its 2 months since she broke my heart

[jovan]

She really screwed me over . My story is not that long. I loved her and gave her everything I could. We were very close, and spent a lot (some say too much) time 2gether. She said she loved me just a day before she broke my little black heart . But odd thing about this is, that am not mad on her, am just little bit sad and I do miss her, but I want her to do what ever makes her happy. How idiotic is that ... Am not even judging her even thou I never found out why she broke us apart. We were living 2gethere for 5 years and shared everything, so its little bit weird not having her by my side, but hey I was the one that never needed anything from her, she was the one that always needed my support, so naturally I don't feel a big difference between now and then. Just when I come home and see that she's not here anymore I just smile and say to my self " it was great, I really loved that woman, hope she's doing okay". I feel down sometimes but I have a great bunch of friends that understand me and keep busy, Am really good looking guy and I have a lot of sexual relationships but in some strange way, waking up with those women makes me only miss my ex more.

Now I tried hating her - doesn't work, sex - doesn't work, crying - does not work, drinking - doesn't help, relationship with your dream girl - nope not that ether, focusing on studies and work - does not help.

So am guessing only way to do it is to let time heal my wounds NC and that buyaaa. Well I don't see that happening, case no time can erase a memory of woman that I was ready to spend my life time with. And it may hurt a little bit less in time, but hurting is not a big deal, even that feeling is natural to all of us mortals, and beautiful in its own unique way. Thing that's bothering me here is how come that after all that time, she would do something like that? Was I blind all this time thinking that she's something that she's not, case it can't be it. I knew her so well, we were so much in love (or so i thought). Did she even love me, or just using me case I was so good to her? Was it all a lie? If it wasn't why everything seemed fine till the last freaking moment? I know ppl change, but they can't change in one day. Why, when, how, wtf happend?

Edited February 18, 2013 by jovan

[Love Bytes]

Only she can answer that. She never gave a reason? Just said "It's over"?

[cavalier99]

She really screwed me over . My story is not that long. I loved her and gave her everything I could. We were very close, and spent a lot (some say too much) time 2gether. She said she loved me just a day before she broke my little black heart . But odd thing about this is, that am not mad on her, am just little bit sad and I do miss her, but I want her to do what ever makes her happy. How idiotic is that ... Am not even judging her even thou I never found out why she broke us apart. We were living 2gethere for 5 years and shared everything, so its little bit weird not having her by my side, but hey I was the one that never needed anything from her, she was the one that always needed my support, so naturally I don't feel a big difference between now and then. Just when I come home and see that she's not here anymore I just smile and say to my self " it was great, I really loved that woman, hope she's doing okay". I feel down sometimes but I have a great bunch of friends that understand me and keep busy, Am really good looking guy and I have a lot of sexual relationships but in some strange way, waking up with those women makes me only miss my ex more.

Now I tried hating her - doesn't work, sex - doesn't work, crying - does not work, drinking - doesn't help, relationship with your dream girl - nope not that ether, focusing on studies and work - does not help.

So am guessing only way to do it is to let time heal my wounds NC and that buyaaa. Well I don't see that happening, case no time can erase a memory of woman that I was ready to spend my life time with. And it may hurt a little bit less in time, but hurting is not a big deal, even that feeling is natural to all of us mortals, and beautiful in its own unique way. Thing that's bothering me here is how come that after all that time, she would do something like that? Was I blind all this time thinking that she's something that she's not, case it can't be it. I knew her so well, we were so much in love (or so i thought). Did she even love me, or just using me case I was so good to her? Was it all a lie? If it wasn't why everything seemed fine till the last freaking moment? I know ppl change, but they can't change in one day. Why, when, how, wtf happend?

 

So perplexing. I can see your dilemma. I know the reasons for my BU. They were discussed in detail and i even agreed with many of them.

 

At the end of the day people say closure comes from within. And this is true. I mean her leaving is a pretty big answer unto itself.

 

HOWEVER, at the same time it seem like it would sorta help to have some type of idea. Did she not tell you anything? Her feelings changed? Something you can get your mind around even if it isn't the whole truth. Anything?

