "leftover" but rather his Vida (Life in Spanish) and he's very picky!!! So, don't let numbers get you down. The right man won't see you with an expiration tag or "must marry by age ..." Rather, he will see you as the wonderful woman you are!!! 7
BetheButterfly Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I visited Hong Kong briefly back in the mid nineties and that was when I first started to think about that particular emerging problem. I was out for dinner with friends of the people I was staying with and the issue of how things would be once all these boys got old enough to marry and there weren't enough girls around came up. I think generally life is better for women in countries where there are more than enough women to "go around". The fewer women there are, the more women start to be seen as commodities...and you've got all the aggression that goes with frustrated men who want girlfriends & wives and can't get them. You can see how women who don't get married might provoke this outrage and efforts to shame and ridicule them out of singledom. The irony being that the same society that aims all that shaming and ridicule at them for not doing their bit to reduce the number of frustrated bachelors in China is responsible for the imbalanced numbers of men and women - thanks to sex selective abortion and outright murder of female babies. Some of the women who were permitted to make it past babyhood are probably left thinking that those who didn't may have been the lucky ones after all. That is really sad China's human rights issues are still very serious, yeah?
sweetkiwi Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I'll never understand this mindset. What happened I'll get married when I find the right person. What is with the, I'll wait until I'm X years old to do Y, and I'm not going to do B until I'm A years old. Is this like a thing now, to try and plan your entire life out on a calendar? Yes. I will get married at exactly 30 years, 5 months, 3 days, and 22 hours old. I am single. I am not seriously dating anyone. I will soon be 26. And I don't plan on being with someone for a year or two and getting married without fully knowing them or how we are together in a living situation for a few years. This isn't that hard Rolin. It makes complete sense.
StanMusial Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I've also found men over 30 harder to deal with. They aren't nearly as in shape, have as much hair, or as much energy as their younger counterparts. A lot of them also have crazy ex-wives or girlfriends, or still live with roommates. Many of them have kids from some ho they knocked up, and their money is tied up in child support or they have the kid a lot of the time. I don't have any of those problems, except for less energy. I am definitely looking more for a serious relationship now as opposed to when I was in my 20's.
crude Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 Some of the women who were permitted to make it past babyhood are probably left thinking that those who didn't may have been the lucky ones after all. I see plenty of happy, well balanced single women who are thrilled to be alive and thriving, and don't need or want to be married. I'm sure it's the same for many Chinese women.
Treasa Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I don't have any of those problems, except for less energy. I think this is why older people are usually much wiser. We're too tired to give a crap about the insignificant **** anymore. 2
StanMusial Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I think this is why older people are usually much wiser. We're too tired to give a crap about the insignificant **** anymore. Well, I can say for certain that I am more likely now than ever to put my energy into more productive pursuits...
Seductive Posted February 22, 2013 Posted February 22, 2013 Well that's the way it is in the world's biggest relationship market, China. BBC News - China's 'leftover women' One consolation is if you are an older unmarried woman, you are considered higher quality...too good for most men, even though there are millions of excess men. Its not just the family who puts pressure on women to marry over there, the govt gets in on the act. Local govt. gets involved in trying to match up single people. If they really want to help all the dorky 'nice' guys or country farmers there, and have these educated women breed, then they should make it so that if the guy writes to his local state party chief, then they can force any single woman over 30 of his choosing to marry him. This isn't shocking to me, because my culture is the same. I just shrug my shoulders and do what I want. The American law doesn't condone forced marriages.
Eggplant Posted February 22, 2013 Posted February 22, 2013 I'm guessing the Chinese men on average marry earlier too because of cultural and family pressure. So they marry young women of the same age. Also the girls there can take their pick, as there is a lop-sided gender ratio. Plenty of single women in the U.S. who are 27+ would be married if they were Chinese. Also, in the U.S., there are more single older men for the older women to date because men wait longer to commit and also because of divorces. Many men may prefer younger 20ish women, but there are only so many of those to go around.
Disenchantedly Yours Posted February 22, 2013 Posted February 22, 2013 Isn't it always interesting how many threads and comments pop up from men on this website about how worthless women are when they fail to become a man's love-slave at 18? Yet, there are not as many, if any, threads started by women about how men are all worthless if they don't make x-amount of dollars. Oh LS *some* men..and you think your "winning", when you're really just hurting yourselves. ......Has anyone else noticed that Chinese food is always better on the second day? 2
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