starla33 Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 so i posted on here before about this guy i was casually seeing. That i broke it off with because I want a relationship....he didn't. Anyway week after i broke it off and clearly stated I'm not seeing him anymore and we can't be friends. he starts contacting me with really friendly messages. WHAT on earth is he thinking? I swear I was super clear! (they were NOT sexual at all...which is what usually happens down the line with guys when they try for a booty call)
Bito Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 1. Either he wants an ego boost to see if he can still "have you" 2. He feels bad for rejecting you and wants to absolve his guilt Either way just ignore him.
Author starla33 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 1. Either he wants an ego boost to see if he can still "have you" 2. He feels bad for rejecting you and wants to absolve his guilt Either way just ignore him. Um he didn't reject me...I knew he didn't want a relationship from the start. I ended it. So who is rejected? I really don't get WHY he would want to even try to be friends with me after I said NO in person
Bito Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Um he didn't reject me...I knew he didn't want a relationship from the start. I ended it. So who is rejected? I really don't get WHY he would want to even try to be friends with me after I said NO in person You condriticte yourself. If you knew from the start he didn't want anything more then friendship then why all the drama?
Author starla33 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 You condriticte yourself. If you knew from the start he didn't want anything more then friendship then why all the drama? Look i was in a different place...and now I want one so I left. Does it really matter? I LEFT is the point I am making. This doesn't exactly explain his actions.
Bito Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Look i was in a different place...and now I want one so I left. Does it really matter? I LEFT is the point I am making. This doesn't exactly explain his actions. If you can hardly explain your own actions why do you care so much to explain his actions? Sometimes takeing a step back from your emotion will help you gain perspective on the situation. People do silly things I am not trying to antagonize you and I am sorry if you are hurting. Hugs
Author starla33 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 If you can hardly explain your own actions why do you care so much to explain his actions? Sometimes takeing a step back from your emotion will help you gain perspective on the situation. People do silly things I am not trying to antagonize you and I am sorry if you are hurting. Hugs Thanks. I honestly was not going to talk to him again and didn't expect that at all because I made it crystal clear I never want to see him again and told him what I want and left..........so it pisses me off that he contacted me because it took a lot for me to finally do that and end it!
Bito Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Thanks. I honestly was not going to talk to him again and didn't expect that at all because I made it crystal clear I never want to see him again and told him what I want and left..........so it pisses me off that he contacted me because it took a lot for me to finally do that and end it! Ignore him for now. If he persists remind him that you wish to be left alone.
gaius Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 You're so into him that you can't be around him as just friends. For a guy that's an ego boost on the level of getting a brand new expensive car. He's gonna do anything he can to try and keep you around. He's probably aiming for exactly what's going on now. You wondering if his messages mean you have a chance and reestablishing contact to find out.
Author starla33 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 You're so into him that you can't be around him as just friends. For a guy that's an ego boost on the level of getting a brand new expensive car. He's gonna do anything he can to try and keep you around. He's probably aiming for exactly what's going on now. You wondering if his messages mean you have a chance and reestablishing contact to find out. Well I"m not friends with people I have sex with ever and him and I had some amazing chemistry there. So it's really not that big a deal. That is the main reason though. Been there done that, didn't work so DON'T need you in my life. Me wondering if I can see him again? WHY on earth would i do that exactly? Makes no sense.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 So if you direct all this energy that revolves around him onto the next guy who does want a relationship, wouldn't you be happier? Leave it to the PhD's to figure out why a specific gender acts the way he does while you go on your merry way to finding an awesome relationship. Remember, your mailbox and messages inboxes come with a spam option and block function. Use it to your advantage. 3
Author starla33 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 So if you direct all this energy that revolves around him onto the next guy who does want a relationship, wouldn't you be happier? Leave it to the PhD's to figure out why a specific gender acts the way he does while you go on your merry way to finding an awesome relationship. Remember, your mailbox and messages inboxes come with a spam option and block function. Use it to your advantage. Well it was a text....and can't really block that out
xxoo Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 He likes your attention, and knows how to get it (best chance, anyway....he knows that a sexual text would be ignored, but friendly has a better chance of a response) Doesn't mean he wants to be a boyfriend.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Well it was a text....and can't really block that out Check with your carrier. They always have an option to unwanted incoming calls to voicemail or unwanted text messages blocked. Or if you really, really don't care, you can just ignore his messages. The simplest way is to just delete.
Author starla33 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 Check with your carrier. They always have an option to unwanted incoming calls to voicemail or unwanted text messages blocked. Or if you really, really don't care, you can just ignore his messages. The simplest way is to just delete. yeah honestly though hes not a bad person we are just not looking for the same thing so i don't know why he would be hitting me up for friendship
Eternal Sunshine Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 His other options are not paning out at the moment.
Author starla33 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 His other options are not paning out at the moment. seeing as how i was finding another girls hair...seemed like they were panning out pretty well
apple OR orange Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 sounds like the first time this has happened to him denial
sillyanswer Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 yeah honestly though hes not a bad person we are just not looking for the same thing so i don't know why he would be hitting me up for friendship He likes you?
Eddie Edirol Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 yeah honestly though hes not a bad person we are just not looking for the same thing so i don't know why he would be hitting me up for friendship He's trying to plant the seed for a future booty call, trying the non threatening way. Ignore him. He doesnt want friendship.
Author starla33 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Posted February 20, 2013 He's trying to plant the seed for a future booty call, trying the non threatening way. Ignore him. He doesnt want friendship. Honestly I'd feel better if it was a booty call. The fact that he would even try to be just friends so soon after I cut it off would make me feel pretty crappy. LIKE what you can hang out with me without having sex when we were so crazy all over eachother the whole time?
candie13 Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 he's not stupid. No guy will ever be straight up with you and say: hey, it didn't work out between us... but how about some sex? it'll never work. you had chemistry - ego boost, you had sex - ego boost, you obviously developed feelings - ego boost and then took your toys and left. He knows you're holding a torch. At best, he's only after another ego boost (because he knows you've got the hots for him). At worst, he's trying to manipulate you into being friends, feeding that chemistry and getting some more sex . Either way, he wins. What are you getting out of this? A bit of an ego boost as well, because he's calling. Just keep in mind that... he's after something. So smile, feel good about those "friendly" messages and that he initiated contact... and delete his number, girl! He's trouble. 1
Emilia Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Honestly I'd feel better if it was a booty call. The fact that he would even try to be just friends so soon after I cut it off would make me feel pretty crappy. LIKE what you can hang out with me without having sex when we were so crazy all over eachother the whole time? Stop wondering and cut him off. You need to practice how to shut people out of your life that are not good for you. Start with this one. 3
pbjbear Posted February 20, 2013 Posted February 20, 2013 Oh my god I am so sick of these threads. Message to women: start being smart and stop being emotionally weak. Really starla I think you know what hes trying to do... Most men on this earth are selfish. Its a fact. If hes a guy under the age of 27 multiply that by 100 Just because he doesnt want a relationship and you do doesnt mean hes not still going to try to get what he wants
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