Drseussgrrl Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Anyone had an experience like this? You met your sig other and within days, you just "knew"?
todreaminblue Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Anyone had an experience like this? You met your sig other and within days, you just "knew"? i think it can happen ....feeling an affinity for someone is a good sign......i still think you need to tread with careful feet and get to know the person......even if you do feel a strong attraction...exploring that can be fun...if that affinity is there..deb 1
tman666 Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Anyone had an experience like this? You met your sig other and within days, you just "knew"? Well, I'm of the opinion that it's a little presumptuous to say that you just "knew" they were "the one" (I'm assuming that's what you're referring to), since I believe anything can happen in life and relationships. That said, my fiancee and I both knew that there was something different and special about what was going on after the first few hours of speaking with each other. It wasn't like we immediately both thought "this is the person I want to spend the rest of my life with", but there was definitely this strange feeling that we had known each other for years, despite having just met for the first time. 12
miss_jaclynrae Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Anyone had an experience like this? You met your sig other and within days, you just "knew"? I knew the moment I saw mine. It was an intense feeling, I was in a relationship at the time too. I saw him in line at a Starbucks and instantly felt this connection and draw to him. He said it was exactly the same for him too. It was like being in a movie only better! He came up to me finally, [after totally trying to work up the courage for 15 minutes or so] asked me if I was waiting for anyone, and when I said no, told me we should get coffee together. We had a quick chat and I gave him my number, that night I ended things with my boyfriend and he actually ended up calling me that night. We have been inseparable ever since, and yeah some people may say it hasn't been long. [4 months on the first!] We also have spent almost every night together [seriously, we have only spent 3 nights apart, and all on the holidays] since and things couldn't be more amazing. He is my everything, and I can't even explain to people what it has been like... just bliss. He is my best friend, my everything, he is inspiring and keeps me grounded. We are rarely apart and some may say it is unhealthy but we are just too damn crazy about eachother. 4
veggirl Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 mmmm when I met my bf for the first time my heart like dropped. I was digging him. Was that love...doubt it...I've felt that way about every guy I've seriously dated. It's just instant attraction. It took much longer than that to fall in love and know we are a great match. 2
candie13 Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 what you "know" is that there's a lot of sexual attraction. not necessarily that he is the one or that you are compatible. Keep your eyes extra open, it's when you think "you know", that you tend to feel safe (without necessarily having sound basis to) and trust. careful, girl, slippery road ahead! 8
todreaminblue Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 I knew the moment I saw mine. It was an intense feeling, I was in a relationship at the time too. I saw him in line at a Starbucks and instantly felt this connection and draw to him. He said it was exactly the same for him too. It was like being in a movie only better! He came up to me finally, [after totally trying to work up the courage for 15 minutes or so] asked me if I was waiting for anyone, and when I said no, told me we should get coffee together. We had a quick chat and I gave him my number, that night I ended things with my boyfriend and he actually ended up calling me that night. We have been inseparable ever since, and yeah some people may say it hasn't been long. [4 months on the first!] We also have spent almost every night together [seriously, we have only spent 3 nights apart, and all on the holidays] since and things couldn't be more amazing. He is my everything, and I can't even explain to people what it has been like... just bliss. He is my best friend, my everything, he is inspiring and keeps me grounded. We are rarely apart and some may say it is unhealthy but we are just too damn crazy about eachother. feel all fuzzy smiley at your lovely story...thanks for posting....deb
Author Drseussgrrl Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 what you "know" is that there's a lot of sexual attraction. not necessarily that he is the one or that you are compatible. Keep your eyes extra open, it's when you think "you know", that you tend to feel safe (without necessarily having sound basis to) and trust. careful, girl, slippery road ahead! LOL thanks. I'm not necessarily talking about myself. But I have had a lot of friends recently get engaged in about 6 months and it just seems to be the way it happens when you "know". Also, these are all folks who had either been engaged/married before, too, so they're not exactly naive or young. Interesting stuff.
