pteromom Posted February 22, 2013 Posted February 22, 2013 When we first started dating he was madly in love with me. Did whatever I wanted. If he knew I was upset about something,forget about it, I had him in the palm of my hand. See my prior post. These kind of guys suck you in. They are SOOO sweet and passionate and loving and kind and giving. UNTIL you are on the hook. Did you read what I posted about reality 1/reality 2 type people? Reality 1 people are all about WINNING. They are sweet at first, because that's how they WIN you. Once they know you are in, they start making sure you STAY in. They do that by knocking down your self-esteem and playing these mind games to keep you confused and guessing. The times he is sweet to you aren't even about LOVE. If you think about it, you'll notice that the times he is sweet are when: - you are "in line" and not arguing with him - he is getting something out of the "sweetness" too (sex, fun, etc.) You'll notice that he is never sweet and kind to you in a selfless way. When is the last time he did something for you he did not also want? When is the last time he let you win an argument? By focusing on the possibility that he may still love his ex, you are focusing on the wrong things. You need to figure out what you are getting out of this relationship and whether it will EVER meet your needs. Because he is who he is. He isn't going to have some kind of magical epiphany where he decides you are right.
RedHead33 Posted February 24, 2013 Posted February 24, 2013 I don't understand you two live together see each other every day and have to schedule the time to talk about it. It's important to you and everything you said to us in the post say it to him. Today, now! If he wants marriage it wouldn't matter talking about it today or next week. After so many years together you should know what his future plans are and do you want to settle for common law relationship.
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