[jovan]

She never did. And she didn't even gave the reason why to her best friend... She just said " I don't want to be in relationship anymore". and said that she still loves me and blah blah, you know the type...

Edited February 18, 2013 by jovan

[cavalier99]

She never did. And she didn't even gave the reason why to her best friend... But she said that she still loves me and blah blah, you know the type...

 

Wow man. I guess it will remain a mystery. No point guessing. Just decide that her feelings changed like a light switch. End of story. This is as good a reason as any to hold onto. It is all the same in the end. They are gone.

 

What did she tell you when she left. Did she leave town or something? Was she nice at the end. I guess how did BU happen? Is she with somebody new?

Edited February 18, 2013 by cavalier99

[jovan]

She was staying that night at her mom's place. She was sick. She broke up over skype. Had her friend take all the stuff from her ex home. Told me not to contact her or try to reach her in anyway. She knew if she would ask something like that that I wouldn't. She didn't even change her p.number.

[Love Bytes]

That sucks man.

 

If it makes you feel any better, knowing the reason doesn't make you feel any better about it anyway. :/

[cavalier99]

She was staying that night at her mom's place. She was sick. She broke up over skype. Had her friend take all the stuff from her ex home. Told me not to contact her or try to reach her in anyway. She knew if she would ask something like that that I wouldn't. She didn't even change her p.number.

 

I just read you original thread. She said her feelings changed. She was probably feeling this for a while. We are often blind to this. People who have been considering dumping someone have an uncanny way of maintaining things so we don't know until they are ready to pull the trigger on the BU.

 

So there is your answer. She obviously didn't want to work on anything and just didn't feel strongly any more. So don't be deceived that things SEEMED OK up until the end. The werent for her. She just didn't have the courage to tell you how she was changing.

 

See easy. You don't need any more explanation from her or a deeper understanding to heal. This is enough reason.

[jovan]

I just read you original thread. She said her feelings changed. She was probably feeling this for a while. We are often blind to this. People who have been considering dumping someone have an uncanny way of maintaining things so we don't know until they are ready to pull the trigger on the BU.

 

So there is your answer. She obviously didn't want to work on anything and just didn't feel strongly any more. So don't be deceived that things SEEMED OK up until the end. The werent for her. She just didn't have the courage to tell you how she was changing.

 

See easy. You don't need any more explanation from her or a deeper understanding to heal. This is enough reason.

 

 

 

Thing is, that things between us were as same as always, nothing different. So she didn't have the feelings for me for a longer time... That's the point. Its hard to accept that

[cavalier99]

Thing is, that things between us were as same as always, nothing different. So she didn't have the feelings for me for a longer time... That's the point. Its hard to accept that

 

No they were different. You just didn't see it. I bet it was over the last 6 months or so she was considering it. She just hid it well. Doesn't mean she didn't love you before. She did.

 

All you can do is accept it, this or some version of it , and run with that idea and move on.

[jovan]

No they were different. You just didn't see it. I bet it was over the last 6 months or so she was considering it. She just hid it well. Doesn't mean she didn't love you before. She did.

 

All you can do is accept it, this or some version of it , and run with that idea and move on.

 

 

well I wish it was that simple

[cavalier99]

Ha well it only needs to be as complex as you make it. Pick a reason or decide in life there are always curve balls you never expect and there is no rhyme or reason. Either will work. Do we really need a reason anyway?

 

Sounds like they main issue is you cant forgive yourself for not seeing it. Whether it was the whole relationship or only recently.

 

And if she didn't love you she sure was good at hiding it. Lol not all girls are like this obviously.

[jovan]

Ha well it only needs to be as complex as you make it. Pick a reason or decide in life there are always curve balls you never expect and there is no rhyme or reason. Either will work. Do we really need a reason anyway?

 

Sounds like they main issue is you cant forgive yourself for not seeing it. Whether it was the whole relationship or only recently.

 

And if she didn't love you she sure was good at hiding it. Lol not all girls are like this obviously.

 

 

I don't know anymore. It sucks

[jovan]

day 30 NC or something like that, finely i lost count