miss_jaclynrae Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 I think it is WAY more than sexual attraction btw, sexual attraction doesn't explain the ability to talk for hours in bed every night about everything and anything, or easily working out the kinks in living with each other, I am a firm believer in certain people just "working" without much effort. It has been what I have yearned for and it truly is everything I have hoped for. Sure we get annoyed at one another, but we handle it so well. He tells me hes going to smack a hoe and I tell him to go be a grumpy old man on the couch. There are times when we **** up to, like the time I volunteered us to babysit my 8 week old nephew, and the time when he told me my dress made my pot belly look bigger without me even asking. Hahah we have learned how to handle eachother hurt feelings, and always try to see things from the other persons eyes. It may take a few hours for us to get to that point but we have never spend an entire day upset. We are really easygoing people and generally dislike fighting, we avoid it. It happens though! Even on huge things like marriage and kids and timelines we are perfectly aligned. All this and we are almost 10 years apart. It's nothing short of a miracle what I have found and I don't plan on wasting it. I may not have known right away all of those little things, but that connection and immediate draw was far more than his looks, [he is an old graying bald guy for crying out loud! ] it was just something else... something amazing. 4
tman666 Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 LOL thanks. I'm not necessarily talking about myself. But I have had a lot of friends recently get engaged in about 6 months and it just seems to be the way it happens when you "know". Also, these are all folks who had either been engaged/married before, too, so they're not exactly naive or young. Interesting stuff. As in, getting engaged after knowing each other for 6 months?? Whoa... I mean, maybe that's worked out fine for some, but I don't see how one can possibly know a person well enough after 6 months to be even reasonably sure that they want to spend the rest of their life with them. I think some people these days forget that whole "til death do us part" aspect of marriage... It's like some do it because it's "trendy". 6
Author Drseussgrrl Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 As in, getting engaged after knowing each other for 6 months?? Whoa... I mean, maybe that's worked out fine for some, but I don't see how one can possibly know a person well enough after 6 months to be even reasonably sure that they want to spend the rest of their life with them. I think some people these days forget that whole "til death do us part" aspect of marriage... It's like some do it because it's "trendy". Yep. One of my best girlfriends met her dude (he was divorced) and they were engaged six months later. They are about to have their first baby. I waited over 3 years for my ex to give me a ring and we were engaged for nearly a year when he broke things off for someone else. He was engaged to her within 8 months and they have a baby now and planning their wedding (I used to be very hurt by this but now don't give a rip lol). Another dude I knew (also divorced) met his wife and got MARRIED within TWO MONTHS. They have been together now for over 5 years and have a young son - going strong. Some people just work together and I used to think it was insane too - but honestly these are the couples who seem to be the happiest. Their hearts said 'yes' and they just went for it. 3
todreaminblue Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 As in, getting engaged after knowing each other for 6 months?? Whoa... I mean, maybe that's worked out fine for some, but I don't see how one can possibly know a person well enough after 6 months to be even reasonably sure that they want to spend the rest of their life with them. I think some people these days forget that whole "til death do us part" aspect of marriage... It's like some do it because it's "trendy". 6 months is basically the honeymoon period everythign is new ......at least a year of exclusive relationship.....where both feel comfortable at least.......and settled... 1
miss_jaclynrae Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 As in, getting engaged after knowing each other for 6 months?? Whoa... I mean, maybe that's worked out fine for some, but I don't see how one can possibly know a person well enough after 6 months to be even reasonably sure that they want to spend the rest of their life with them. I think some people these days forget that whole "til death do us part" aspect of marriage... It's like some do it because it's "trendy". I have been married before and therefore I am in no rush this time around to get married. I do think 6 months is too soon, but to each their own! I got married after 1 year [almost, more like 11 months with some change] and my marriage lasted longer than some women who married men who they had been with for years. I fully believe that you shouldn't compare your relationship to others, you never truly know how things are going. My marriage did end eventually though too, and when things were bad and horrible I was very hush about it... I would just be supportive of your friends and don't get down! Someone is out there for you! I knew the feeling though, especially once all my friends started making babies and buying houses and we were a LONG way from there... it is hard, but then again, I am SO glad we never did any of those things! Maybe now that I have been through marriage I find it over rated... I care more about the person I am with rather than the label... even though I admit if he was to propose I wouldn't hesitate to say yes. 1
