ria_smiles16 Posted February 18, 2013 Posted February 18, 2013 Hello all, thanks ahead of time for taking the time to read this. Just a few days ago I found out that my ex of nearly four years started dating a new girl. We broke up about 9 months ago but even after we did we still acted as a couple and we still shared moments of intimacy together up until end of December. My birthday was coming up and he had told me he wanted to take me out on a date for my 20th birthday and I thought this was a sign of good things to come. I was wrong. A few days before my birthday he just didn't talk to me, and didn't tell me whether or not we were still doing anything. What's sad is that his mother actually planned a party for me and he didn't even attend. The only thing I got from him was a measly text saying "Happy Birthday." I was so hurt and felt so stupid in front of his family when he wasn't around. His parents are divorced and this last October he started spending more time at his dad's house which is about an hour away, but he spent weekends at his mom's and my birthday was on a Sunday. He had even told me he wasn't doing anything. What hurts the most is that I came here for college to be with him- I am about a thousand miles away from my family. I want to stick it out here because I am settled here and I want to finish school. Regardless a week after my birthday I left to visit my parents over break and I didn't even get a goodbye from him. I didn't talk to him until mid January when I texted him to see how he's been doing. Things picked up for us as if nothing had happened, until recently when I came back for school. Now he's dating someone else and I'm crushed. I've been trying to cope with my broken heart for almost a year now, and I feel this will never end. I love him so much and I want things to work out for us. Our relationship started out long distance but we did see each other often and when I had the opportunity to be closer to him I came. I put so much trust and effort into him and things were great until abruptly after Valentine's Day last year when he wanted a break. We took the break and he broke up with me in April. I feel so lost and abandoned, and I feel this has all been so easy for him. He's become such a different person now and I honestly thought that I was going to be with him for the rest of my life. He had given me a promise ring at my high school graduation and we started talking about moving in together. On March 9th of 2011 I experienced a miscarriage because I didn't realize I was pregnant while continuing to take contraception. I've gone through so much with him and have given my all. I don't want to imagine my life without him, but I'm hurting to the point where I just can't bare it anymore. I tried going on a date, but I felt like I was just stringing that person along and I didn't want to hurt them, and I feel like I can't trust anyone now. I feel so lost and I don't know what to do. I felt like I was doing so well and now I'm back to square one. All I've been doing is crying and I can't sleep, I'm just so lost.
Author ria_smiles16 Posted February 18, 2013 Author Posted February 18, 2013 Just to clarify, my ex and I dated for almost four years.
TaraMaiden Posted February 18, 2013 Posted February 18, 2013 ...So in fact, you haven't been properly broken up since "The end of December" (2012, I take it?) Then you've really only been broken up a little under 2 months. Yup. Sorry, but I have to echo mutantswordfish's comment. Move on. This is it. It's over, and you need to rebuild your life. And go complete No Contact.
Author ria_smiles16 Posted February 18, 2013 Author Posted February 18, 2013 Hello, thank you for your replies:) I guess I've just been in the grieving process. I found out Friday night, and since I have deleted him out of my contacts list, I deleted his number, and deleted him off of Facebook. I find no reason for us to contact. I'm just confused with everything that's going on. I wish I could move on to someone else too but I haven't been able to let myself connect with someone else. I just want there to be hope for myself in the future, and I don't want to be stuck in this state forever. One day my ex will be in other relationships, will get married and will have kids. I don't want to feel hurt every time I find out something like that.
Author ria_smiles16 Posted February 18, 2013 Author Posted February 18, 2013 ...So in fact, you haven't been properly broken up since "The end of December" (2012, I take it?) Yes, it's been since the end of December 2012.
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