randymac Posted August 31, 2004 Posted August 31, 2004 Me and my wife have been seperated for 5 months. She hasn't spoken to me in about 1 month. I cheated on her and understand that there is no 12 month period to wait in a case of infedelity before you can get divorced. The question is this: She wont file, is there anything I can do to speed up the process? I don't see her coming back and there is simply no need to prolong the process. She simply won't return my phone calls or speak to me so I wan't to let her go. I've given her everything and there are no children involved. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
SARose61 Posted August 31, 2004 Posted August 31, 2004 Hi, Here is a link to a good website that lists all requirements by just going to the bottom of the page and then clicking on the state. http://usmarriagelaws.com/search/united_states/divorce_laws/index.shtml You can file and have papers served on her. In fact if it is a simple divorce, no big issue with divisions of property or debts and no children you can type the papers up yourself, file a very simple prosea divorce, represent yourself in court and be done with it. I did it myself. Infidelity is a very hard thing to prove and will require an attorney and money spent. If both of you are willing to just state irreconcilible differences it is much simpler. Good luck to you, Rose
SARose61 Posted August 31, 2004 Posted August 31, 2004 ...hmmm now if you aren't ready to end your marriage, your filing a motion for divorce might affect her in two ways. She will either be shocked into reality and decide she wants to save your marriage. Or she will be thankful that you took the 1st step and either be willing to sign your papers or draw up her own. Either way at least it starts something going. Remember it aint final til the Judge signs off on it. It just aint right for you to just be waiting in limbo not knowing what she wants to do.
Author randymac Posted August 31, 2004 Author Posted August 31, 2004 I've tried to save my marriage but she just won't talk to me. She just hangs out with her friends and pretends that it's all final and over. The last time I spoke with her was 5 weeks ago when I told her I made an appointment with a lawyer. I asked her that if she knew that the marriage was over, then to file for divorce. She said she made an appointment but couldn't get in until 2 1/2 months.....??? Come on this seems very long to wait. I got an appointment in 3 days. I called her after my appointment and left her a message as to what the lawer said and I haven't talked to her since. I live in Canada and you have to be seperated for 12 months before you can divorce but someone told me that in cases of adultery or abuse you can file immediately. I just don't know why she wont file.
Scott S Posted August 31, 2004 Posted August 31, 2004 I live in Canada and you have to be seperated for 12 months before you can divorce but someone told me that in cases of adultery or abuse you can file immediately. I just don't know why she wont file. The laws vary from locale to locale. In Wisconsin, adultery is not recognized as grounds. Divorces are "no fault," & adjudicated as such. The marital property laws govern the division of assets. That is why I didn't file in WI but in South Carolina, which is not a "community-property" state. Where it is grounds, it is the aggrieved spouse that has to file on that basis. You can't charge yourself with adultery anymore than you could hold up a liquor store, & then charge yourself with armed robbery. If she won't act, then you'll just need to wait out the separation.
reservoirdog1 Posted September 1, 2004 Posted September 1, 2004 I'm also from Canada. Here's section 8 of the Divorce Act: (1) A court of competent jurisdiction may, on application by either or both spouses, grant a divorce to the spouse or spouses on the ground that there has been a breakdown of their marriage. (2) Breakdown of a marriage is established only if (a) the spouses have lived separate and apart for at least one year immediately preceding the determination of the divorce proceeding and were living separate and apart at the commencement of the proceeding; or (b) the spouse against whom the divorce proceeding is brought has, since celebration of the marriage, (i) committed adultery... As I read it, if YOU start divorce proceedings, you can't get out of the marriage earlier than one year, because "the spouse against whom the divorce proceeding is brought" would be her, and she wasn't the cheater. The reason for this, so I understand, is to prevent the wrongdoer from using their wrongdoing to their advantage. But, you should check with a lawyer near you if you're still unsure.
Author randymac Posted September 1, 2004 Author Posted September 1, 2004 Are you saying then it's one year from the date that I start divorce precedings? We seperated in april but we dont own any assets together, and there are no children involved so it's pretty clean.
Author randymac Posted September 1, 2004 Author Posted September 1, 2004 We've never started any divorce proceedings as of yet. I guess thats the whole point of my post.
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