Author Drseussgrrl Posted February 21, 2013 Author Posted February 21, 2013 I have been married before and therefore I am in no rush this time around to get married. I do think 6 months is too soon, but to each their own! I got married after 1 year [almost, more like 11 months with some change] and my marriage lasted longer than some women who married men who they had been with for years. I fully believe that you shouldn't compare your relationship to others, you never truly know how things are going. My marriage did end eventually though too, and when things were bad and horrible I was very hush about it... I would just be supportive of your friends and don't get down! Someone is out there for you! I knew the feeling though, especially once all my friends started making babies and buying houses and we were a LONG way from there... it is hard, but then again, I am SO glad we never did any of those things! Maybe now that I have been through marriage I find it over rated... I care more about the person I am with rather than the label... even though I admit if he was to propose I wouldn't hesitate to say yes. You had what a lot of us like to call a 'starter marriage'. Marry way too young, have it fall apart and learn the hard way. LOL 1
MidwestUSA Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I knew, about three hours into our first date. He did too. I guess it happens, just never thought it would happen to me! 2
candie13 Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 pffffff, unbelievable! My parents got married after 3 months (or dad proposed after 3 months and they got married the next month). I mean like, please !!! After 33 years, they still occasionally fight like there is no tomorrow - I honestly don't understand how they stayed married for all this time. But the more relationships I've had, the more I understood their dedication and hard work to make their marriage function. They must love each other very much, to put in all that effort, for so long! But I generally agree, it makes more sense to know a person first and to not have to make all those crazy efforts to keep that relationship alive.
Ruby Slippers Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 I do think that when it's an excellent match, you figure that out really fast. That's why these days I'm much quicker to move on if it's not working. If something really special hasn't unfolded within a month or two, it's most likely just not gonna happen. 2
candie13 Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 excellent match is a bit much, no? amazing attraction, fantastic chemistry, maybe... "excellent match" needs a lot more work and time to test it!
todreaminblue Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 you knwo i think it depends on the people involved thinking about it and honesty and hwo committed they are to the sanctity of marriage whther they get married early or late.....if th h onesty and commitment is there it would work....as a theory....i havent tested it.....i am waiting for an honest partner
Weezy1973 Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 My second GF I felt like "I knew" within the first few hours, but that was purely sexual attraction. We broke up a year and a half later. I think we can know if we connect with someone pretty quickly though - generally the conversation is VERY easy and you share some similar values and interests. It doesn't necessarily mean it would work in a long term relationship. What if they're a terrible kisser? What if they like rap?
todreaminblue Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 My second GF I felt like "I knew" within the first few hours, but that was purely sexual attraction. We broke up a year and a half later. I think we can know if we connect with someone pretty quickly though - generally the conversation is VERY easy and you share some similar values and interests. It doesn't necessarily mean it would work in a long term relationship. What if they're a terrible kisser? What if they like rap? lol rap is kool...just for cats and way to kool for school its like cat in the hat all the time, a way to be cool and rhyme that to me sounds fine....kissing can be taught, its not a breakup reason....sounds like treason...... to me kissing can be taught for free,.you have to let them see, how it ought to be...deb 4
Eternal Sunshine Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 My dad proposed to my mum after 3 months of dating (he was only 21). Their eyes met while fishing (they say they both "knew") and she approached him They have now been married for 35 years 4
KraftDinner Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 My parents knew each other for 3 months before they got married and it'll be 41 years this year. And my dad had the nerve to ask me if I was rushing into things with my bf (we've been together a year and are not yet engaged as he's saving for a ring, but we're planning on getting married next year)! I was talking to him on the phone and he said he and my mom knew each other a couple years before they got married and I heard my mom yelling in the background, "three months!" Ok, that last part was kind of off topic. 4
ScreamingTrees Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 Skeptical 'till I see it. I know older couples personally - family friends and whatnot, who ended up marrying quick and if they're not miserably dragging things out for the sake of a baby or whatever the case is, they're getting or have already gotten divorced. It's just very good luck if things work out that way, I say.. **** has to go right every once in awhile.. At least once in a lifetime.
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 21, 2013 Posted February 21, 2013 Anyone had an experience like this? You met your sig other and within days, you just "knew"? I knew even before I met him face to face. Of course, I waited for a while to get to know him, to make sure my precipitous feelings were right. They were. 2
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